What do I do?
Hi. I'm a gay man who has just met another gay man who was raped when he was 18 years old. He has told me that he therefore doesn't like anal sex. This is not a problem to me. However, I'm concerned that I might inadvertently make him uncomfortable by doing other things which remind him of the rape. What is the best way to ask him what makes him uncomfortable? Is it better to be subtle (which I'm not very good at) or to the point? I just don't want to hurt him and want to let him know that I'm there for him and am willing to take things at his pace. Any suggestions would be most appreciated.