*Triggers Possible* Were you ever shown your own videos?

[DamagedYouth]

My uncle first raped me when I was just 6 years old. It happened on the floor of his living room. In the moment all I could describe is the pain and the feeling that he was doing everything he could to break me in half from the inside. That's what it felt like anyway. I had no idea until I was 13 that he had recorded it. Right after my 13th birthday he told me that he wanted to show me something. He pulled out a vhs tape and it started to play. Once I recognized what he was showing me I was horrified. It was like reliving that moment all over again, but it was much more brutal than what I remembered from when I was 6. He laughed through parts of it and told me how he felt while he was doing it. I remember feeling so embarrassed standing there watching with tears in my eyes, yet an erection from it all. He told me that he watched it regularly, but he didn't end up mentioning it again until I was 15. That was only the second time I watched it, and I have no idea what happened to the tape.

 

[Silly]

@DamagedYouth that is reprehensible... I'm so sorry that he did that to you in the first place, but to show it to you years later... thats messed up.

 

[GaD3!]

Hopefully the tape was destroyed somehow. Bad enough to rape you let alone tape it and show it to you. I hope you now understand as an adult, that an erection was just an involuntary response and does not equate any type of approval or enjoyment of what took place. Erections can and do occur in times of great stress, fear etc..