Apology and Big DOWNLOAD! 8^)

Apology and Big DOWNLOAD! 8^)
Hi New Friends!! :)
FRIENDS is.. Such a BEAUTIFUL WORD!!
"Nothing is So Good it last Eternally..
PERFECT Situations MUST Go WRONG! :(
But this has Never Once Prevented ME
WANTING Far Too MUCH for Far too LONG.."

Tim Rice, and Dear Benny and Bjorn from ABBA, "CHESS"
ABBA - New, and Broke My Heart Once More! :)
This song, My Trip into MADDNESS and Recovery.

Please Listen For TONIC! :) The Music is BEAUTIFUL! You think it's gonna be another SLOW song, But the Old ABBA BEAT Kicks in, great SYNTH Bassline for Me! :)

"But now you see another Me
I've been RE LOADED
I Fired Up, Don't Shut me DOWN
I'm Like a DREAM within a Dream That's Been DECODED
I'm FIRED UP, I'm HOT,
Don't Shut Me down!

I''m NOT the one I WAS
I'm Now and THEN Combined,
And I'm ASKING YOU to have an Open MIND!
I'm Not The Same THIS time around.."

AWESOME SONG! :)

Okay,
APOLOGY
New Arrival. I have DUMPED on you enough! Writer/Bard! :)
I have replied to a few Serious threads, and SHamefully have not kept up with Responses. MY Bad Mea Culpa.
I LIKE this place. One of the GOOD ones. You will see some Horrors below, if you will Follow With Me..
Everyone I have spoken to here says it is The BEST talking to Friends who KNOWWW! that they have ever Had.
Ossum.

I am afraid I am VERY Busy at the moment, and can't always spare the time, even for FRIENDS in Distress..
I hope I don't get BOUNCED from here for Advertising MY Forum that is Just a Lifetine DREAM at the moment, You'll see the Nuts and Bolts in the Post below. If you'd like to HELP, and are a good MOD administrator! Hope I dn;t get Bounced for SHILLING for a Site that exist only in My Mind at the moment, But BUSY!
Baby YET to be Born.
Two Letters to MY OWN Big Bro, the most Honourable Man I have ever Known, NEVER ever Lied to me, as a Kid and Beyond.

LOAD TUBES
Open HATCHES
FIRE Torpedos!

I was JOHANN in DAS BOOT! The Engine Genius who gets PTSD from EIGHT HOURS of Depth Charges, and thinking the Next BANG would be a Horrible Freezing Compression Death (Like that Rich Jerk in his Tin Can, PLAYSTATION CONTROLLED Bathesphere to TITANIC).. But I RALLIED, and Apologised to The KAPITAIN, and It Did NOT go on my Record, for Sterling Service! :)
Das_Boot_2.jpg
Das_Boot_1.jpg

The ever Charming, and
Emotionally Manipulative
TONIC!
:)
 
WHEELS ON FIRE!
Rollin' down the Rooooad
Please Notify my Next of Kind
THIS will Soon EXPLODE!


Hi Bro ๐Ÿ™‚ โค๏ธ
Notifying MY Next of Kin! ๐Ÿ˜„

New tenant moving in here, Ingrid. Around 40, aged care worker. LOVES this Peaceful Beautiful place to relax in, has Paid her bond, moving in in 2 weeks. I Like her already. I detect No Damaged Good Vibes from her (unlike departed Lisa, she was an unreconstructed VICTIM and loser. And a PAIN.) She ALSO has a Doggy, about 3 times the size of TOM, named AMAROK, after the Mystic Wolf, not the VW Ute. Very BIG but quiet and Placid, and played okay with TOM. I said she could saddle him up and RIDE him. Seems delightful company. And another SMOKER, so we may sit Outback a lot together...

OPERATION EXODUS: UPDATE: TOP SECRET
Well, I have been TERMNATED, offically, @ HXXXXX. Can't even READ, can't Enter the Dread Portal that None 'cept the Righteous Hard LEFT May Enter (and it sticks something Chronic in the Wet..). After comforting hundreds, and getting them on the MAP with the HEALING OUR CHILD WITHIN Concerts.. which also earned HXXXXX several thousand $$$, I have been Cast into the depths.

I wrote to the Boss. Several times. I sent you some examples. Salieri's Curse. I am already composing a Funeral MASS for HXXXXX! ๐Ÿ˜„I will steal away their BEST and BRIGHTEST, who also think Politcs and Sectarian Censorship are DOO DOO compared to Helping and Healing FRIENDS! When I could only READ, I saw the dismay and the questions, from Loyal Friends, who were missing my Own Charm, Comfort and Humour, and just... ME! ๐Ÿ˜„ I am in private contact with SPIES within the System, spreading the word of Progress.
[Sun Tsu said Good INTEL is worth ten armoured divisions, or words to that effect. Many can already not WAIT for me to get My/OUR Forun up and running.

Several
(Dr ((((LYNDY))), who was also sacked for defending me rather more RUDELY and Angrily than I, I prefer erudite Venom with no rude words in, LoL INCLUDED)
...are prepared to take some of the ADMIN LOAD off me, vetting new members, setting/allowing access to the "Private Parts" of the site. "Our Stories", and more graphic talk of abuses. In passing it is okay to Mention it in General Chat and the like. Setting new groups/folders. WELCOMIN New members. I would have MODS in many time zones to keep and eye on things for me. My talent is CONTENT CREATION and Mind-Fucking (for NICENESS, instead of Evil). LOTS of great administrators out there, who ENJOY Order, No good CONTENT Creators these days, if the endless Daisy Chains of Hollywood FLOPS is any indicator. Phobe Waller-Bridge and the DIAL of DYSINTARY.. $300-$350M. Out grossed by Jim Cavweasle's $20M flick about Child Sex Trafficing. We might be the Next BIG THING! And I, and my Shock Troops will be the Best and Wryest of the BEST.
I told one Lefty Newsgroup:
"We survivors are a Large MINORITY, as Well. 1 in 4 girls, 1 in 6 Boys. But we don't make the headlines, us QUIET Survivors, Because we are working our Asses off, Surviving and Saving our Friends from DESPAIR.

We Abhor this CULT of VICTIMHOOD out there, EVERYWHERE. It dismays and disgusts us, everything we are working AGAINST! We want to Move ABOVE Victimhood Status, and That is not handed out on a Plate, you have to WORK for it, the Government can't make it go away for you, no matter HOW you Protest and Virtue-Signal.
We would like to be Encouraged to be SURVIVORS.
Not VICTIMS."

Basically, I am putting all my otherwise ANGER to Practical Use, and Playing Napoleon and Patton and Churchill and Sun Tsu and Co, we are ALL at work, Channelling our Righteous RAGE! ๐Ÿ™‚

I have started a NEW Email account. to register the site at DELPHI, no coneection to my having Been There Before, and I don't want to be associated with EVERYTHING that lifemasque has gabbed out over the years in various states of intoxication and MaDnEss, should I be Soul CAVITY SEARCHED (been THERE!) if I become Notorious. LoL.
I appreciate ALL the EXTRA SECURITY Pete has set me up with here. Blind, rotating VPNS, anti tracking, anti everything up the Whazzo, AND it cleaned out my Riv'nDELL here, and got it on all 8 Cylinders agian. Like ME just being AWAY from KARK MARK, has done the same thing. Cleared ALL the LOG JAMS of his withering Negativity. I MAY be going a bit TOO happy, hard to tell, still stoned as well to mellow it out and make it more FUN. Still sleeping 7 - 9 hours a night, but still having a BALL, Plotting and Planning, Having a Goal, a FOCUS.. SEVERAL! Doing Music Too.

Here is a Post to RICHMOND: My Senior Agent, but busy, MOM of a 1 and 3 year old! I can drop her a massage and she with get others to word of mouth it to THEIR alias allies. ๐Ÿ™‚
As I said, I have rejoined Delphi as TONIC, all OLD forgotten, and strted to READ the turoials on setting up a forum there. Lots of Permission settings and bullshit that doesn't interest ME in the SLightest.. and it is Hard to Learn stuff that just goes in one ear and out the other, but, as I tell the FORUM HERE - I clicked Advice> Get a MENTOR - I am HIGHLY MOTIVATED to LEARN even THIS to achieve My Utopia online for Unbiased, Honest, Kind, Hard Working SURVIVORS and FRIENDS.
My Ideal of DISNEYLAND, which I LOVED reading about at 13 - 16 years old. 4 Walt Bios, I could go on MASTERMIND with ALL his works and life as a Topic.
He tinkered it ALL (movies and park) together out of Stuff HE was good at. COuldn't DRAW all that well, or write the songs, or the scripts, but DIRECTED, Edited and Produced, to His standard of Genius and PERFECTIONISM. Geniuses and Perfectionist NOTORIOUSLY Difficult to work with, Or PLEASE. He nevr frogot being SCREWED OVER and it made him BITTER indeed, but he still created Beauty. And Pinocchio, Just for ME! ๐Ÿ™‚

When asked why he dreamt up The Park:
"I hated sending my movies out ..UNFINISHED; I could ALWAYS see Room For Improvment, and it was a real PAIN, to me.
Wit the Park.. Anything I donlt like, I can Change. Or Remove. That's the basis of it, I think."

Walt toured EVERY fun park to see what was WRONG with them, Mostly. "Dirty, Phone Gyp Joins like Coney Island".. Hated how Dirty and Squalid they were. He would replace thousands of plants a year in Disneyland, in all the nice parks and gardens and FREE Water Fountians, rather than have signs sying "Do not walk in the grass" blur his Artistic BABY! ๐Ÿ™‚

Well Bro, I have visited Every Survivor UnFun Park there is, and been tossed out of many (after Stirling Work,, and rising POPULARITY - The want to Johnathon E Me, Bro, LoL) , Left many more as UNHEALTHY, met All the right People also working at Knott's Berry Farms or Coney Islands, Or BURNT OUT LUNA PARKS - The Ghost Train and the River Caves.. \

And we are going to build the PERFECT Survivor's Amusement Park - The DISTRACION FACTOR for Negative thoughts and feelings. SOme Serious Sections (Ooh Alliteration!) but Mostly FRIENSHIP 7, Wom I ADORED as a LOST BOY, and Losing PAUL Broke my heart at 6, and I was to lose MORE friends, as a Cripplingly shy kid, Till Robin fastened onto me and destroyed my Self Image, made 8 year me feel.....
EXCREMENT,
Because I had Walked (and rather more) With Him, And cause all the HORROR of Judgemnt Day INSOMNIA Trip, Destroyed my Bromance with Steve Too, and Lovely LYNNE, My ONE GF. And Aunty to my two little boys here. ๐Ÿ™‚ She will be All Aboard too; she is an unemployed LIBRARIAN and Geneologist.

Thanks you, The BEST Parts of UNCLE WALT that Was,
For being an Inspiration to someone who thought they were Crap at EVERYTHING,
and an Object of Admiration, and a Level of Focus I could only have Dreamed about, aged 13 - 14..

TonicLAND!
No,
The SURVIVE HIVE MIND (CULT) LOL )

CODENAME RICHMOND
Do you think YOU could give me a bit of a hand running this BOARD, if I get it up? Hoping LENA will take some of the Admin Load off me,.. I'd like ALL my Inner circle to do some MOD work, when they can - Approving new members, cleaning out offensive posts and Members, and stuff like that. I don't like ADMIN work much, but WILL Do It, I need to be free to Create, which I do BEST. ๐Ÿ™‚

Told Butterfly It would be a FUN/ Light Hearted site with Serious Areas. NO Politics, you can give Your OPINION, if it is not Deliberately Offensive, not have to Cowtow to OTHER'S Stupid, Extremist, Judgmental BULLSHIT.
I told her a funny scene from a Terry Pratchett Book I have all 60 or so of his books, and once exchanged 3 emails with him, back in 1993. He used to hang around the alt.fan.Pratchett site, it was quiet back then. He was Kind, and encouraging, and funny. He is part of MY Writer's Voice, the Fuuny/Punny/Sunny part of my style.

In it a member of a Secret Society comes to the Dread Portal to gain entrance to the meeting. He has to exchange complex Passwords. "The Green Banana Moves SWIFTEST through the Bowels" (that's Mine, but Terry's were funny too). After 3 or 4 exhganges, it doesn't gel, and he realises he is at the Wrong Place. "You want the Illuminated Bretheren, we are The Elucidated Bretheren ("of the Ebon Night). Kind of like Monty Python's "Judean Peoples Front" vs the People's Front of Judea.

I said WE WIll have a Brother Doorkeeper too, who must be applied to for membership, and learn Funny Password responses.

I am Destroyed to be SILENCED from my FRIENDS who Like/Love me, and my heart is full of Vengeance, but enjoying plotting my REVENGE. I told my Bro "I am Enjoying Playing Chess with a Dull, Unimaginative Oponent."

On to The SURVIVE HIVE MIND (Cult!! ๐Ÿ˜„ )

Love
d,d& ME!! ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ˜„

Letter to Potential DELPHI MENTOR! I LOVE Great Teachers, Like Mrs WRIGHT, Lik (((Godfrey) and ALL!
Hope I get a Comittted one! And passionate. A SURVIVOR would be OSSUM - 1 in 4 girlsm etc, you never KNow!
--

From: TonicTheBARD

8:25 PM
Hi. Just Joined to form a new Forum. I don't know my ass from my elbow here, but will go thru the tutorials.

I NEED Premium - other Worker Bee MOD and co managers, Chat room, etc.

I joined as a normal member. UNABLE to Upgrade to Premium, and I do NOT want to star work otherwise, on a Free site.
UNABLE to Upgrade.
Where you page says 'Click here to see benefits and Upgrade", it continually goes PAGE NOT FOUND. Will Not re-draw. Stop CONFUSING me, Please! 8^)


Computer DUNCE, Need Help, but Highly Motivated.
I want to start a New Forum for Child Abuse Survivors. Lots of Good Humour and DISTRACTION from Negative Moods, and Mutual support, some Locked areas for Abuse Details.
I used to be a member of HEARTS THAT HEAR here. KidMagnet helped us out a lot! :) Our Hostess SASSY passed away Last May.

I am a Musician and Writer, and I have a lot of people ready to Join up and Follow Me/US.
Proposed Title "The SURVIVE HIVE MIND". A Fun CULT of survivors.

I have been thrown off of other fora for Not being Politically Correct, and all my Hard work, Love, support, encouragement and Laughter Dismissed in an Instant, Like Abuse Healing and Recovery took second Place to Believing that Breakfast, Sunrises and punctuality (among a million other things) are RACIST.


I do not want to be GAGGED or Censored again. People at MY Site would be allowed to express their OWN opinions on ALL, so long as not intentionally Offensive, not just Parrot MY Opinion. :)
All help gratefully received!

David/TONIC!
 
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There will Be Kaelyn & Lily's PARK, for DID Littles to Play, and chat. I will personally vett any entrant there, No Perverts allowed, you have to watch, but I have Thrown MANY off of sites I MODDED at. Good Anntenae.

Kaelyn you KNOW of, at some Length. My Beautiful Little Sister/Graddaughter. ALL of her Pictures will decorate the page. The ALL have a SHiny SUn in them, despite all her horrors.

Lily was Kind of the SEED, subliminally, Long ago, to TonicLAND. I will credit her anyhoo.
Lily had over a HUNDRED personalities, child, and teen, male and female. New ones were always emerging from the Depths, and Old ones Merging together or becoming Integrated, which is the GOAL, I have had friends go down from 20 to 7 or even 5. My Boys are 90% integrated now too, but I still have their warm natures, courage, resilliance, Love of Friends, and Child like sense of Wonder and Innocence once more. ๐Ÿ™‚
"There Can Be ONLY ONE!
This RAGE That lasts a Thousand years
Will soon be GONE! ๐Ÿ™‚

I will MAP Lily for the site.
She had a whole village/TOWN in her head. Everyone of all ages had their Own SPace to Crash, but would group together if Lonely, of course.
It had pretty flower gardens, with benches where you could sit in the sun.
It even had an AMUSEMENT PARK, but no SCARY Rides...

I figure it just Grew from her HAPPY PLACE she had to retreat to. Over a hundred incidents Horrible and Traumatic enough to cause Personality Shearing, locking away that Little Part Person with all their Bad Experiences, Memory, Pain and Personality , a Little Time Capsule from the Dark Past..

New LOST CHILDREN would emerge from Caverns out of town, finally emerging in self awareness out of some Hell/Purgatory of the Lost Miasma.

One or two Little or Altars would Keep Watch at all times, to Welcome any New Arrivals, and make them feel welcome, often Give them a NAME.
I have chosen Names for two Newborns. Cassandra, aged 9, and MELODY, aged 7. Melody can Read, but only Talks in Smiley Faces. But she is Chief Hugger and Comforter in LENA'S SYSTEM.

A walk Through LILYVALE.. I'll expand on it when I have the TIME! ๐Ÿ˜„
Positively CS-Lewellyan! Alegorical. Dante? ๐Ÿ™‚

Love
Busy Bro-Bro ๐Ÿ™‚ โค๏ธ ๐Ÿ˜‚ ๐Ÿ˜
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Context is Everything!
From a post to my New Little Bro .aseity in the Books/Film/Music Thread:

They want to Johnathon E Me, Bro, LoL [ROLLERBALL, The GOOD Old version - "Do Not QUESTION AUTHORITY"] - NO Heros Allowed, everyone Must CONFORM to MEDIOCRITY with SOME folks...!]) Or they feel Threatened and insecure, and Easily offended by ANYTHING. NO Defences with this Modern UPBRINGING by Helicopter Parents. Not CHALLENGED. I had LEGIONS of DEFENSES at age 8, and built MORE, and that Right Quickly! I will not surrender to Mediocrity. Talent HAS to count, SOMEWHERE. Not just Minority Status. Amen! :)
 
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