Wound up in the Hospital today...
...last night I had a lot of anxiety and this morning I woke up with a tightness in my chest. When I got to work I was also lightheaded, having palpitations and suffering from tremendous heartbrun. I thought I was having a heart attack and half an hour later found myself in the E.R.
After many tests (six hours later) they told me I had suffered a major anxiety attack and some of my other symptoms were caused by hyperventalating from said attack.
Gents this was one of the scariest moments of my life. I thought I was going to die and my whole life would have been nothing but a big horror show of anxiety and pain. My mother would have won...her psychotic life would have won...and my kids, wife and myself would have lost. I don't know where to go from here...I think when all my memories came back to me two months ago it just pushed everything over the edge.
I do know this, no matter how much damage that has been inflicted upon me I am not ready to lose. I admit that right now I don't feel like everything is coming up roses, but somewhere inside of me is a dedication to find a way to be somewhat happy on a day to day basis..
After many tests (six hours later) they told me I had suffered a major anxiety attack and some of my other symptoms were caused by hyperventalating from said attack.
Gents this was one of the scariest moments of my life. I thought I was going to die and my whole life would have been nothing but a big horror show of anxiety and pain. My mother would have won...her psychotic life would have won...and my kids, wife and myself would have lost. I don't know where to go from here...I think when all my memories came back to me two months ago it just pushed everything over the edge.
I do know this, no matter how much damage that has been inflicted upon me I am not ready to lose. I admit that right now I don't feel like everything is coming up roses, but somewhere inside of me is a dedication to find a way to be somewhat happy on a day to day basis..
