It has been some time now since this happened and it is finally good to really see all of this in perspective. I've been able to talk about it with classmates more now and the instructor and I have a much better working relationship. I feel much more empowered about myself and like a lot of stress was taken off my back. So all in all, I'm glad that I was able to work through this process and get to the point I have. It is just nice to look back and see this entire event in a whole different way.
Hey, Don, it's David........Ivanhoe, nice to meet you.
I just read your thread and I wanted to add my congratulations.
When I read the frist part of this, I noticed how insightful you are with your own reactions to your triggers.
I just get mad most of the time but I am getting better.
I particularly appreciated how your resolved this issue.
I see three areas where you were a positive influence--there are probably more, but these three stand out:
1-You stood up for yourself in an important arena, the school setting.
2-You were an example for the other students.
3-You were an example for us.
I'm already thinking of others as I'm sure readers here are thinking--
another would be the other instructors and the way that they perform as teachers--they ought to be the most professional!!
Thanks for all of this--you remind us all that there are areas in our lives where saying, "ouch," and working for resolutions in those situations are important.
David
Danny, here. Just want to say please keep letting us in on the details of your life in recovery. The abstract notion may be intellectually comforting, but personal experience such as yours can be life saving.
Real life and real recovery, lived day by day, class by class, emotion by emotion. Thanks for being so willing to grow in public. It helps me alot.
REMARK OVERHEARD IN A COFFEE SHOP:
"When you have the ability to look at your own
feelings, you no longer need to engage in
control maneuvers to protect your feelings."
Thanks Don, for welcoming me and letting me learn from your experience. A precious gift indeed.
I do appreciate your comments. I do appreciate you saying that it makes a differance when I share these things. I try to keep my life open but sometimes that is very scary for me and I don't know how it is always perceived. I just know like both of you have said that I learn so much when others share things about what they are going through. Textbook therory is fine, but real life down in the trenches stuff gives me hope and inspiration. I'm a firm believer that I didn't go through this abuse to just hide it under a rug. I think part of the bigger view of the universe involves me being a link in the chain that holds us all together and helps each one of us recover. Of course I'm not a person that could just ignore others when it comes to healing as I know just how horrible this is to deal with.
David,
I do think standing up for myself made a big impact on me. My clinic instructor asked me if I had talked to this guy today when I went to clinic. That was nice that she was thoughtful enough to check back with me on it. I told her I did and what transpired as well as it was some personal growth for me. I feel just a tad bit stronger out in public now than I did. I'm gettin that voice back.... little by little.
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