Today I have a choice...
Today I have a choice, and that is...
I don't like waking up every day feeling on the edge of panic, but it seems like there's always some kind of crisis in my head. It's true - I have bad days (as these threads have witnessed). There has been recent upheaval in my life that has brought about fresh waves of flashbacks and nightmares of long ago abuses, but what have I done? Do I cower and hide from it all over again? No - I face them as the man I am today and not the frozen boy I used to be. I've cried... I've raged... I've bared my soul to you (my brave and courageous brothers). I've felt beaten and broken, but here I am today still moving forward by my own will and determination and by encouragement from you... my brothers, and by people who support and truly love me.
Today I have a choice, and that is to show myself compassion and kindness. To treat myself the way I wish to treat others. It takes little effort to say to say those things, but putting them into service is a bit different, but that is my choice. Let's try this together. Let's declare this "Be good to me day"... then maybe try it again tomorrow. Who's to say - if we at least try this every day then maybe it'll become a habit.
Much love, Silly
I don't like waking up every day feeling on the edge of panic, but it seems like there's always some kind of crisis in my head. It's true - I have bad days (as these threads have witnessed). There has been recent upheaval in my life that has brought about fresh waves of flashbacks and nightmares of long ago abuses, but what have I done? Do I cower and hide from it all over again? No - I face them as the man I am today and not the frozen boy I used to be. I've cried... I've raged... I've bared my soul to you (my brave and courageous brothers). I've felt beaten and broken, but here I am today still moving forward by my own will and determination and by encouragement from you... my brothers, and by people who support and truly love me.
Today I have a choice, and that is to show myself compassion and kindness. To treat myself the way I wish to treat others. It takes little effort to say to say those things, but putting them into service is a bit different, but that is my choice. Let's try this together. Let's declare this "Be good to me day"... then maybe try it again tomorrow. Who's to say - if we at least try this every day then maybe it'll become a habit.
Much love, Silly