Alcohol to numb or Alcoholic?? Survivor thoughts?

[rileyk86]

Does he drink a lot, and everyday? If not he is probably not an alcoholic. Well, that may be true, at least what I'm told. I'm an alcoholic. If I drink hard liquor I'll drink the whole bottle. I usually can't handle beer though. I used to drink heavily all the time to try and cope with memories of my abuse. I would drink a half to whole bottle of hard liquor every day, plus a few beers. I did this until I couldn't afford it because I lost my job. Surprisingly, I only have one DUI. I haven't had hard liquor in 5 years. Before I was old enough to drink, from age 11 to 20 I cut myself to cope. I replaced that with alchohol at 21. Anyway, the recommendation is to get a separate therapist for emtional issues and alcohol issues so that's what I would do.

 

[Captainplanet]

Dear hiswife
from the perspective of a man going through similar events.
i dont love my girlfriend of 7years, i want to move on with my x, my gf will be left to fend for herself, which i feel terribly about.
but i want my x back, I also smoke alot of weed but I dont deny it either.
i hardly drink
I am unsure if it is my heart that is speaking or the emotional fragmentation of my past that wont allow me to fully love.
I knew from the beginning I would not truly understand what happened to me until I was his age and now that I am, it has made me feel worse, I try talk about it,
took a massive load off my shoulders when I told my mum.
im on day 25 on escitalopram and I have tried suicide 4 times in the past. the last time i tried to od on heroin but my x called me and i decided to make a big change to maybe make me feel better. when in reality i maybe trying to fill a void that will never be full.
Currently still with my gf because we have a mortgage together and trying to sort that is always in the too hard basket.
hope this helps