The Poll of all Polls.
The Poll of all Polls.
- Thread starterLloydy
- Start date
These Polls are me figuring out how to work the damn thing as much as anything else, but do let your view be known by voting, and if there's a big majority one way or the other then we'll have to respect that or talk about it some more.
So, if anyone has any ideas about what they'd like to see Polled then let me know and we'll have a go.
The software does allow for multiple questions and multi-choice answers, but I'm still figuring it out a bit !
I don't know if there's anything we should avoid or at least be wary of, let me have your views on that as well.
I do wonder though if the relativly small number of users, nearly all with the same background and problems, would result in poll results that were biased and unreliable, and maybe of more harm than good to us ?
I don't know at all, but if there is anyone out there with knowledge of surveys and polls perhaps they could guide us.
Dave
So, if anyone has any ideas about what they'd like to see Polled then let me know and we'll have a go.
The software does allow for multiple questions and multi-choice answers, but I'm still figuring it out a bit !
I don't know if there's anything we should avoid or at least be wary of, let me have your views on that as well.
I do wonder though if the relativly small number of users, nearly all with the same background and problems, would result in poll results that were biased and unreliable, and maybe of more harm than good to us ?
I don't know at all, but if there is anyone out there with knowledge of surveys and polls perhaps they could guide us.
Dave
I agree with Blaidd. Seeing the answers to polls let me get a feel for where I am or where I might want to get going to.
I think it would be helpful to know the different ages of guys here. e.g. 0-18 18 t0 25 etc etc
I also think it would be helpful to know who the perp or perps were e. g.
family membe
friend of family
babysitter
clergy
coach
youth leader e.g. BSA
Male
Females
Perps under age of 18.
how long a member of MS/Nomsv/M.A.L.E.?
It just helps to knopw others had a similar experience. or others have been around for such and such a time and are still working on recovery.
Bob
I think it would be helpful to know the different ages of guys here. e.g. 0-18 18 t0 25 etc etc
I also think it would be helpful to know who the perp or perps were e. g.
family membe
friend of family
babysitter
clergy
coach
youth leader e.g. BSA
Male
Females
Perps under age of 18.
how long a member of MS/Nomsv/M.A.L.E.?
It just helps to knopw others had a similar experience. or others have been around for such and such a time and are still working on recovery.
Bob
Ditto. Actually Bob these are just the types of polls I had in mind. Particularly about who our perps were. Maybe also the number of perps, the number of times we were abused, our ages when abused, things we've done to get help, etc.
Again, I'm willing to wait for more opinions & feedback on this.
Dave, your poll is a good idea for starters.
A poll about polls--what a concept!
Victor
I like everyones ideas for questions. I also think it would be interesting to know what age you were when you were victimized. I feel that I am the odd ball since I was "of legal age" for three of my 4 sexual assaults.
I was also wondering if these questions could be placed in someones "profile" I know that I talk to so many guys in here and while all of our stories are similar I get confused who is who. It would be nice if when chat, you could pull up their profile and get the answers to the questions.
Also, No one would be forced to give out information that they didn't want to.
Just an idea.
take care
John
I was also wondering if these questions could be placed in someones "profile" I know that I talk to so many guys in here and while all of our stories are similar I get confused who is who. It would be nice if when chat, you could pull up their profile and get the answers to the questions.
Also, No one would be forced to give out information that they didn't want to.
Just an idea.
take care
John
John, you surely are not the only one here who was assaulted after reaching the age of consent. It is just that the fellows who have mentioned that have not posted lately.
Sometimes I wonder if it would be of value to have guys here who connected with some other survivor drop them a pm to let them know they are important to us.
I did that last evening. I hope the guy is ok with getting my message. We have had some really great guys come, post for a week or tweo and then stop. I don't know about you, but I miss a lot of them.
Bob
Sometimes I wonder if it would be of value to have guys here who connected with some other survivor drop them a pm to let them know they are important to us.
I did that last evening. I hope the guy is ok with getting my message. We have had some really great guys come, post for a week or tweo and then stop. I don't know about you, but I miss a lot of them.
Bob
Questions I've had on my mind since coming here:
For me, knowing that I'm not alone with my laundry list of post sexual abuse/childhood neglect consequences is a bridge to making connections with other survivors of SA. So many times somebody has posted something here that has stuck a chord with me that helps me to know that I'm not a freak.
These polls could serve as a beacon for areas the MaleSurvivor Organization could focus on.
jer
- Do you think/feel that your life will never get any better?
- Do you read the posting and don't know how to reply sometimes?
- Are you afraid to post your own topic (start a new thread) because you think you can't write very well?
- How big of an impact has your sexual abuse experience(s) had on your life?
- Are you in an intimate relationship now?
- Have you ever had a truly close "I'm in love with this person" intimate relationship? If yes, for how long?
- How disfunctional was your family (or whatever you grew up in) when you were growing up?
- Did you feel like a social outcast in school? Starting when - elementary, jr. high, high school, college?
- Do you think you have a sexual addiction?
- What do you need that this web site doesn't have but might be able to provide?
- Do you have good memories from childhood?
- What do you do for fun now?
- Are you in pyscho-therapy now?
- Do you have confusion over your sexual orientation?
- If you feel emotionally/socially stunted or arrested, at what age would you rate yourself?
- Do you have a spiritual life? How do you practise it?
- What do you want most from life?
- What tools/tricks/coping mechanisms have been most effective in your recovery?
- Have you reached a point in your recovery where you feel you've resolved your issues so that you can lead the life you want?
- Do you think recovery is a lifelong process?
- Do you think recovery is possible?
- Do you have hope for the future?
- Are current events (global, social, environmental, economics, etc.) having a negative impact on you now?
For me, knowing that I'm not alone with my laundry list of post sexual abuse/childhood neglect consequences is a bridge to making connections with other survivors of SA. So many times somebody has posted something here that has stuck a chord with me that helps me to know that I'm not a freak.
These polls could serve as a beacon for areas the MaleSurvivor Organization could focus on.
jer
Jer, those are all good questions, any of which could probably in some way be put in the form of a poll.
Some of the ones that particularly speak to me right now that I'd like to maybe see a poll on, somewhat in order I guess:
Victor
Some of the ones that particularly speak to me right now that I'd like to maybe see a poll on, somewhat in order I guess:
- Do you think you have a sexual addiction?
- If you feel emotionally/socially stunted or arrested, at what age would you rate yourself?
- What tools/tricks/coping mechanisms have been most effective in your recovery?
- What do you do for fun now?
- Do you have good memories from childhood?
- Are you in pyscho-therapy now?
- What do you want most from life?
- Are current events (global, social, environmental, economics, etc.) having a negative impact on you now?
- Do you have a spiritual life? How do you practise it?
- How big of an impact has your sexual abuse experience(s) had on your life?
- How disfunctional was your family (or whatever you grew up in) when you were growing up?
- Did you feel like a social outcast in school? Starting when - elementary, jr. high, high school, college?
That's a very good point Jer. Polls are not just about stats they are about people.
Victor
Thanks Wifey1, that's one I forgot that is actually near the top of my list! I also wanted to ask specifically about how many have chronic pain disorders like fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, etc. And whether or not this has been diagnosed (dx'd) as being a direct result of SA trauma.
Gotta remember to keep that one in mind for future reference. Thanks again!
Victor
Add to the Physical ailments Temporal Mandibular Dysfunction.
Here is a quote from a letter that my dentist sent to my attorney:
I am anxious for the polls to get going.
John
Here is a quote from a letter that my dentist sent to my attorney:
Mark (my dentist) knows about the S A and thinks that probably the reason that I grind my teeth is my way of compensating for the S A trauma.
I am anxious for the polls to get going.
John
Hi John, I have had bruxism for years--I wear a night gard that helps during the night. But I do exercises during the day to loosen up.
Surgery was suggested to me. I talked to a couple of guys who had had the surgery and they were not positive about it so I will continue with what I have.
Did your dentist give you some exerecises to do?
Bob
Surgery was suggested to me. I talked to a couple of guys who had had the surgery and they were not positive about it so I will continue with what I have.
Did your dentist give you some exerecises to do?
Bob
Well, I see polls as a cold way of interacting. This forum is for discussion. I would hate to see the "Polls" taking over.
And all of those Poll questions can be addressed in the Forum, and discussed. You start a topic and then get feedback. People give opinions, feelings are expressed, diffent points of view are brought to bair.
And I find being asked those direct,extreemly personal questions quite intrusive
But I guess I cant stand in the way of progress
And all of those Poll questions can be addressed in the Forum, and discussed. You start a topic and then get feedback. People give opinions, feelings are expressed, diffent points of view are brought to bair.
And I find being asked those direct,extreemly personal questions quite intrusive
But I guess I cant stand in the way of progress
My entirely personal view lies somewhere in the middle I think.
Polls such as the other one I posted asking how long it had been since we sought help will hopefuly provide some useful guide as to the experiences of recovery we have as a group, and at the same time I don't think it's intrusive or likely to triggering or contreversial.
I think that if we start comparing our abuse by using polls then we run the risk of indulging in 'league tables' of abuse.
That could be as damaging as it could be helpful. It might well reasure someone that because he was abused by the largest group then he couldn't possibly be to blame, but could it also make someone ask themselves "is it really that important then, if I'm in such a big group ?"
Maybe I'm wrong, but my view ( not as administrator ) is that I can see a good reason for collecting hard data, such as the suggestion of possible physical ailments, but less reason for just asking who did what to us and when.
Dave
Polls such as the other one I posted asking how long it had been since we sought help will hopefuly provide some useful guide as to the experiences of recovery we have as a group, and at the same time I don't think it's intrusive or likely to triggering or contreversial.
I think that if we start comparing our abuse by using polls then we run the risk of indulging in 'league tables' of abuse.
That could be as damaging as it could be helpful. It might well reasure someone that because he was abused by the largest group then he couldn't possibly be to blame, but could it also make someone ask themselves "is it really that important then, if I'm in such a big group ?"
Maybe I'm wrong, but my view ( not as administrator ) is that I can see a good reason for collecting hard data, such as the suggestion of possible physical ailments, but less reason for just asking who did what to us and when.
Dave
Just a few ideas about polls. I know I contradict myself.
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I wouldn't mind if there weren't any polls.
I don't think polls serve any real purpose unless they require a yes or no answer. But even then, it's arguable.
Some of the questions listed above I wouldn't mind answering, depending on the choices of course. And I'd really like to know if current events are giving other Survivors a hard time too. Hmmm. Maybe I should just ask????
I think they can lead to unfortunate comparisons and harmful conclusions. Look at the How Long poll. 30% have been in therapy 10 years or more. That can be pretty discouraging. It's easy to overlook the fact that that is 30% of only 27 responses, or 8 people.
There's no ability to explain an answer. Look at how many of us were compelled to explain and amplify what we answered in the poll.
But actually that may be a good point to polls, if they encourage discussions.
They could also be a way for someone to say something without saying it. An anonymous answer that they might not feel comfortable posting.
Then there is the great burden on the pollster. It is very difficult to come up with an unbiased question, and then he has to come up with a variety of answers to that question.
A question might also be loaded with assumptions or prejudices that might be very common but are far from universal.
The "How Long" poll doesn't have a choice for "I'm not in therapy - haven't started yet". I wonder how many more responses there would be if that choice were in there?
Oh well, I always have the choice not to answer a poll. But I hope that there is always an answer that means "none of the above" or "this question doesn't apply to me".
************************************************
I wouldn't mind if there weren't any polls.
I don't think polls serve any real purpose unless they require a yes or no answer. But even then, it's arguable.
Some of the questions listed above I wouldn't mind answering, depending on the choices of course. And I'd really like to know if current events are giving other Survivors a hard time too. Hmmm. Maybe I should just ask????
I think they can lead to unfortunate comparisons and harmful conclusions. Look at the How Long poll. 30% have been in therapy 10 years or more. That can be pretty discouraging. It's easy to overlook the fact that that is 30% of only 27 responses, or 8 people.
There's no ability to explain an answer. Look at how many of us were compelled to explain and amplify what we answered in the poll.
But actually that may be a good point to polls, if they encourage discussions.
They could also be a way for someone to say something without saying it. An anonymous answer that they might not feel comfortable posting.
Then there is the great burden on the pollster. It is very difficult to come up with an unbiased question, and then he has to come up with a variety of answers to that question.
A question might also be loaded with assumptions or prejudices that might be very common but are far from universal.
The "How Long" poll doesn't have a choice for "I'm not in therapy - haven't started yet". I wonder how many more responses there would be if that choice were in there?
Oh well, I always have the choice not to answer a poll. But I hope that there is always an answer that means "none of the above" or "this question doesn't apply to me".