Survivors have an 80% chance of being an addict?

[Dan99]

I agree with the need to deal with the deeper causes. Years back I briefly attended a 12 step, one night one fellow who was sharing about how he was starting to connect the dots between his childhood abuse and his addiction. I thought this was wonderful, but silly me, what do I know. To my amazement, one of the leaders of the group cut him off (Ummm Hello no cross-talk!!!) and told him that "We only deal with the behavior here, not the causes." The guy was utterly shut down and said not a word more.

I understand exactly what you mean. I've lived in cities and very rural areas. In cities it's possible to find good meetings. I've been to many feedback meetings where sharing is encouraged. And I've been to some meetings that were very limiting -- they basically were a place for people to go so they could avoid drugs and drink.

In more rural areas, the choices are limited and it seems the meetings are less helpful. One old timer told me that he thought it was necessary to get away from discussing causes in meetings because the discussion could trigger other people who weren't ready to deal with a particular issue.

To anyone going 12-step, I would encourage you to think strongly about getting a sponsor. The real work of recovery for me always happened outside of meetings, either on my own, in discussion with sponsor or with others who were facing issues similar to me.