What's your relationship to your voice?

Logan_WWIB

Registrant
What's your relationship to your voice? Does it feel near or far? Does it feel like yours? Do you like the way it sounds, or what is it like to hear it back? What has given you voice or taken it?
 

GarryDex

Registrant
What's your relationship to your voice? Does it feel near or far? Does it feel like yours? Do you like the way it sounds, or what is it like to hear it back? What has given you voice or taken it?
My inner voice changes dependant upon my moods and mental state, I believe this is normal but I only know my thoughts not others.

If in a positive/peaceful mood the voice is my own, being kind encouraging, humorous perhaps mildly chiding.

When in a depressed mood it can be the voice of my older sister, teacher ex or even my own. These people have at one time or another were angry or demeaning to me.This one points out everything I do/did wrong. Weather the blame, guilt and shame were mine or another person's or even if it was something that just happened. This voice is angry, condescending, snide filled with bitterness. Belittling everything I can think of and anything positive that anyone says about me. Telling me that it's just pity they are having for/about me, which makes me angry at them and myself.

When the depression turns to self-loathing the voice changes again. It's the voice of the woman who sadisticly and systematically abused me for days at a time, for years. This voice sounds like it's right in my ear. I can feel her breath as she speaks each word. Telling me that I'll never be enough of a man, that I'm pathetic, that I should be grateful for her even touching me. "Nobody will ever want you, only to use you....better get used to it!" There is many more that I can recite for you but you get the picture.
 
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