Terra Incognita

Suwanee

Chat Moderator
Staff member
Disclosure: My dad was not in any way involved in my abuse. However, after tackling the csa, I see how my childhood perhaps set me up for what happened at summer camp. My dad traveled a lot for business. Consequently, he was a great provider of material things, but fell short in emotional availability. What I jotted down here on New Year's Eve was a stream of conscious thought about my life.

Dad,

What is the measure of a man? You are loving though you are hard to love. Our relationship as father and son is one of criticism and compassion. Are my efforts good enough? Are you disappointed? Did I make the grade?

You overcame.
You mined the ore and found the gold.
Will I find it before I grow old?

Are my feet too leaden to move with haste?
Are the ghosts I run from quicker than the ones you chase?

Who will cross the finish line first?
Who will die of thirst?

As you are to the father before you, I am your immortality.
What is done is done.
What Will be Will be.

Alea iacta est

Will
 

Shyshark

Registrant
That was beautiful Will.
My father was similar to yours ... gave me everything I needed ... but not what I wanted.
In the years since he died I have struggled to make my way and along the rocky path I have found him everywhere ...
in me.
Now I understand.
 
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