Victor, Little_E, Mike, Jer, RJD, MrEdd, I just read these posts here and all I can say is that you guys are fantastic!
Victor, your pictures speak volumes, man! How do you do that?
For Little_E and Mike: I had almost the same thought about your dream, Elliot, when I read it as Mike did. In your dream you identified your perp as the flying wasps. They were all over the place and impossible to handle or control. You consciously tried to fight off the perpetrator who was stinging you time and time again. I think that this is pretty significant. It could indicate that your subconscious mind believes that you did not invite, nor were you a party to, the abuse that was being perpetrated upon you. Your dream also illustrates that you were not able to control the attacks of your perp, at the time. That's how it commonly is for many Survivors. I myself was 4-5 when the original abuse began, and it was so healing and comforting to me when one of the Brothers here asked me, "Jess, when you were 4 years old and you were being abused by that adult man, how much control did you have over the situation?" I answered, "None." He told me that was right and that is why I should stop feeling guilty, dirty and ashamed, because it was all on the perpetrator and not on myself. I gained such freedom from those wise words given to me by an understanding Brother Survivor. In your dream, Elliot, your valiant though ineffective efforts to stop the perp from attacking you shows courage and strength of character. Also, the subject of your dream may not just be limited to the original abuse situation, but it could also indicate that you are continuing your valiant fight against the psychological trauma and damaging after-effects of that abuse, hence the continuous stings and attempts by the many wasps trying to attack you over and over. Little-E, you are on the road to recovery and you are healing. You are fighting a good fight and eventually, one by one, you're going to knock each of those wasps dead until none are left to sting you, my Brother. You are going to win the battle! We all are.
RJD: Brother! Ow! I could see it happening as I was reading it. I visualized the hammer, I could almost feel the blow to my own head. I swear, I think I even saw those yellow stars that spin around in front of your eyes like in the cartoons. Now, is that empathetic or what? I must have had a similar experience in my life. That would be more PATHETIC than empathetic. Talk about triggering a memory!
Jer: Thanks for the idea you shared about the healing power that can come from the therapeutic use of our shoes. I am going to allow my 4 year old "inner child" to write the name(s) of our perp/perps on the soles of my shoes (sans the expletive, in case someone - like a child - can read it) and my 4 year old little "inner child" is going to take such deliberate and delightful "STEPS OF HEALING" whenever and wherever he walks around with my grown up shoes on his feet. What wonderful support you all give to me and what great suggestions you all have to share. Thanks, Little-E, for sharing. I am always so amazed at the healing and support that comes out of each new topic, and the replies to them, in this forum. Sincerely, Jess.
