**TRIGGERS** Very frank interview with CSA victim

[C. E.]

I ran across this interview and it pretty much floored me in explaining the psychic depth and insight into child sexual abuse from a victim who is now 48. The accused perpetrator in this case was Kevin Spacey, and the victim at the time was 14 - but he is not Anthony Rapp. I related to a LOT of the feelings he described, but this article can be quite triggering - although probably more emotionally than sexually.

Actor Says Spacey Tried to Seduce Him at 14

 

[Chris4TheMill]

Disturbing interview, I just read it. There are other questions I would have liked to ask him as a follow-up. But I think the main focus was to detail his experiences with Mr. Spacey and how he dealt with all the confusing and often contradictory emotions that went along with the encounters. I know what that is like because I too have had my fair share of contradictory emotions and desires related to my abuser from my years in Florida.

I liked when the guy being interviewed said "Teenagers have to be protected from themselves. Children have to be protected from themselves. That’s what adults do. They protect them and they create spaces for them like training wheels where they can begin to get ready." That topic comes up again and again here - the issue of "was it still abuse if I was a minor but I 'willingly' went back?" The answer is yes - it is still abuse - because even if our lust is raging at that age, it is the responsibility of the adults to calm us down. Not take advantage of us.

In the 1st episode of the latest season of "Transparent," there is a scene in a sex addiction group where a man shares some insights he has come to, which includes the realization that "I know now that an erection does not equal consent." I second that.

 

[George]

YES, I read this too yesterday and saw the same similarities we all struggle with. Yeah it jumped out at me how he thought he knew enough and that he was in control back then, when (like us) he clearly wasn't.

I had the desire to strangle his parents, WTH, they knew the cousin abused their older son, how on earth did they let it happen and go on with their younger one then???


Definitely wasn't your average interview, but a very good one detailing how boys get sucked up and lost into that matrix. Something most normal people wouldn't naturally understand on their own, so that's a good thing to get out there.

I have one that age now who thinks he's a "man of the world", even though he's a sheltered little boy still wet behind the ears. He's definitely one who needs protecting from himself. Self confidence is a good thing, but I guess like with everything else, in moderation.

 

[C. E.]

Yeah it jumped out at me how he thought he knew enough and that he was in control back then, when (like us) he clearly wasn't.

Precisely.