Lying Excessively

[Geo78]

Here lately I've really been called out on the amount of lies..That I've been throwing around from lying about Appointments for my Child to my Wife and not Focusing on more of my Child's needs. When it comes to Decipline and steady Parenting.. Not Focusing enough on what is really needed for my son.. I feel and I've read in documentation about Children tought to Lie to cover up abuse ..bleeds into later in life.. Spring & Summer for me is very Tramatic with and it seems like I see myself Lying excessively during this thing with both small and very important things..anyone else have issues regarding excessive lying.

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

For me, the excessive lying I did in the past was actually a defense mechanism I developed to try to prevent myself from being slapped across the face by a caregiver who was abusing me verbally and emotionally and sometimes telling the truth would make things even worse for me so I became uneasy if asked a question and I knew that I would be hit no matter how I answered and sometimes lying was the only way to avoid it and my abuser might forget about it later on and never find out that I had lied to her out of necessity.

 

[I Thrive]

For me, the excessive lying I did in the past was actually a defense mechanism I developed to try to prevent myself from being slapped across the face by a caregiver who was abusing me verbally

Sounds like we share a step-monster.

 

[KMCINVA]

@Geo78

Lying is a mechanism to hide the truth, the fear of others learning the truth. As I survivor I lied to myself for decades, trying to make the abuse go away. Well it did not work. I lived in a house where my son was allowed to spit, hit, spy on me with support of his mother. It was encourage--now they lie these events ever occurred. My ex lived in a complicated related family where the aunt and uncle were known to beat their children at times-I witnessed one horrific episode which is never discussed but denied. Only the ex's father would stop it--others hid and to this day still deny and lie about the abuse--they are burying emotions that control them as I did about my abuse. I know I lied as I could not admit the CSA to myself or others and what it did to me.

In time I learned I needed to face the truth of the abuse, the truth of what my son and wife did to trigger the abuse, and to accept what my ex lived through as others in her neighborhood have told me of the abuse she witnessed or heard. It impacted her--in time I hope she frees herself but I doubt she will take the steps.

Lying is part of our coping and defense mechanism. As you heal you realize facing the truth allows you to release the control others have exerted over me.

I hope you are receiving professional help to help you heal.

Kevin