Taking Buspar

Taking Buspar
P

pjn

Registrant
I am feeling a little better since I decided to get therapy. My doctor put me on Buspar to help me with the anxiety attacks.I find that talking about my abuse to my father helps me but I am a little apprehensive about starting therapy still.Tonight we had a long talk where I told him my fears about starting therapy. My father is old and sometimes I overwhelm him with this but we are coping.
Getting back to the Buspar most people say it takes a few weeks to work but this wasn't my experience. I actually got a anxiety attack the first time I took it. After a while a started to feel better and even noticed after a few doses that I didn't have the intense fear I sometimes feel .I can allmost feel myself turning the corner emotionally not being so irrational about things. I had a outburst of anger today and didn't notice it untill my father pointed it out to me. I was putting a new floor in the living room and got mad about something said on the news. Ah who cares about the news anyway I got bigger fish to fry. I know I worry alot about becoming the type of monster that did this to me. I don't know why since I lived most my life and at 40 I haven't done anything to that degree. I guess I worry and bring trouble on myself too much. I am hoping these fears are part of the healing process I don't know. When I went to the Dr. to set up my therapy he asked me how old I was when this happened and I told him 7. he said the trauma was more severe if you are real young so I guess thats part of the problem too. I feel frightened at times and gulty that I am dumping this on my father at his advanced age but right now I don't have anyone to turn to besides this board. PJ!
 
PJ You will find out that Therapy is realy good. Your dad will be there at your side to help as you move down the HEALING path.
Don't worry about dumping on your dad, he needs you also. Tom
 
Dont worry about dumping stuff on the boards, its one way of dumping something that you dont have anyone to talk to about.

"I know I worry alot about becoming the type of monster that did this to me. I don't know why since I lived most my life and at 40 I haven't done anything to that degree. I guess I worry and bring trouble on myself too much. I am hoping these fears are part of the healing process I don't know. When I went to the Dr. to set up my therapy he asked me how old I was when this happened and I told him 7. he said the trauma was more severe if you are real young"

We probably all thought we could turn into that monster who takes away innocence, its good that we rejected those thoughts, even though they corroded our minds.

My MD does not know the first thing about trauma, I am glad yours does, guess it is time to teach her about it.

CSA is a subject so taboo, that people just want to hide away and pretend it does not happen,

ste
 
Thanks Tom and Ste I guess you can tell from the time of my posts I usually make them late at night here on the east coast. I feel especially horrible at night. I guess sleep disorders goes with the territory hahaha! anyway thanks again!
 
PJ,

I feel frightened at times and gulty that I am dumping this on my father at his advanced age.
Click to expand...
I felt like this at one point, but then my sister said to me: "Any good father would want to know this. Because he's 80 does that make him too old to be your Dad all of a sudden?".

She was right. My father was shocked at first and felt very guilty, but in a day or so he came around and he has been a huge help to me. He definitely wouldn't have it any other way.

Much love,
Larry
 
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