Why me? Anger questions

[sadanddown]

It seems as though everytime I go out to the bars someone is always trying to start crap with me. What the hell did I ever do to them? Thursday night, it was my buddie's 21er, he got sick at the bar and some guys outside called him some names so I told them to F off...they started with gay jokes, referring to Michael Jackson and started to make fun of us as I was watching my buddy throw up. I wanted so bad to just go hit them, but I didn't. Tonight, I went to the bars again, I offered to buy this girl a drink because she was nice to me, what do you know, all of the sudden a possee of guys are callin me names and whatnot. I know pretty much all the managers/bartenders/bouncers so they always back me up. But I don't get it...it seems like everyone is always out to get me or something. I have had a hard enough time going back to the bars after some very bad triggering experiences, I have avoided fights so far, but tonight I was almost pushed to my limit. Everyone always tells me that it wasn't my fault, and that I'm not in the wrong, but evidentally I must be doing something. Maybe everyone just hates me, I'm getting tired of being a victim of these a$$holes though. I'm tired of being pushed around. It makes me want to go back to a previous lifestyle that I don't want to go back to.

Some of this probably doesn't make sense, but growing up I had problems with gangs etc...I almost want to go back to that lifestyle so people will give me some respect.

Jon

 

[Glen]

First off there is nothing wrong with what you are doing. But at the same time certain bars carry a different crowd maybe you should try a different type of bar. Where I live there are some bars with that kinda wrap. I have fortunately never had that problem in life. Thank God!
Switch bars see what happenes..

 

[sadanddown]

Thanks Glen,

Unfortunately there aren't many bars in my town. Lately there have been a lot of fights breaking out in them. I think I'll just try to stop going for a while, I'm tired of people trying to start crap with me. I'm kind of upset, because it has taken me over 4 months to even want to go back out to the bars and meet people after my bad experiences...and now that I'm going out again it seems like every corner I go, someone is out to start something with me. Argh...I'm so upset...well at least I can laugh about it, I have a new topic to talk about with my therapist this week hehe

Jon

 

[Morning Star]

Maybe everyone just hates me, I'm getting tired of being a victim of these a$$holes though. I'm tired of being pushed around. It makes me want to go back to a previous lifestyle that I don't want to go back to.

May be what you are expereincing a reflection of your shadow beliefs. Just notice what do yu say to your self before u enter the bar. Or what words or thoughts come to your mind when you think of the bar.

If you are going with an apprehension, you are attracting such confrontational situation.

You are as you said the magnet, see what you can change in it.