Things boys discover


937. My mother would always fix a fancy table spread for Christmas and Thanksgiving and when company would come over. I would always fart. She would use her fancy lace table cloth to set the table. I would always spill gravy on it no matter how hard I tried not to.



938. GROSSLY misjudging the depth of a mud puddle seconds before riding a motorcycle through it at full speed. (Still laughing all these years later, and I can still taste the mud!)

- running your mini bike in the living room is not a good idea

- the damaged furniture from running your mini bike into it in the living room cannot be hidden for long


New Registrant
939.My mom's new clear, bubble-umbrella will not allow you to float off the back porch roof harmlessly to the ground like Mary Poppins.

940. Stupid plastic bubble umbrellas are not very durable!


Garter snakes make your hands smell really bad.

Asking your mother (while company is visiting) why she has a pack of (what you think are) disposable tooth brushes in her purse.
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The Seeker

944. A playing card In your bicycle spokes makes a cool sound, but the clothes pin you attached it with will catch in the spokes, lock up your tire, and get you tossed off your bike into the neighbor's rose bushes.

The Seeker

If you are running home full speed in the dark to avoid being late, make sure your mom hasn't moved her clothes line. And yes, as you are swept off your feet and staring at the night sky above you, remember that technically you are flying. So, you are a super hero. A dorky one but a super hero nonetheless.


BB guns hurt quite a bit.

Adults can always tell when the hose has been turned on.

Sand on the curve at the bottom of the very steep road down to the beach makes it difficult to maintain traction when turning at high speeds on your bike.

Walking your bike back up the very steep road to the beach while bleeding is a lot less fun than the ride down. :p