CLOSED
Don't think I don't appreciate everyone's good wishes and helpful thinking, I do more than I can express. I'm not trying to be difficult and I agree with what everyone says but unfortunately I am lightyears from being there. I know I have to work on it and my meds have helped tremendously to calm me down, more or less stop my mood swings and let me sleep most of the time quietly.
There are two things that I see I'm having trouble conveying to everyone about my childhood. The first is that my childhood was my "normal" I never fought the way I was. Second I know some of you know about that year I was forced to do things that I will regret forever. What I think that everyone here is missing is that whether I was forced or high as a kite I destroyed many souls. The screaming crying faces I see everyday. Yes I was forced, yes I was scared of the torture and yes I was only the stick used to make these people money, this stick has feelings though. I have trouble forgiving myself just because I wanted to save my own ass. This is the image I have of myself.
I had better stop here, I'm having a problem with this at the moment.
I just want to thank everyone for their kindness. I want to wish everyone peace, healing and a happy better and brighter new year.
Peace, Rainbows, Love, Healing & Hope
There are two things that I see I'm having trouble conveying to everyone about my childhood. The first is that my childhood was my "normal" I never fought the way I was. Second I know some of you know about that year I was forced to do things that I will regret forever. What I think that everyone here is missing is that whether I was forced or high as a kite I destroyed many souls. The screaming crying faces I see everyday. Yes I was forced, yes I was scared of the torture and yes I was only the stick used to make these people money, this stick has feelings though. I have trouble forgiving myself just because I wanted to save my own ass. This is the image I have of myself.
I had better stop here, I'm having a problem with this at the moment.
I just want to thank everyone for their kindness. I want to wish everyone peace, healing and a happy better and brighter new year.
Peace, Rainbows, Love, Healing & Hope