Therapy

Therapy
T

Trevor

Registrant
so i talked some with my doc last nite. i told her about this place and she said it was a good idea. i told her that id try an co operate with her more, cuz i do wanna get better u know? i pretend like its not a big deal and i pretend like i dont wanna get better, cuz i like being pissed off at everybody in the world and its a good excuse to pick fites. but none of that is realy true. i just wanna be normal and i dont wanna feel guilty anymore. i live with my stepsistr and she has no clue that her father and her bro did this shit to me. i never told her. so me and her will fite sometimes but its hard to tell her what im feeling or why im being an asshole, cuz she dont know. my doc askd me to invite her to one of my appointments. im thinking ill do that soon. maybe. i dunno.
two things in therapy last nite .. she askd me if i had any one good memory from growing up and if id tell her about it. i do, but its not a normal nice memory to have, but i remember there was this one guy, a friend of the stepbrother, he was nice to me. i mean ya he was making me do shit and he was doing shit to me that i didnt want, but i mean he wasnt violent, he didnt call me names and he didnt just treat me like a hole. he would even ask me if i was ok and he would yell at the stepbrother for going to far with me.
so thats kind of a good memory of all that i guess, its the best one i can think of, aftr i told her i felt really sick and i dont remember what the hell she said about it. i feel kind of sick rite now saying all that in here :rolleyes:
oh well.
she askd me about one real bad thing to but there was no F-ing way i could tell her. not to her face!
thanks for reading this if u did
trev
 
I read this. All I can say is that I'm sorry to hear that your 'best' memory is someone who didn't treat you as horribly as your stepfather and stepbrother.
 
Trev,

It's heartbreaking to see that your best memory is of someone who abused you less violently than the others. But there we are. If that is your memory then that's where you have to begin.

I think it's a good idea to bring your stepsister to one of your sessions. You are living with her, and I think it makes all the sense in the world that she should know what is troubling you. She can't help if she doesn't know.

But talk to your T about this and discuss exactly what you should do and say. Remember, this is YOUR information! You control it and you decide who knows. But once you begin to tell people that absolute control of course decreases. Give careful thought to what you want to do and why.

Much love,
Larry
 
at least its something. dont say sorry to
me and dont feel bad about it, i dont.

im just not sure how shed react when she
hears that her dad and brother did all this.
i mean she must know some of it i think
but maybe shes in denial? i dunno. its not
gonna be easy for her, its her real dad
and brothr and shes close with them both.
 
Trev,

im just not sure how shed react when she
hears that her dad and brother did all this.
Click to expand...
That's why you need to talk this over carefully with your T. Even in the best of scenarios it will be a difficult experience, but the bottom line is that you need support and she seems to be in the best position to provide it. The rest of the family dynamics will be an area where your T will be a great help.

Much love,
Larry
 
Hey Trev,

I'm thinking of you. larry says some great things for you to think about. I don't know what to say really. I just feel for you and hope things can get better. just know that we care about you and keep talking. A lot of us here didn't for decades and it didn't get better for us until we started talking about it. I'm proud of you for looking at all this.

Dale
 
Trevor, my best memory was when I left my parents' home at the age of 17. That was the single greatest day in my life. After that day, there was no more abuse, no more arguing, no more alcohol, no more blood, no more violence, no more cursing, no more pretending to be someone I wasn't. I didn't even care that I had little money, no car, no furniture, and nothing to eat--I was finally free.

Jesse
 
Trev,

I had a thought while reading through this thread. You say your step sister is taking care of you. I think she must care about you or she wouldn't be doing that. That will be something to keep in mind while you are considering whether to tell her or not.

Like Larry said, it's your information and you will need to weigh the options very carefully before telling anyone. When and if you decide to tell someone like your step sister, it would make sense to do it like your T suggested and do it at her office.

Take care and I hope you can stay safe this weekend.

Lots of love,

John
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top