UPDATE and more
one_day_at_a_time
Registrant
Yo everyone,
Sorry I havent been here in a while but Ive been at school. I just got back home today for Thanksgiving and I just wanted to come back and write.
My life has changed quite a bit this past semester, I think Ive learned and grown more these past few months than ever before in my life.
Im learning that my abuse has and does affect me. Everytime I thought about it before I just felt this emptiness which led me to beleive that the abuse had no affect on me. But today I know that the reason why I always was so scared to just play basketball with a group of guys is because of my abuse, the reason why it is so hard for me to stand up for myself is because of my abuse, the reason why I always question my sexuality is not really because IM gay (this definitely took me the longest time to realize) but because of what the abuse has done to me. I dont want to marry a man, my brain just thinks of the sexual part of the relationship(another way for me to recreate the abuse, something I dont want at all).
Today,
Im a little stronger than yesterday, and maybe tomorrow ill get challenged more than I can handle, but you know what I know now, Im gonna make it. No matter how hard the fight is, I know I can make it and I know that I can beat this. Even though sometimes it still gets the best of me, I know I will make it.
Thank you everyone here for giving me the strength to confront this, and a place to have to air my concerns.
Strength and Love to all my brothers fightin this hard fight
Peace
One day
Sorry I havent been here in a while but Ive been at school. I just got back home today for Thanksgiving and I just wanted to come back and write.
My life has changed quite a bit this past semester, I think Ive learned and grown more these past few months than ever before in my life.
Im learning that my abuse has and does affect me. Everytime I thought about it before I just felt this emptiness which led me to beleive that the abuse had no affect on me. But today I know that the reason why I always was so scared to just play basketball with a group of guys is because of my abuse, the reason why it is so hard for me to stand up for myself is because of my abuse, the reason why I always question my sexuality is not really because IM gay (this definitely took me the longest time to realize) but because of what the abuse has done to me. I dont want to marry a man, my brain just thinks of the sexual part of the relationship(another way for me to recreate the abuse, something I dont want at all).
Today,
Im a little stronger than yesterday, and maybe tomorrow ill get challenged more than I can handle, but you know what I know now, Im gonna make it. No matter how hard the fight is, I know I can make it and I know that I can beat this. Even though sometimes it still gets the best of me, I know I will make it.
Thank you everyone here for giving me the strength to confront this, and a place to have to air my concerns.
Strength and Love to all my brothers fightin this hard fight
Peace
One day