Small Victory (possible trigger)

Small Victory (possible trigger)
P

Pete2004

User
From time to time, I think back over the major childhood incidents that set me up for CSA. (One were family friends, one older and one my same age) We were at their farm and we boys went to walk in the field. The older boy wanted to teach me about masturbation. He and his brother whipped it out and proceeded to show me how. I remember being fascinated and used the memories for years in masturbation. For years I felt as if it was an activity that bonded me with the boys. In reality, it set me up for future abuse. Because of the guilt, I wasn't able to remember how uncomfortable I felt in the beginning of the "session" and how I wanted to leave... until today. For some unknown reason, it really comforts me that I was uncomfortable and wanted to leave. That's new information that just "bubbled up" and a small victory on this recovery road. I just wanted to share this with my brothers here.

I really respect the courage you have in addressing your sexual abuse. No one is a whimp that comes here to find freedom.

Regards,

Pete

(or Pete2004 in chat)
 
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