Your safety and security. - IMPORTANT !

[Lloydy]

In the last few weeks we've seen a few people posting their email address on the forums, with the best of intentions.

But can I remind you all of the Forum Guidlines at -

https://www.malesurvivor.org/discussion%20board%20guidelines.htm

which reads as follows -

MaleSurvivor works very hard to make our site safe for everyone who comes here. This should be a place where you find yourself: believed, understood and helped. You will find yourself being helpful to others as well.

We ask you to help us keep the site SAFE FOR YOU!

Do not give you true legal name out to anyone who asks for it.

Do not give out your personal email address to men here.

Do not give anyone your home address, phone number or even the city you live in.

Some well-meaning person may ask you to email him your picture. We ask that you do not do that.

Please tell a moderator or Administrator if you receive a private message (PM) that you feel is inappropriate.

If someone here says things that seems to be coming on to you, it would be best to report that to the Discussion board Administrator.

We feel that making public your email address, or telephone number, is a potentially dangerous thing to do and could result in someone being 'hit on' by a predator who might be trawling sites such as this for their own reasons, with no regard to others.

If you feel that you would like to have more private contact with someone then please use the Private Message system.
I can assure you all it is completly private and we cannot access PM's.

The Moderating Team work hard to keep this a safe place, please help to keep it safe.

Thanks
Lloydy (Dave )

 

[Thad]

Thanks Lloydy - That goes for the Chat Room as well - So here are the Guidelines and a comment by Ken Singer, Therapist & MS Board Member.

Please, lets all be familiar with the guidelines - they are there for our safety - Thanks

Comments by Ken Singer

As a place for healing, the assumption should be made that because people have been hurt through sexual behaviors and that judgements about who and what to do sexually have been clouded by abuse, IT IS RECOMMENDED THAT PEOPLE NOT ACT ON THEIR SEXUAL FEELINGS OR DESIRES TO BECOME SEXUAL WITH OTHERS HERE.

Like participation in a therapy group, sexual liaisons are potentially dangerous or damaging. Therefore, people should not seek or agree to meetings since the level of recovery is not known for sure and someone could get hurt.

****************

MS Chat Room Guidelines - Please Read...

Chat rooms can and have been used for people to set up sexual liaisons, whether for live contact or cybersex. MaleSurvivor wants to bring to your attention the fact that people do not always represent themselves with complete honesty. Deception is always possible in any chat room.

We also recognize that some survivors have problems separating intimacy (honest feelings shared with another) from purely sexual feelings or encounters. One of the goals of this organization is to encourage healing through open discussion of feelings and experiences.

Sometimes people, whether well intentioned or acting out their sexual scripts or behaviors, will become involved in powerful dialogs with others that can become sexual in nature.

Our sincere belief is that inappropriate sexual relationships, contacts or events caused long-term problems for many people who come to this website. Sexual feelings acted out between individuals who come here for healing is likely to create problems for those who are vulnerable. This especially applies to those who use sex (cyber, phone, or in person) to engage others, but can also involve prematurely intimate interpersonal dialog that is not explicitly sexual.

Therefore, to keep this site as safe as possible for newcomers, for veterans who are helping as moderators, and for anyone in between in their recovery arc, we maintain that any sexual connection, whether implied or actual, is counterproductive to the spirit and goals of this website. Every moderator, who must operate with a higher standard of care about interpersonal boundaries than the regular members of this site, must report any inappropriate communications between users of this site in order to maintain safety for all.
We owe this to the most vulnerable survivors who come here.

From Chat Room Opening page at: https://www.malesurvivor.org/chat%20room.htm

 

[Mike Church]

Guys please read this carefully. Lloyd and Thad make a lot of sense. We are only interested in your healing and your personal safety that we care about.


Mikey

 

[Wuamei]

Ditto, guys.

Please read the guidelines and pay attention to them. Don't ass-u-me that someone who sees your personal info will have good intentions.

https://www.nonstick.com/sounds/Tweety/lttw_037.wav

Please do not give out your personal info like email addy, phone numbers, etc, especially here on the public forums where anybody can get them.

https://www.nonstick.com/sounds/Tweety/lttw_043.wav

Don't end up having to say this:

https://www.nonstick.com/sounds/Tweety/lttw_027.wav

Really, men, this is important for the safety of this site and all who come here--your safety!

There are reasons this is the safest survivor site
on the net--and we must all do all we can to keep it that way becuz we ARE the site!

Becuz I love all you brother wolves,

Victor

 

[Tom S.]

In Llody post above it says not to even give out the city you live in.
You don't have to, it's on the bottom of about every post made here. I can see by reading his he is from what ever the name of that place, England. Unless it is supposed to be a decoy.
Hmmmm.... A decoy! That's what I need!!
From now on I'll be known as Tom S. from Anchorage!
Now read my quote so you can see how I feel about you precious T's again for another day.

quote: 'In these times of economic uncertainty, it's easy to see who is dedicated to providing health care, and who is chasing bucks.'

 

[outis]

In Llody post above it says not to even give out the city you live in.
You don't have to, it's on the bottom of about every post made here.

Tom,

You can easily have your decoy by editing your own profile. You can be Tom from Anchorage, or another guy from Nowhereland, or someone else from Maryland USA (without specifying U of SA or US of A.)

Later,

Joe

 

[Sleepy]

Tom,
If you're looking for someone to wallow in your own misery, then please don't do it here. Find somewhere else to do that. I'm very serious. I find you constant belittling of therapists (and members) to be very tiresome. All of us here want to feel better and if you're not going to be part of the solution please don't be part of the problem! I'm very sorry you've been jaded in the past, but there are people who are hurting real bad and therapy is their only hope. I feel like you are insensitive to that.

And for all the moderators out there, feel free to delete this post if need be.
Thanks,
Mike