"Toxic"

[Strangeways]

People are sure wedded to their terminology. I just spent (wasted?) 45 minutes of my day patiently explaining to a whole crowd of people on Facebook why the term "toxic" was so hurtful, shaming, and unhelpful. A few people understood, but the rest really didn't understand that if you want to reach someone, you need to reach them where they are. (And some people were quite happy to taunt me. Hmm.)

I personally have never met anyone who, when told that they or their behaviors were "toxic," thanked the person and vowed to change. Nope! Their responses were more typically brought to you by the letters "F" and "U." But people not only DON'T seem to understand that, they don't even care. It's "toxic" or nothing for them.

Crazy.

 

[OnceInnocent]

haha. very true. people don't talk to be listened to any more though. its all about the quotes.
im sorry for your lost time. it can be so depressing.

 

[Jaxson]

I agree with you Strange. I never use that word, though I know people that do, some on a regular basis. You can't change people's behavior, so why antagonize them with such a word?

 

[Strangeways]

Well I do think you can help people to change if they want to change - but it has to be with compassion, not namecalling. Namecalling just makes people double down.

I feel like it's really weird that no one else can see this.

 

[Jaxson]

Well I do think you can help people to change if they want to change

That is the key. If they WANT to change. And I do see and agree with what you are saying.

 

[OnceInnocent]

Well I do think you can help people to change if they want to change - but it has to be with compassion, not namecalling. Namecalling just makes people double down.

I feel like it's really weird that no one else can see this.

Ur so right. It’s as incendiary as threats of violence, like say wanting to punch someone for having a different opinion. So sad that it’s come to that with some.