Today's challenge

Today's challenge

MrDon

Registrant
Some of you might have heard a week or two ago about a little boy (14 years old - I'm dating myself now) who murdered a fellow classmate in a school in Miami FL. It was a very sad thing and a very tough event for this school.

Today, I was one of several other massage therapists invited to do chair massage on the faculty. In addition to the chair massage, they had some yoga, a chiropractor and some aroma therapy going on. They also had a speaker who talked about dealing with stress and the prinicpal of the school addressed the faculty as well.

It was a tough afternoon for me in many ways and on many different levels. You could sense what took place by walking through the halls. It was in the air, it was in the walls... it was in the whispers.. And I found it rather difficult at times to keep myself focusing on hope rather than on the tragedy of what happened.

But in a deeper level, it also brought back feelings of losing my mom and moved me to tears a few times today. I'm emotionally exhausted right now and just need some refresh time for myself which I will be getting. The range of emotions, thoughts and feelings that I experienced in a time of death seems like a very close and evil twin to me even after a couple of years past my personal event. And yet, my healing is still taking place and today was probably part of it, although somewhat painful.

This was also the first chair massage event that I did with my "peers" - people who had been doing massage for quite some time and were influential in some of my training. So I was a little scared and intimidated but they treated me as one of them, not as someone less which really helped. I saw myself more as a massage therapist and I got to see first hand the differance my hands could make. It brings me to tears just thinking about the power that we all have within ourselves.

On a deeper level, some of what was being talked about was how the body stores trauma and how if it isn't dealt with, the effects it can have on the body. I was so happy to see these things being talked about and references made to abuse children experience. A plea was made that if a teacher saw these things, to not let it go but to take action and help the child by getting them the proper attention/help they needed. It could not have been a happier moment for me today. Personally, I know what the abuse does to the cellular level because it has tormented me for years since my paralysis. I am bound and determined to help others heal the cellular level of their bodies from the traumas that were endured in their bodies. I fully believe and I am seeing this more and more, that body work (of many kinds) helps to bring a much deeper sense of healing and recovery from trauma. It is for sure this way in my life, and I am seeing evidence of it in the lives of others as well.

I would not have wanted to miss this day for the world. I am so happy I got this opportunity to be there. Yes the pain was tough to deal with, the issues weren't fun to face and maintaining a hopeful outlook was sometimes more than a challenge, but these people needed this so badly.

One final note, is that I got to play my cd of music (if you haven't heard it, click on the link in my auto signature and you can hear a few of my songs). It was an honor to play this music, because much of this music was born during the time I was dealing with the main issues surrounding my mom's passing. How fitting for the event today. And even though these people do not know that, the notes tell a story but it tells a story that goes much deeper than the conscious mind allows.

I just had to get this out, because there has been so much stuff hit me today and I didn't want to get this jumbled up inside of me.

Thanks for listening.... thanks for your encouragement from each of you that visit here,, thanks for honoring life by trying to find the way through the doors of abuse... and just thanks for being here! Your strength, fears and persererance are a strength to me that I take throughout my days.

Don
 
I am very sorry for the senseless loss those people suffered, the confusion they must feel. I am glad that you could be a part in helping them to relax some, emotionally and physically. You are a caregiver to those people, and I am sure they appreciated you and the other people helping more then they could probably say. I can imagine how such an experience would bring up some deep emotions for you as well. I hope that you allow yourself time to rest and relax, and take as good care of yourself as you do of other people.

Leosha
 
I think the idea that trauma is stored in the body is new age quackery, its stored in our memories and our personalities. It shows its self in our habits and attitudes, and stays with us for a life time. By the way I really liked Flying In Place. Understanding that we carry trauma with us is the first step in overcoming it. Just because you bring it with you does not make it in charge.

Today you overcame it in a big way and you should feel very proud of yourself. Ada boy Don!
 
Don,

You brought healing to those folks. They probably had no idea just how much they needed it. You brought some more healing to yourself, too, when you saw the good you were doing with the power, training, skill, and caring in your hands.

I like Leosha's choice of the word "caregiver" because you were there to give, not take, anything. You brought those people gifts, in your work as therapist, in your music, in your simple example of caring.

I second his advice, too, to take care of yourself. While you were in school, especially near graduation, you probably were getting some good hands-on help from fellow students and instructors, right? Who heals the healer? Please make sure you take care of yourself. Brian's right, you overcame in a big way. Reward yourself for that. You deserve it.

Thanks,

Joe
 
Leosha,
I will definately take care of myself as I know if I don't do this, I will not be able to keep giving.

Brianz,
Yes I overcame a lot today and did more healing through some of those things that I had not resolved yet. As far as the new age stuff, unfortunately long before I even new what the words new age meant, my body showed me how it could store events of the past by paralyzing me. I would have loved for the paralysis to never have happened, but it did and it was a direct result of what my abuse did to me. It has taken me a lot of time and healing to get to the point where I am at today.

Outis, I do trades with other friends who are therapists which help me a lot and actually writing some of this last night, was one way I took care of myself. You all are very correct that I must take care of myself.

Thanks everyone!

Don
 
Don,

I think you are taking care of yourself in a powerful and fundamental way.

What you've done, where you are, what you do now for others, all of these are inspirations.

The benefits of every massage you give are reflecting back on you and it's great to hear about.

stand me up at the gates of Hell,
but I won't back down
I can't wait til I get to Fl. and you can work on my neck and shoulders.

Donald
 
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