Why the need to put pressure on self...
I posted last night about how the previous two nights were emotionally unbearable.I felt so afraid and conflicted about sharing/telling the special lady in my life about how much porn i watch.Tonight she and i talked about this and honestly if she did not ask me "whats wrong"..i would have kept my mouth closed.As i had said in my earlier post about how i thought i had no secrets, i now know in fact i do not and thank you god i felt safe enough to not only tell her and that she listened but also able to HEAR ME....I beleive there is a big difference between listening to someone and actually hear that person without judging and making it comfortable and therefore safe enough to put it on the table and communicate.Finally i cannot thank this web site and those who know who they are for helping me through a time i thought i'd never find a way out.My outlook on life with her has reached a level only in the last few hours that had never existed in my life up to this point.It does not always have to be about stuff we as survivors struggle with and all the gloom and doome afterall we went through ENOUGH as children to last a damn lifetime.I think it's important to hear that the other end of the spectrum is the happiness we ALL DESERVE therefore i wanted to share the good in my/our lives because i know this much no matter what we are all good people who deserve the love and attention we so desprately needed and wanted as kids.