What I need to do! TRIGGER

What I need to do! TRIGGER
R

RICK57

Registrant
Just passed my 35th anniversary & I know that the best resolution I have is to actually confront the bastard face to face!

He was an adult (in years & in reality) I was just turned 12. He still lives in the same town & I have seen him walking around recently.

I want to approach him outside of the betting shop & ask a million questions - then I might get some real peace!!??

I wonder if he's got any football shorts or swiiming trunks...the decrepid old fat bastard!!?


Sorry...Rik
 
Rik

"I want to approach him outside of the betting shop & ask a million questions - then I might get some real peace!!??"

So do I but it will be me that goes to prison.

So I prefer to name him in my blog and hopefully the blog will get back to him at sometime just to remind him that I havent gone away and I will be hounding him for the rest of his days.

Its just a bloody shame I havent any photos of him (press or otherwise).

Deniz Corday was his name - Bastard

Archnut
 
Happy Belated Birthday Rik.

Originally posted by RICK57:
I want to approach him outside of the betting shop & ask a million questions - then I might get some real peace!!??
Click to expand...
Confrontation is a really big step that must be taken seriously and thought out prior. Read Ken Singer's article on Confrontation: [URL="https://www.malesurvivor.org/Survivors/Adult%20Survivors/Articles/singer3.htm[/url] "]https://www.malesurvivor.org/Survivors/Adult%20Survivors/Articles/singer3.htm[/URL]

If you still want to go ahead with it, plan it out and review it with your therapist. Have a plan.

Take care,
Bill
 
Archnut / Bill - the reason I want to do this, is that every so often my mind seems to tell me what the next step in this process is. My mind is strong enough now to handle it (I think).

I want to do this in a controlled manner, so that hopefully I get answers & he doesn't just run away (although the thought of that happening is actually bringing a smile to my face).

I feel that I'm 'The Man' now & it's his turn to feel like a stupid little kid. I know that I can do this - I might not be able to pick the time & date, but I can do it!

Even if I only get the answer to a few questions, that is better than nothing. The more I think about it, the more I now believe that he will turn out to be the snivelling coward that I believe he is!

I intend my last comment to him, to be that 'I am watching you now & if I even think you're stepping out of line, you'll know about it.' That's giving the fear back to him!

Best wishes ...Rik
 
Rick,

I don't think it is wise to confront the bastard, I know I couldn't, as archnut says, it will probably be you who ends up in jail!

I know I would. Controlling 30+ years of anguish, never will come out as a barrage of questions, especially if he denies it, and that is just what he will do, or even worse, he may turn the blame back on yourself.

Surely you can make his life hell some other way.
It's never easy, that is how they get away with it in the first place, and take more victims, until they get caught, if they ever do.

You can be sure, they are always waiting to be called to question though, as they find other cases of kids speaking out, sometimes after many years,

Our little secret, turns into one big secret for you and all the others caught up in the evil web.
It can only turn on them, when we have our silence broken, and encourage others to tell, through fairer legal process, which is more intent on not "criminalising", the victim.

take care

ste
 
Bill - don't be mortified, but it wasn't a birthday - it was 35 years since the abuse first took place (35th anniversary).

I've tried the link & cannot attach to read the content.

I still intend to do this (although I would like to read the link first).

My mind is going through such a major change at present - it's like the man is finally starting to appear, but he is walking with the child as equals...the child finally knows it! The perv is going to be dust!

Jim Fowler - your wooly hat may cover your head, but it does not cover who you are, or what you did!

You bastard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

35 years of pain - it's yours now!

*If I thought I was an over inflated bouncy castle, well maybe I've just found spring (let's skip Autumn & Winter)...I'm happy now! *I haven't lost it - I've just found it!

Look in the mirror & smile - no excuses!

Nothing matters other than what matters to you!

Love, life & respect....Rik
 
Rik,

I understand 'things I need to do'. I have felt that before. Just be careful if you DO confront. I have confronted my abusers, and other people as well, even when I wasn't ready, and each time, it has taken something out of me. Energy, faith in myself, whatever good feelings I may have had. Be careful, and be prepared for what that confrontation will do to you. It takes a lot. And I think it can be a positive thing, but it can also be very draining, scary, maybe even dangerous. Please be careful. I wish you luck.

leosha
 
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