Thoughts on Humiliation triggrs

[reality2k4]

WTF, is humiliation, where does it end???
I wrote about this some time ago, but it is the biggest thing to take away my ego.

Some of the things I feel,
and add some of yours, the list is endless.

Not quite right
inadequate
Unfeeling due to depression
Not seeing a future
Voice of doom
Desparation
Freak
Not normal
Different
F*cked up
Not feeling part of his life
like an alien in his mind
like just some visitor
his body was violated
his mind was too
and all this when he was so young
maybe thats what captures me
he was never a bad boy
he never got into trouble
he never hurt but he gets hurt
why?
He still gets humiliated outside of this place
but how much more can he take?
He cannot dream, I wish he could
what would he dream about?

Did I fight this or is it some weird dream, or nightmare?

If its a nightmare, then do I survive it?
Nightmares where not survivable to me as a kid, but they are only a state of consciouness which I find myself in.

Sometimes I cannot go asleep or wake up and cannot go to sleep, this is hard, so maybe I make comments that do not relate to experience etc.

I know I talk crap here, but it is how I feel sometimes,

sorry,

ste

 

[roadrunner]

Ste,

I have never seen you talk crap here. Sometimes our emotions aren't easy to put into words, and the important thing is to say what you feel and how you feel it. All of your comments relate to experience; that is what makes it difficult to express them. You aren't alone.

Take care,
Larry