what would you say....

what would you say....
irishguy

irishguy

Registrant
hey guys,

i asked myself this question during the day...and i found it hard to answer myself,i just wanna see what you guys think,

you dont have to answer if you dont want to..

Q: IF you seen your abuser again,what would you want to say to them?

i dunno if i should be askin this question or not..

cheers,
Go raibh mle maith agaibh as bhur gcnamh!
 
Hello, Irish,

I've thought about this question so many times, I can't tell you. I've DREAMT about geting the opportunity fot it, because I doubt it'll ever happen. Here goes.....

"I know what happened, you son of a bitch, I just want to hear if you really thought an 11 year old boy was ready for that kind of mature, sexual relationship.

I blocked it out for so many years that some of the details elude me, so answer me honestly, if you have the balls.....

TRIGGERTRIGGERTRIGGERTRIGGER

Did you rape me?
Did you abuse me?
Did you try to kill me?
WHY DID YOU DO IT?!?!?!

ENDTRIGGERENDTRIGGERENDTRIGGER


That, and LLoydy says, a sure, quick kick to the balls.

I may not be able to stop after one.... :mad: :(

Peace and love, and healing boyo. Lord knows you deserve it.

Scot
 
i dunno what i would say,
i wanna say so much,
i want him to know how much i hate him..
 
I'd probably either run away or just beat the ever loving shit out of him.

Most likely the former since I ran the risk of seeing him at his brother's viewing and left right away so that I wouldn't. :confused: :( :mad:
 
Hello,

My abuser, he was a sport coach I went to for many years. Because I remained active in the sport after leaving him, i still had occasion to see him quite often in the years since. For the first several years, I always had feeling of fear and disgust, because always, he would find occasion to talk to me at competition or practice, or touch me even, and still had so much power over me. I did not start addressing dealing with the abuse until just last year. Prior to having to see him again (I do coaching now), I wrote and sent him a letter, saying very much the angry things I wished to say to him. I knew, and did not expect him to apologize or accept any responsibility, and he didn't. The next time I seen him at a competition, there was a confrontation, which became physical at one point, and I allowed him to harm me again. But I know now that it will not happen again, I was not prepared for that confrontation, but now I am better. I know that I will have to see him again later this month, and I feel more prepared for that.

Leosha
 
i would tell the male doc that he damaged me for life.i have no trust in them any more.i think that i would resort to violence.he realy hurt me.
 
Like most of us here, I have imagined this over and over in my mind a million times.

I have my revenge fantasy of wanting to hold him at gunpoint and tell him about every way the abuse has affected me... from age 4 on up. I dream of doing really sick stuff to him... putting the gun in his mouth to let him wonder when I'm going to shoot, beating the shit out of him and making him apologize for doing what he did over and over, make him plead with me for the pain to stop... etc. etc. etc. Basically, I dream of having control over him for once.

Then, there is a much quieter fantasy for me, but in some ways it is stronger than the revenge dream. If I knew it couldn't backfire, I would kill for him to come to me and tell me he knew what he did was wrong, and that he never should have done it, and that he did it because someone had done the same to him. This fantasy brings me to tears sometimes, it is so strong. I want to believe it wasn't just him being vicious, or getting pleasure out of hurting a little kid, or that it wasn't me that deserved it.

I know that's probably not exactly what you were looking for... for me, it's not about what I would say, but about wanting him to feel. Feel something... anything. Either feel the pain I endured until he understands what he truly did to me, or feel ashamed and humbled by his realizations and know that he worked to figure out why he did those things to me. Sometimes I think I would give my life just to have him tell me why he did it and say he was sorry for hurting me.

This a totally lame reference, but it stuck with me from the movie "Ever After." Drew Barrymore asks her stepmother if she ever loved her at all, even the littlest bit. And her stepmother says something like, "How can you love a pebble in your shoe?" And that is how I feel... despite the fact that my stepfather tortured me for four years of my life, I desperately wanted him to love me, to be the father I didn't have, I wanted to please him, and all I got was abuse and humiliation and pain.

Wow... didn't expect to bring all of that up tonight... hope this helps Irish.

-Sean
 
I'd say, "Hey, guess what you Evil fucking piece of Devil shit?" "I'm going to kick your ass, and your going to say 'thank you very much' when I'm done, and not tell a soul"...
 
i don't think i would say a single word...i would just look at them. once they lock eyes, they would know.
 
I would tell them everything that I think about them directly to their face and tell them exactly what they are, a wild animal, a predator, a rapist, a sex offender, a piece of human garbage that preys on people's trust.
 
I would ask him why he thinks homosexuals are evil, when he is a pedaphile, and that is about the most vile thing on Earth. I would ask him why he had to hurt me so bad. I would ask him how he could sleep at night. I would ask him why he chose me. Then I would punch him in the nose as hard as I can!
Casey
 
i dont want to see him. i dont want to ask him. i dont want to know him. it's beyond all of that now. there is nothing he could say to excuse or change what happened, so why bother? i guess i've let that go along time ago.
 
Had to think hard about this.

I would like to ask my original abuser Chris Denning "why did you tell me that I was very possibly gay?" (otherwise I wouldnt be doing the things I had). That one thing screwed me up for years and occasionally I have to relive it whilst asleep.

As for the rest of them "I would tell them that they are not gay they are paedophiles" because they all give the apperance that they are gay and have no interest in early teens or in Denning case boys as young as ten. They are all liars as well. Denning is currently at large in Slovakia. This article is from 1999.

https://www.guardian.co.uk/g2/story/0,3604,297548,00.html

He is possiblby Britains most predatory paedophile and his survivors must now run into thousands now (I've seen him at work).

BTW I'm not a homophobe I endulged too much in Homosexual affairs as a "Rent Boy" for that, especially when I was homeless and short of a drink or two.

Stay safe

Archnut
"And all that was left was hope"
 
Irish - as some of the brothers here know, not that long back I did bump into mine after 34 years!

It was in a local shop & caught me completely unaware! I was looking at a can of cleaning foam (not long after I'd started therapy, was feeling good)when someone next to me actually said 'alright mate'....yes the bloody perv!

All I could do was cold stare /evil eye him ...total blank....couldn't answer if I wanted too. Afterwards, I wished that I had asked him very loudly if he was still a kiddy fiddler... I didn't & it was too late!

He left the shop pretty quickly & he also lost any remaining power he had over me at that point...I hadn't / couldn't say a word.

Now the power is within myself - I cannot erase the memories ever....I know he is weak now!

Best wishes ...Rik
 
Me again!

I also have times when I think I would like to show them (my perps) the damage a baseball bat could inflict!

Archnut
"And all that was left was hope"
 
I would say, "How do you sleep at night?"

And then I'd add, "I told the police what you did. How do you think you'll sleep now?"

Go raibh maith agatsa as an ceist seo.

Joe
 
Still have to see my perp, he's at family functions like holidays and stuff. I never told a soul who knows him. 17 years after being abused I still have a hard time breathing or acting normal. He knows not to talk to me. Sometimes I hope like hell he'll do something stupid so I can just unleash some instant justice.
 
I hope I could tell him that I survived. He was wrong, people know what it did to me and still love me. I would ask how he could rape a 2 year old and not kill himself. I would ask how hell is and if the "pleasure" he recieved from raping children is worth the eternity of damnation.

I think I would however be speechless.

Pehaps, I don't need waste my time speaking to those who hurt me. I am learning to leave people who cause me pain and not allow them any power over me. It is hard, but I know a enjoy more speaking to those who love me.

The only question I really want an answer to is why. And I know there is no answer.

Ken
 
I'd like to write a tell all book about the sick sh*t that woman did to me and have it be a best seller. Of course she'd be too f*cking stupid to realize it's about her. haha
 
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