things i can't say out loud

things i can't say out loud

Charlie

Registrant
I'm 14, the last time it happened to me was 3 months ago. I need to talk about what happened, I want to say the words so bad but every time I open my mouth they change shape and become screams and angry sounds. I know the words will grow bigger and bigger 'til there's no more room inside.
 
Charlie
Let it out it never gets any easier till you confront your fears. I wish someone would have told me that years ago. Im 33 and just starting counseling and its still very hard. Dont let your perp have that kind of control. If you let it will consume you. And if it helps any consider the men on this site your older brothers who know what you feel and have all been there before. It helps to know that others can relate to what has happened.
Talk let it out. Scream, cry, throw something just let it out. For me it helps to write try that first. There are a lot of people who are willing to help. All it takes is the first step.
See a school counselor, try talking to a health care provider, teacher,minister. Dont shut up and lock down cause thats what really hurts.
Glen
 
charlie,

i know the last thing you feel after being betrayed and molested is "lucky." but something tells me you are. Because you have found this web site, either on your own or from a counselor, you are on your way to recovery years if not decades ahead of most of us here.

Think about it: I am 28, and a relative youngster here (I think). In Richard Gartner's book, "Betrayed as Boys," he says that the average age that a man starts to come to terms with his abuse is his mid- to late-20's.

At 14, you are a child prodigy of recovery. By the time you hit college, you might not be fully "healed," but you will have a fundamentally strong understanding of how your abuse affects your life and relationships with other people.

So start out slow. Read what other people have written and take your time. You are way ahead of the game. Talk when you're ready...
 
Charlie, I am sorry you have to be here, go someplace where there is nobody about and let some of the anger out, screaming and crying can sure tip the lid off it now and again.

Are you safe now? Do you have anyone who will listen, if not, we will,

keep yourself safe,

ste
 
Charlie,

You really have found the right place, and I'm sorry you have had to find us, but I'm so glad you did. Feel free to vent all the anger, frustration, sadness, anything that you are feeling within, even some of the good things that I hope you able to feel as well. f you feel comfortable enough to do it, then reach out on this site, you will be well received, with open arms, and open minds and hearts. I wish you well, and I hope you are safe... Let it all out

peace,

cpt.
 
Thank you. When I found this site I started crying real hard and I haven't stopped. I don't think I can stop but maybe it's not a bad thing. If I'm feeling brave later I'll post some stuff I wrote about what happened. Thanks again, it means a lot.
 
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