Therapy Level Up

[JC1]

Been in therapy now for quite a while with someone I really liked, but just this week started with another therapist. They decided that I needed someone with more experience in male sexual trauma. So I went with the plan. There's a side to me, though, that says I must be more f****d upon than I thought. I know I shouldn't think that way, but I still do. And honestly, as I look at myself I see someone whose actions suggest that I haven't changed all that much and continues to pick up bad habits. Is it that down deep I don't want to improve, or what? Or that I just don't have the right tools to handle things? That one takes the responsibility off of me- There's a bunch of potential excuses and explanations. All I know is that I need to figure it out. If I don't want healing, or if I don't believe it will ever happen, then I'm done.

 

[Jack1]

I have been in therapy with a good T for several years but even so I still have my good days and bad days. I don't think there is a complete getting over it. I think that learning to deal with the issues and possibly not being triggered and anxious as much as I was will help. I go through some periods where I feel like I have this CSA thing liked and then sometime later I'm back to the same old shit. I do have to say that overall I am doing much better and it isn't controlling my life the way it did.