They know what time it is (MAY TRIGGER!)

They know what time it is (MAY TRIGGER!)
C

crisispoint

Registrant
Well, I kept my word and I went back to the school yesterday. Obviously, it was locked up, but I walked around the outside and tried to get some general impressions.

First, this was the first time since I got the memories back, and I was scared. Scared of a building. Scared because of what I now knew happened to me and probably a lot of other kids there.

They renovated and expanded it, so it LOOKED mostly different. But you can't remove evil, no matter how many coats of paint, new rooms, and brickface you add to it. What happened to me there still hung like a pall over the whole frigging place.

Them I walked to where I knew his office was. Wasn't even part of the school anymore, but the town recreation offices and department of children's services (!). I stood there, shaking like some idiot, and if anyone saw me there, they'd think I was crazy. But they wouldn't know. They couldn't know.

So many places came back into my head of where he's take me when he was being "daddy" to me. All of them tainted now. They won't remain so because the ABUSE didn't happen there, but this place, this AREA, would always remain tainted. Always remain evil. And nobody knows.

Nobody knows but me.

That's when I decided to commit my first act of deliberate vandalism in over 20 years.

I always carry a pen with me, keeps my fingers busy (no jokes, please :p ) and there was some sort of blackboard/whiteboard outside the door, used for whatever reasons, all painted over now. I wrote "Mr. Price, a 'counselor' at Holliston Middle School, raped and abused me here. 1977-1978." I didn't sign my name this time, because I didn't want to be arrested just then. :D

Someone who knew may see it and realize the secret is coming back for them.

Someone who doesn't may see it and start asking the questions that should've been asked a long time ago.

Someone who was abused may see it and know they weren't alone in their pain.

Either way, people are going to know what time it is.

Time is coming for justice. The clock is ticking on those responsible and their time is running OUT.

The next time I write these people, it's going to be to tell them what happened and ask what they intend to do about it.

Yeah, it's immature and wrong to vandalize, but I want that place BACK. I want it back for me and every other child who was probably harmed by that f**king monster and thought they were alone.

I want those who let it happen to KNOW it's coming back to haunt them.

I want my life BACK!

Peace and love,

Scot
 
Scot,

Vandals destroy things maliciously. You have exposed truth.

Thanks for telling us about this. You are getting that place back, and it seems somehow very fitting that you would be at "Children's Services" when you did this service.

Thanks,

Joe
 
Wow Scot! That is so powerful!

You are getting back at him and healing yourself at the same time. Sure there may be more constructive ways, but the important thing here is that you know the difference between right and wrong, and what you did was not so bad.

I think acting out is sometimes the only tool they allow us to have. I remember my abuser telling stories about being a teacher in middle school. He told our family about a chalkboard pointer stick that he would get a static shock from every single time he touched the board. He got so fed up with it one day he broke it over his knee and found a copper wire run from the handle to the tip of the pointer. I know what you are saying to yourself, the same thing I said to myself for twenty-three years, who manufactures a pointer stick with a wire in it?

Not long ago I ran into another man who was abused by the same guy and during our conversation, he says, and those damn sticks. I stopped him cold and asked him what he meant. He explained that our guy would send the students down to the wood shop to make the pointer sticks for him! He said, One year, a kid and I finished the sentence for him, Made one with a wire in it to shock him every time he touched the board. I said, Man, thats just another one of us getting back at him the only way he could.

There must be so many that this guy got. So many of us out there. I am the lucky one because I made it here, the rest dont even know they are still suffering at the hands of this guy with all the marriage problems, alcohol and what not.

How many lives did you screw up Albert Fentress?
 
:) :D ;) :p :cool:

Scot,

You said, "I want my life BACK!

Peace and love"

AMEN!!!!!!!!!

PEACE AND LOVE TO YOU!!!!!!
 
Scot,

That was a very powerful post. I'm glad you shared your experience. What courage and bravery you have!

Peace,
Scotty
 
a powerful journey. i hope it helped you find a little peace. i havent gone back to dayton where i was abused, and doubt they would let me on the base anyway. i have been to the woods where i acted out later in life, and i know those gohst that it stirred up in me. i can only imagine how terrifying going back there was for you.
 
Now that I think about it, just about every time I'm in my home town I drive by his house. I think I do that as a sort of affermation that I'm not crazy. That the place is there and the abuse really happened. I guess part of me would still like to wake up and find that it's all a dream and I didn't have to deal with any of it.
 
Scot I am speechless. I see a MAN taking life back in a big way. What a change has come over you. I am proud to know you and be your brother in this.
 
Scot,

You are amazing to me. What you did took such strength. I know it can be very hard, but also very liberating, to 'take back' those kinds of places. I 'took back' my old training center in December, and it was an amazing feel to me. It helped me to realize that the 'place', that is all it is, a place. It does not have mystic power, it does not have power over me. It is just a place. You have learned that too. Congratulations.

Leosha
 
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