Some days

Some days
D

Dan88

Registrant
Some days I just feel like being a victim is all there is to me. No matter what else I do or try to do, it can all be minimized down to nothing next to the reality that I am this malfunctioning, fucked up human being.

I'll just go on saying that this will pass. But I am tired of this shit.
 
Dan,

I can really relate. I trust some of the "elders" (no reference to age, just level of wisdom) on this site when they say things do get better. Sometimes it feels like that's all I've got. I think I read somewhere on MS that a big step comes when you realize that you're something more than just a survivor of SA. When I read that, I thought for sure that I had already reached that milestone. I've come to realize that I'm not there yet, but it's something to strive for.

I'll close with a suggestion I find hard to do for myself, but that I've been encouraged to do by tons of folks on MS: be kind to yourself.

We're here for you.
 
Dan - Those assholes who hurt us, left us with, as you say, shit. And cleansing ourselves of someone else's shit is nothing less than exhausting. But what choice do we have other than to rid ourselves of their shit? It never belonged to us in the first place and if we let it linger then we let them win. Keep up your strength, every day, until the purity you deserve is yours. We're here to listen and help. - John
 
Dan88 -

I think there is a prediction process here in place - perhaps but there is more to it -

I used to suffer from predicting the bad result -
and then self fulfilling that -

Part of therapy also revealed additional concepts
and this what may better suit your expression -


There is a concept of 'messengers' -

We all have messengers - that we send out to
give back to us the result we are looking for - or used to seeing - to verify - confirm our suppostion - and perhaps - keep a common self conception in tact -

it's a big topic -

Dan - we have spoken a number of times - not too much though - I know you are a talented person -

May I offer looking into a therapy that helps you become more aware of how the way YOU WERE treated and NOW PERCEIVE YOURSELF - can be turned into an SELF AWARENESS that changes INTO A POSITIVE SELF UNDERSTANDING -? so the messengers will change -

You are OK Dan-


Mark
 
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