Why do i want to be used?
I am a big man, intimidating to some people. I am a giant yet all I want to do is be used by men. I find women attractive but find them annoying to be around. I am dominate towards women but men I just want to pleasure.
I have the same fantasies occur over and over, men tell me to do things and I do them. I want them to use me for pleasure. I never hated the man that abused me, he was an old man and I feel like I should hate him, that he abused his power but I don't. I have thought several times about trying to find a man as old as he was to take care of and pleasure.
I read about victims being ashamed of the experience feeling good but the answer is always that it is natural for the body to react, well what if I liked what he made me do to him? What if i didn't like him pleasuring me but i enjoyed pleasuring him? What does this say about me, am I gay? I find women attractive but I am also an asshole to them, I find them annoying and bratty yet, I still find them attractive. I don't understand my sexuality, I just know if a man or a group of men, told me to do something sexual to them I would! If they used me for pleasure I wouldn't stop them!
I have the same fantasies occur over and over, men tell me to do things and I do them. I want them to use me for pleasure. I never hated the man that abused me, he was an old man and I feel like I should hate him, that he abused his power but I don't. I have thought several times about trying to find a man as old as he was to take care of and pleasure.
I read about victims being ashamed of the experience feeling good but the answer is always that it is natural for the body to react, well what if I liked what he made me do to him? What if i didn't like him pleasuring me but i enjoyed pleasuring him? What does this say about me, am I gay? I find women attractive but I am also an asshole to them, I find them annoying and bratty yet, I still find them attractive. I don't understand my sexuality, I just know if a man or a group of men, told me to do something sexual to them I would! If they used me for pleasure I wouldn't stop them!