Secrets From A Small Mississippi Bayou
PhillthyGuy
Registrant
This is going to be 100% RAW and FULLY UNCUT and even more than that. “I Swear Fo GAWD” if you worry about kid stuff and zoophile shit you need to stop now. I will give you a first hand account of what I witnessed. I am not going to go back and edit anything so if i dont catch a misspelling, oh well. I don't even know how much I will share. I'm just going to start and see what happens. I'm typing on a computer so I'm comfortable. I had so many emotions and memories from reading y’alls stories
So, let’s just kick this off with a little confession: I never thought I’d be putting any of this down for strangers to read, much less telling another person anything about this. Hell, the fact that I’m even typing this right now is a small miracle. But here I am, spilling my Fuckin guts, and you can thank my wife for that. She’s the one who convinced me to share this, saying something about "healing" and "helping others." I don’t know about all that, but hey, here goes
Now, don’t get me wrong, my wife knows a bit of this story. Not really much because of how she was protected as a kid, and I don't think she could handle the Hard Core shit She’s been with me for ten years now, so she’s got the basics down. But I’m not gonna lie, there are parts of this story even she doesn’t know. Not because I’m trying to keep secrets—okay, maybe a little—but mostly because some of this shit I haven’t even wrapped my head around yet. You know, the real stuff, the stuff you bury deep and don’t let out at the dinner table. The stuff you really only let out because you are so fucking horny and you are okay because you just are....
Before I go there, let’s rewind a bit. I’m 44, been married twice. My first wife and I lasted 17 years, which, let’s be honest, feels like a lifetime. We’ve got two boys—18 and 14—who live down in Mississippi with Her. Then there’s my current wife and our 5-year-old daughter, and just to keep things interesting, she’s got two daughters from a previous marriage, 18 and 15, who live with their other side of the family. My crew and I are here in Kentucky. We’ve been living in Kentucky for the past nine years, trying to keep it all together, which sometimes feels like herding cats, but we make it work.
Up until a few years ago, I was doing a pretty good job of pretending everything was cool. I mean, sure, I had some weird shit happen to me growing up in this little beach and bayou town on the Mississippi Gulf Coast, but who doesn’t, right? I’d shove those memories into the "weird but whatever" category and keep on trucking. Honestly, I didn’t think too much about it. Hell, sometimes I’d even catch myself thinking back and—don’t judge me—enjoying the memories in some twisted way. I've Looked back a lot throughout time and masterbated to what happened to me until i finally realized I was being tricked into being a sex toy and raped. But it was always really fun. Weird as hell, Right?
But then I hit 41, and boom—shit got real. It was like all those memories I’d been ignoring decided to stage a coup and take over. Suddenly, I wasn’t just reminiscing about the past and masterbating to it. I was reliving it, Obsessing over it with the things done to me and the things I feel bad for doing things in the name of getting an unforgettable nut, and let me tell you, it was not the fun trip down memory lane I thought it would be. No, it was more like, Holy shit, how did I manage to shove all this under the rug for so long? The only thing I can think is I’ve been watching my 5 yo daughter growing up and I would lose my shit if anything ever happened to her and when I say that I mean everyone involved loses everything too. This new way of thinking is new to me. I have to protect her. It's really easy to see in all the ladies now that they are all someone's daughter. I believe it's because she is my only daughter and sons are a bit different. I never really worried about my sons like I do my only daughter now. But that was childish thinking on my part because he came to me about a year and half or so ago when he was 17 and told me that his step brothers had messed with him. My whole world fell. I realized I was a fuckin retard.. It happens to boys too. Oh Yeah!!! IT HAPPENED TO ME!!!!!!!!
That's when everything started making sense to me. The stuff I enjoyed when I was young was not just two cousins exploring, playing doctor, learning how to give blow jobs so when you get a girl you will know how to handle a BJ without cumming too soon. (Yeah, I remember him telling me that one time) He taught me a lot of crazy things. Hell, the spoiled little only kid brat was 6 years older than me. I manned up, found the courage and told my son that I understood what he was going through. He was the first person I told that something happened to me and I'm going to have to go back in time and put everything together. I was glad he wasn't holding it back. Something sad that he said that made me blurt out that it happened to me was he said “Dad I promise it wasn't them that made me gay,” I was like Oh no I know it didnt baby because Something like that happened to me and I love the ladies. I feel like I failed him. But we live over 400 miles away. Life sucks and I can't legally go beat up some punk ass kid that did that to him. Probably legal by now but that won't solve it. Healing is a solution though.
And that brings us to now. After 41 years of pretending it wasn’t that bad, I’ve decided it’s time to tell the whole story. All of it. No sugarcoating, no bullshit. There’s going to be stuff in here that’s hard to read—sexual abuse, dark memories, the kind of stuff that makes you squirm. I’m not holding anything back, I'm not sure what y’all will think of some of the stuff i have done in the past. Especially the illegal parts so if you’ve been through something similar, consider this your warning. This shit could get heavy. Well It will get heavy. Trigger this Trigger that, they gunna be flyin all over the place. But for real though. If you get offended because someone forgets to add the trigger warning that sucks. You should expect every story here to be raw. This one definitely will be
I’ve never been good with journals or diaries, because, honestly, I’d die if anyone found them. It would be even worse if they put it back because of shock and didnt say anything to me but just look at me fucked up the rest of my life. Probably call the law on me for some of my thoughts. But this place is right here. I never knew I could tell someone. No one knows who the fuck I am here but you all know what the fuck Ive been through. That feels a little safer. And if sharing my story helps someone else feel less alone, well, maybe that’s reason enough to put it out there. I a lot of y’all stories there was parts in them that would ring bells in my head that would tell me things like “Yep, that's why I think about that” and “Damn he fucking trick me the same way he got done.” I mean did some of these creeps have conventions to learn how to diddle the kiddys.
Getting this out has helped me understand my Hyper-sexual shit my whole life. I pulled and jerked my dick every chance I got growing up. That's the reason why my dick is a good size. I kept it full of blood all the time. This shit explains all my impure thoughts that men should not think. I was always thinking about sex. if it had a hole i would fantasize about fucking it. Especially animals. I'll explain how that happened as we go.
So yeah, I’m not proud of everything in this story, I never thought I could truly tell the whole story to someone. I was seeing a therapist but have slacked off. I couldn't tell her this yet and don't know when or if I could. I don't want to scare the poor girl. I see a psychiatrist because I finally got on some medication that I realized I needed. I never believed in meds before but now I see I needed some my whole life. But she don't fully know. All I told them was I had an older family member mess with me when I was growing up for years. Never went into detail. Them two know and my wife know. Nobody knows exactly how it went down and how it put seeds in my head that warped my thoughts on sex and how it made me think and the things I did because of it. I really wish I could sue for this shit but……Boo Hoo
These are some things I want to figure out from sharing things here. I want to know, why have I been horny my whole life? I want to know why as a kid, I would hope that one of my cousins or my sisters would get horny and start to instigate a sexual little play date?(I expected it at some houses.) And yeah one of my hot step sisters with some big ass boobs was alway horny. Me and my blood sister played also but not as much. Also why is it that when i was left alone for over half of the weekend i would try and plan how i was going to get my moms dog to keep his dick in me for a longer amount of time so i could try and cum through my ass hole before Bear could cum and stop fucking and pull out. Why is it that at the age of 15 I was looking at girls as young as 8 10 and 12 and noticing their shape and how when i look at her hips I could see that she had the perfect definition and amount of fat to body started matching the shape of a grown woman but it was just in a tiny package Bla Bla Bla Bla BLAAA… I used to just go on and on like that in my head till it felt like it would pop.
Throughout my life I have had to question my morality for the things I have done. I know I have done a lot of things to make me feel good in my life. and i think most of the feel good was sex things. I have to make sure I stay within the boundaries of nature, reality, and Ha Yeah IDK. I never stayed within the boundaries of nature. I used to walk around in the fields next door with a flash light during my first marriage. I had red clear plastic taped over the tip of the flash light so it would produce low light that could not be seen less than 100 yards away from me. I would start the night looking for mushrooms to trip on, find um and eat um and then be across the field with my fingers in a female horse pussy feeling it twitch and trying to find the clit, It's a horse from across the way that looked at me funny when I went out to piss in the mornings for a while after that.
I felt so bad when I read all y'alls stories. I ain't cried like that in a good min. And i'll tell the full truth. I found myself getting hard reading some of these horrible stories and that confuses me and makes me feel like I have my abusers mindset. like he was embedded in me because of what he did and how fun he made it all. It was never anything bad. At the end it got BLA and kinda boring so we stopped. I always thought it had stopped because I was 16 and he was like 21. The last time we did something he came to the house and told my stepmom he needed me to help do something. It sounded fun but he just wanted me to suck his dick down the road by the bridge and then bring me home. I was thinking it would be something fun but.. Sorry if it seems like I'm jumpin around. I don't even feel like I really started tellin my story yet. I got to get to the beginnin
I was lucky that i was not done like a lot of the people here that was tied up and painfully beat and raped. I am truly sorry any of this has happened to y'all. We were all babies. What The Fuck Man??. My physical abuse was done by my stepmom and my drunk dad at home. they never sexually messed with us. I loved to get away from home anytime I could. I think that helped make the things happening to me outside the house feel right and felt like a relief to get out. Mostly I would go to my grandmothers on my dads side. Other places were my different aunts that had cousins around our age. My dad and real mom divorced when I was 4 and my sister was 2. My dad quickly met this loony toon bitch that would have a joint in one hand and beat me with the bible with the other hand.
Ok now let's try to start this story. The first sexual thing I ever remember in the beginning of my life was when I was a 2yo. It's the first and farthest memory I have. It's like everything was blurry and it cleared up. I was looking at a red, blue, and yellow tubed bubble pipe. I blew the last of the bubbles and I was out. I guess no one was coming to fix it and I knew that to get it to go you had to pour that shit in there. I looked at my hands and to this day I can see them fat chubby fingers pick up that blue bottle and pour it all the way out on the floor tryin to make it in the pipe. Now I know why I had that pipe and the fresh cardboard ripped packages it came out of on the floor in front of me. Took me years to figure it out but it was a toy someone bought to keep me occupied. When I turned to the left I seen this guy butt ass naked on top of my naked mom. I can remember all the details and I was only 2. The guy had this platinum blonde mullet with a bald spot on the top. Had a big belly and the blonde beard made me think of santa. He had a big belly. I remember seeing the Tiger on the wall that was made out of that black felt material that you painted and would fill in the pic, but the main thing I remember is seeing his dick going in and out of her. It's still cring to me today but i'm letting ya know how much detail i remember. The main thing that I remember is seeing white cum from my moms vag all over his dick (YUCK) on his dick looking the same shape and size as the big blue veins on his dick. I remember thinking that I could imagine what the white stuff feels like to touch.
All this detail was something i just blurted out one afternoon to my step mom at the age of 5-6. I was too young to make up these kinds of details.That might have been because the stuff that started happening to me triggered the memory. The first sexual thing I remember ever doing was with my step sister that's about the same age as me. We had to be 6ish or something. We was in the closet and she pulled her panties down. I touched her and went down and started kissing on her hips workin my way all over but before I got too far the babysitter found us and ran us off. The next things i remember is my cousin. He lived with my grandmother and his mom and dad. The house was a good size. Everyone had their own room. That was my first sanctuary. I could go there for the weekend and not have chores, not get yelled at or hit, and it's where i started to learn how to be a sexual deviant. And like I said. It was always fun and never anything i didn't want to do. He had the gift of gab.. One day I rolled over and started to hump on my cuz, we can call him Jonathan. No that's too long. Let's call him JB. we’ll keep everything anonymous, right? Or protect the guilty? Not sure but i got other cousins im going to have to give fake names too later on, But anyway back to JB and me humping him. Well my uncle was walking by the door and seen what was going on. Well JB can sell pure human shit to a fucking germaphobe. He convinced my uncle that what he seen was me trying to get a nintendo controller he threw. Just think how easy it was to convince me of shit.
He convinced me that genitals and that tingle equals happiness. The first real time I remember playing with JB was when I was about 8 probably. It was going on before that but lightly. Like over the close late at night stuff, but this time was special and very memorable Ill admit that remembering it gets me hard but it feels strange and confusing because not to long ago when i woke up to what he did to me, I was disgusted thinking about this exact scenario. This is what changed my whole life. Not just sex shit but my whole perception of what i thought reality is. I mean he caused me to brainwash myself into thinking it was ok to pleasure and be pleasured by animals as long as you are not hurting them. The night in question was just another fun weekend. Me and my blood sister I’ll call her Lisa was staying at my grandmas that weekend and JB would be there. His parents (my aunt and uncle) would not be there all weekend. We knew it would be a fun weekend and we could do anything we wanted because my grandma , i’ll call her Mom, because thats what everyone called her. I didn't even call my mom mom. My sister and I called her by her name. My step mom would have beat us if we called her mom instead of her. They hated each other. So when it was just me, Lisa, and JB we ruled Mom.
When we got there it was always right after school. When we knew we were going to Moms for the weekend she would be there waiting for us to get there to take us to her house. We always stopped by the store to get some cookies and cream ice cream and other foods we didn't get at home. I remember getting there and asking where my uncle's car. She said they weren't there but JB was. We looked at each other and was like YAY!!!!! Lisa was 6. We walked in and JB was playing a new game he just got. It was top gun for nintendo. We eat and played abit and Mom came in like she always did and told us not to go outside or open the door and JB was in charge. Then she goes back and we here the squeaky door close. The door always gives a great warning that she is about to come down the hall but she never usually comes back out. As soon as the coast was clear JB was like “LET ME SHOW YOU SUMTHING” He had a dog they just got a few weeks ago that was getting obedience training. He brought the dog in and showed some tricks. It was a big ass German Shepherd with some huge nuts hanging. JB was like you want to see something? He pulled out his cock and made the dog be still. Then he put his soft dick in his mouth and the dog didn't move. He said “SUCK” and the muther fucker startes to suck like it was a puppy suckin a nipple. That shit blowed me and Lisa's mind. I couldn't even imagine what she was thinking being only 6. Lisa and I were so fascinated by it. We went over and petted the dog at the same time. He got me to toutch his nuts as he sucked. JB said we could take our clothes off because we would be dress before Mom would open the door and get to the living room we were partying in. me and her stripped so fast and was not sure what was next. I asked if I could do it but he said he wanted Lisa to lay down first and see if the dog would lick her pussy. Well he did. I remember thinkin that her pussy was so tiny that his whole tongue was picking her ass up off the floor every time he licked up. She could not stop giggling. He was making sure we was having fun. And he was only 14 or 15. He knew what he had and what he was doing. Now not too long before that one weekend I spent the night was the first time he gave me a BJ and let me give him one so I was ready for another one and now I know a dog can do it. It was crazy to me.
Lisa started to get way too tickled so she jumped up. Apollo is what I’ll call the dog and he kept trying to lick her. JB stopped him and told me to come here. He said look, watch this first and he started jacking off apollo. He started humping the air and it looked really funny to us and we laughed. His red rocket came out. In my head I was like so that's how it can come out.. Very interesting. My dick was throbbing at that time. And this was pre ejaculation. I had never even cumed before. I was too young. JB latched the dog's mouth right on my cock and I was in heaven. It was the warmest thing ever. I know why now because a dog's normal body temp is 102 degrees all the time. Well I was just there letting the dog do its thing and thinking about how his red rocket came out. JB was on his belly in between Lisa's legs eating her pussy out. I was watching thinking that's where she pees from. But that's the last time I let that bother me the rest of my life. I would watch how he would hold her legs apart as far as they could go and lick and kiss her pussy. The only light in the room was the grayish blue light from the paused Top Gun game we were playing before. Watching them was when I learned that a girl's lips are the opening to the vagina. I could just see the glistening from her juices when he would come up to talk and point out that these juices are a lube that girls naturally made so the dick goes in and out easily. I often wondered if the things he would teach me were coming from his mother. The way they acted back then would explain a lot. He was an only child also. That night i do remember he tried to penetrate us. He started by trying to stick his tongue in Lisa's pussy but it was way too tiny. He got me down there and I tried to penetrate her with my tongue. I got in just a widdle bit. I mean not even enough to count. She was so small. I licked on it for a min while he played with my ass hole. That was the first time someone had ever touched it. He was trying to get it in but I really wasn't in the mood to try. It just felt like I was going to shit. He got me to lay down and had Lisa suck on my dick as he tried to finger her ass. For some reason she was liken it more than I did. She was pushing up against him. She didn't like it when he tried to stick his pinky in her pussy. She said it hurt so he stopped right away. He never wanted us to not like it. He got up and went to his parents' bathroom and got something. He came back with some astro glide, and yeah that's what it was because I remember connecting the name to “ass hole glide.” and a small pink makeup brush. He got behind Lisa again and put the lube on the pink side of the brush. I couldn't see because of the way she turned so I got up to see. He was rubbing it around and started working it in. she let him get a little bit in for about 5 mins. He was so excited that he got up and was thinking he could put his cock in. but she was like ouch, that hurt,. I was about to get mad but he stopped and started licking her ass hole saying, this should make it better. While they were playing I had to go see if I could get the red rocket to cum out. I went to Apollo and started rubbing his cock. He started humping the air and i felt the rocket come out and then it got all wet. JB said you just made him cum. That warm wet stuff is his cum. That just blowed my mind that I just satisfied an animal. I was really confused. I hadn't even had an orgasm myself yet. I had felt like I found a way to thank animals for being such awesome creatures. JB tryed to poke me in the ass a little more by licking my ass whole first but i still didnt feel like i wanted anything up there
I'm not sure about Lisa but I came out a changed person after that night. A hornyer person. A little time went on and I would try to go back to Moms without Lisa as much as I could. Not sure if it was to save her or was it to keep her away from him and save her all to myself. IDK. but me and JB would do all kinds of things together. We always sucked each other's dicks. A lot. Everywhere all the time at the church that his dad preached at. In the back of the car under a blanket that we let the seats down to make a tent to hide in when we went to mobile AL sometimes. They had to know something was up. But… Whatever…Lisa and I went to my real moms house every other weekend. It was a great break from the fire and brimstone environment I was living in during the week. I tried to be at my grandma's house on the weekends I wasn't at my moms. At my moms house I had straight freedom. My moms mentality was “If you're going- to do it, I would rather you do it here” and that meant drugs and everything. The first time I ever tried crack was in Gulfport Mississippi driving around with my mom at the age of 15 as we trying to find a guys house that she knows so we can roll the mOther fucker. That means get his wallet and any drugs. Me and Lisa would help my mom. I'll call her Ruthie. Ruthie would bring us to guys houses and we would keep the kids occupied so Ruth could ether fuck him to get some cash or she would get him fucked up and we would leave with the dudes wallet. The first time I tried meth was when I was 16 and we went and met a biker in mobile and drove all the way back to a shitty roadside apartment on HWY 90 that looks like a crack hotel in Pascagoula. It was me Lisa My mom the snaggletooth dude that got my mom the shit My 14 yo cuz all call him Marty and his girlfriend. So yeah my moms place was fun to me.
. I was about 10 or11 when I was home at my dads house. I was doing the dishes and got horny. I was down petting our female shepard mix and she was all in my face licking me. I started to kiss her and started french kissing her. She got me so fucking horny. The only other person I ever frenched was JB one time. He isn't into kissing but I wanted to see what it was like to do it. It made my dick hard. It did the same thing when I kissed the dog. Later that night when everyone went to sleep I called the dog to me to kiss her again. My cock got so hard that I got up and tried to see if I could stick it in her pussy but my dick was way too big. And I couldn't really push because I wasn't going to hurt her. So I just let her lick my dick till she got tired and walked away. I was wishing she was trained like Apollo. One thing JB did teach me was how to stimulate a male dog's prostate by slowly working in your lubed finger and finding the bump Inside the asshole and how to rub it to make them cum to collect the sperm for their mating business his parents ran for a bit. So my next mission was to get to my moms house. Well I took a month to finally get a weekend alone , I'll call him Bear. Bear was a shep/chow mix. He was not fixed. I was so proud to test out what JB taught me so I could tell him how good I did next time I go over there. So when me and Bear got alone it was outside in a tent far away from the house. They knew I loved camping so it was perfect. I kept all the lights out and I was at a dark part of the woodline so I could see people coming through the moonlight. Me and Bear were sitting there and I touched his cock and he sat up, started wiggling his butt. He knew I was going to jerk him off. I had done it a few times before but not as good as I was going to tonight. I was going to make it spechal. I wanted it to be perfict for him that night...I wanted to try and even suck his dick at some point. I had all the supplies laid out and ready to go. Everything I was doing that night was exactly what abusers do to their victims. I was grooming this dog and I was only 11 or so. I was doing everything gently so nothing was uncomfortable. That night I taught Bear to hold my dick n his mouth and not move. And for that i slowly got my lubed finger in his ass and found the button. He cummed right away the first time. I sucked his dick that night but didn't like it because it tasted like copper so I didn't do that again. That was the thing for a little while just going to JBs and then to my moms the other weekend. One night when me and JB were sucking our dicks he told me about trying to put his dick in Apollo's ass. He said that it didn't work because his dick was a bit big and Apollo started growling so he shut it all down. This made a light bulb go off in my head. I had never even realized you could put your dick in an asshole and it would probably feel just like a pussy... DING DING DING DING I Win. 2 and 2 together equals a live fuck toy. WOW I just solved life. I could not wait till I could get Bear back in the woods. Well about a month later I was back with Bear. Now there are the things that everyone remembers and firsts are the main thing. First kisses, first crush. First orgasm, first time losing your virginity. Well this is how all mine went down. I had never gotten off before. I was only like 10-11 I think. I would get to the point that it would tickle but I would have to quit. Sometimes in the shower I would rub the tip as I held the shaft and as I rubbed the top it would tingle and I would pee. I kinda thought that was it and I just could not do it outside the shower, so I would play with JB, Bear, my stepsister and her big ol titties but I never knew I could stroke it just right. I would always just pass out after I lost my hardon.
I knew this night would be different cause I had a plan. I had Been playing with Bear's prostate so much he would get so excited when he knew what I was about to do. By that time I was using my middle finger to make him cum. He would even push against my finger like he was wanting me to go harder. That night I got the baby oil all on my cock and finger and started using my finger first, Just putting in there and not rubbing the prostate. He started pushing looking for that feeling and I pulled out my finger and pushed the head of my dick against his ass rubbing up and down. It was feeling so good and I didnt have any hands holding him at all. Just one on his back holding his tail up. I pushed just a tiny bit more and felt the head pop in. When that happens I froze. My heart dropped so hard. It was what I would think it would be like to realize the matrix is real. All I could say was this is what it felt like. Bear did not react at all so with my shaky knees I pushed a little bit more. OMG it was so hot in there. 102 feels great on a hard cock. Bear was doing great. I was over half way in and he wasn't moving away, I started thrusting back and forth ever so slightly, saying to Bear he's such a good boy. Then I would freak out like OMG this is what pussy feels like. I reached down to his dick to jerk him off for an old friendly reach around and he was already cumming. When I felt this unbelievable tingle kick in about like the ones I do in the shower when i piss but this was way more emotional. The emotions took over. I barely remembered that it was a damn dog I had my cock in but when that first time orgasm hit me it almost turned me all twisty and inside out feeling. I really didnt know what the fuck was going on i think i even stopped pumping on poor ol Bear. I couldn't do nuthin. I layed down next to Bear and could not move for about what felt like 45 min. All i could do was lay there and think about what i just did and how did i do that ad im such a fucked up bad kid. I felt that I could never do that to anythng ever again. I finally fell asleep and felt normal the next day but now I had a new superpower and realizing i lost my virginity to a dog.
I could not wait till the next time i seen JB to tell him evrything and i even had some ideas of some ways we could get Apollo to let us fuck him. I finally got to spend the night with JB. As soon as we heard Moms door close our underwear was on the floor and we were suckin each others dicks. I told him about what happened and he was proud I got my cock in Bear's ass finally. He gave up on Apollo. He asked if I thought I could try Apollo. So he went and got him. I started doing the normal thing you do when your trying to milk the prostate but I stayed away from the prostate. I told JB that that's how I made Bear back up to me as I had my finger in him and apollo started doing the same thing. I put the astro glide on my cock and went to rubbin my mushroom head in a circle and up and down on his asshole. JB was telling me that this is the time he started growling. I was telling him Apollo wants to get something back in there to rub that prostate so he can cum. JB told me to push it a little more. When I did , the head popped right in. JB was so happy. He told me to go really slow and deeper. I started thrusting a bit more. It felt so hot. JB went to the front and got him to suck his dick at the same time. He kept telling me not to cum yet. He told me to stay there and went behind me. He knew I loved it a couple of times before when he ate my ass out. I squirmed like crazy but this time my hard little cock was still in the dog. He spread my cheeks and punched his tongue right to the fart box. It was crazy good. He kept playing with and licking me back there, It was feeling so good. He started putting his finger in and i didnt mind. He found my prostate and played with it. I told him I think his dick would be too big to go in. He said we just need to make it want it. He said he had a plan. He told me to fuck Apollo a bit faster to get his dick harder. It worked. Then he told me to pull out and get in front of Apollo. He took a blanket and ran it across my back a few times and that made Apollo mount me. He said that now that his cock was big it wont grow inside of me and get stuck. He started to guide him in. By then JB had my little ass wanting something up there. When he got his Apollos hard medium size cock to my asshole I pushed back on it. It went right in about half way. I could feel the pressure on my prostate. Apollo started pumping at a fast speed and JB had to slow him down. It didn't take long for him to finish. Dogs are minutemen. When he got off, JB, was right there, with his hard, ass cock. Like he had been waiting on this. I was like man, I don't think you will fit. Of course he talked me into it but I told him I want to Be on top first to see if I can push it in myself. I was thinking he would have gone too fast or hard at first. So he got on the ground and I squatted over him. We tryed and tried and could not get that big fucker in like that. He suggested that we try it like we did the dog, so he turned me over and got my ass in the air. Lubed me up and slowly stuck his finger in he started on my prostate and then worked away from it. He really did have me pushing to get his finger in deeper. He said “I think you're ready.” He took his dick that was 4 x the size of mine and started rubbing my asshole. He kept going up and down and just like that the fat Mushroom head poped right in. He slowly started to pump it in. It felt like shit. I didn't like it being that big. It just felt like I had to shit real bad. I was like dude this doesn't feel good I want to take it out. He said just give it a sec. It will feel better. So i just took it longer to see if it would feel better but it didn't so i said again “this shit hurts pull it out.” and he's “like no dude I'm almost done it wont take long. And he still only had the head in pretty much. So I gave him another minute...Then he sat up without it coming out and put more lube in his hand and rubbed it everywhere that was dry. Well that was all it needed. That huge fucker slid right in almost to the balls. I put my hand back there to stop him and all I felt was balls. No cock. I said push and told him dude you got to get it out. That shit hurts. He put a guilt trip on me by saying that I got one inside Bear and he's never got one in something that's alive so he's still a virgin and it wasn't fair. As he was saying that he was trying to hurry and get one because he was going harder and deeper and longer strokes. I was like “you cummed in Apollos mouth” but he just kept going. I just held my breath and took it. I was hoping he would cum fast but it felt like it was forever. As i was being rocked back and forth leaned over the coffee table watching the dog lick his own ass and dick thinking about how Bear had cum with me just fucking him in the ass. I bet I could do that. So I closed my eyes and focused on the feeling. I started looking for the feeling of the rubbing of the prostate. So with me holding the table I started really feeling his cock in my ass. Going in and out over and over. It started feeling better and better and better until it felt like my ass could eat anything. And it was. I was pushing back on that cock hard. He whispered to me that he knew I would like it. I started feeling that tingle from down below and started moaning because it felt so good. Started to say “I think i'm going to cum” “i think i'm going to cum” over and over. He grabbed me harder and really started pumping my ass. All of a sudden I started cumming like crazy except i was shooting blanks cause I was too young to wet cum then.. Man that shit felt so fucking good. I could tell by his motion he was getting one also. I did feel strange after that but he acted like I never said stop. But i was like whatever because i guess since i got one i wanted it too.
We still messed around like nothing happened after that. I made sure Lisa didn't come around after that. He was greedy. He would tell me he would let me fuck him up the ass but he had to do me first. Well as soon as he would cum he was done. So I'd go molest the dog and get one. I had other cousins that I would go sleepover with. Some were older and younger. One other older cousin we will call Eddy. Got in a lot of trouble looking in kids windows and stuff. When I would stay over there we would go to this old man's house that would let us smoke. I think he was fucking my cuz and he was only 15. My other cousin that I call Marty would come over to my moms house on the weekends. He was 2 years younger then me but even more sexually advanced then i was. He's the one that wanted to start sucking each others dicks but he didnt like the idea of fucking with a dog so i didnt do it around him. JB really had me hooked on fucking animals. That's all I wanted to do. JB was getting older and hit 18. I didn't see him as much. He would come by and pic me up to go park and fuck everynow and then. That last time I was 16. Then nothing. I was doing my own thing then. In all that time I've done some terrible things because of him. I'll try and remember them all in order. Of course I feel extremely bad for all the precious animals I have wronged. I always made sure I never hurt an animal or ever made one whimper or cry but we don't know if stuff like that impacts them emotionally. I told my ex wife during my first marriage. She was iffy at first but got right into it when she realized something else can fuck her when im out of town. I feel bad for bringing her into that lifestyle. I introduced her sheltered sexy little ass to way too much. Some people can't handle what they don't grow up around. Can't really put it like that though cause Lisa grew up all around it and my sister became a crack hoe at some point. Thats why i blame that stupid bullshit my moms used to say “I’d rather you get fucked up here were i know where you are then you to
be out on the streets” i used to think that was bad ass untill i seen the struggles me and especially my sister Lisa went through. I done my share of different kinds of dope. I like the rush of crack but hate how fast it leaves you. I like the overdrive gear that meth gives me but I don't get to hear the train a comin like I can on a good hit of some crack. I've had so many back surgeries that I hate pain pills now. I've always had a great love and respect for hallucinogens like LSD, DMT, Salvia Divinorum, and peyote type shit but until that shits sold in the stores I probably won't find it. I've never been to rehab or AA because I get tired and burnt out really fast and be done with the drugs the next day. everyone else wants to keep getting more. I would get a call from one of the 100s of cousins I have and they would be happy they got them a $250 yellow boulder on the coffee table about to be chopped up and put in this pipe. I'd be like “On the way, I'll stop by and get me a rose stem to smoke out of, do you need one too” Billy “Fuck yeah get me 5 i know we gunna brake three tonight” so id go over there and get fucked up with him and have a good ol time. He was 32 and I was 17. I think my other cousin that likes the kids i think they was fucking and he told him that we suck each others dicks sometimes. One day Billy called and said he had a fat check and had a $400 rock on the way called Mt Crack rock. I was like here I come. I got there and the guy was just leaving. It was just me and him and when I came in he put the compound on lockdown and locked the doors and gates all behind me. His wife and kids were out of town so no interruptions full crack down, I didn't expect it to last a couple crazy days. It started when he pulled out the pipes and new lighers and said it's in the man cave in the basement. So we took off like little kids. Right away something is different downstairs. Instead of sports shit on and everywhere he had it all blacked out with blacklight and glowing neon signs and stuff with pineapples everywhere. I asked what kind of gay ass pineapple shit is going on. He said “Me and Nicole have been trying swinging for the past year” he said it was going good so I was like let me come. He said he asked but she said im family and a minor so nope.
So we started smoking and I called my grandma to see if my sister Lisa was there yet. She hooked me up the last time someone got her high by calling me over to enjoy so i was returning the favor. She was there but Mom was in for the night and would not bring her so I told her I would figure it out. Well me and him kept smoking and I was like let's go get Lisa. He was like fuck no. I'm too high now. And yeah he was starting to get that tweeking look so we just chilled. He was looking at the nude channels and started talking about how Eddy was in jail for being a peeping tom in some kids' windows. He kept on and on about it and kept leaving the room and coming back with less clothes every time it seemed until he was nude with his little 3 inch dick was out. He came up to me sitting on the couch and grabbed the pipe and took a huge hit. As soon as he was letting the smoke out he was already saying Eddy said you got a pretty good size cock. Right then I knew him and Eddy was sucking dick just like me and Eddy had been. It was a shock to me at first. I didn't ever think he was like that. I think I have just turned 17. Like just a few days before he was 32-33. I was on that shit and it made me horny so I took his little cock in my hand and started to suck it till it grew in my mouth. I was really only 3 inches. And I aint shaming or nothin but I'm almost 8 and when i got up to pull my dick out he was so happy. He latched on like a vacuum. It was fucking nice. We fucked around for a few hours forgetting to hit the pipes as much as we started with. We would fuck each other in the ass and then go clean our dicks so we could suck some more. We started smoking again to recharge. After a while he asked when Lisa was showing up. I had to remind him that she could not get a ride. He was like well fuck lets go get her so got dressed and i drove to the house that was less then a mile away so we was there and back in no time. Before we left to get her he asked if she was cool. I was like yeah you get her high enough and she might strip for us. Now she was only 13 or 14 I think. Could have been 15 though. Me and her were getting high early in life. And she was a hot little petite blonde blue eye girl. But dope got her just because of situations like this. When she got inside he had her a bong and a drink and a crack pipe full of crack. She banged all of it and the crack last. We kept smoking and talking and he put the porn on. I knew what to do to make sure Lisa was comfortable and understood I was cool with everything. I used to do it when we were alone and we knew both of us were horny i would stand up with a hard on under my shorts and you could see it hard and say “It's bedtime”. She would always laugh and start playing with my dick. That was for when we would play house. And it had been years since we played house. I stood up with my hard dick out og my pants and said “I'm going to bed” Lisa busted out laughing and started pulling on my dick. I went to go get another piece off the rock and load my pipe. I melted it onto the brillo so it wouldn't fall off walking back and Lisa done took her clothes off and was laying on the couch. I looked over at him and gave the thumbs up. I hit the pipe and put it down on the table and held it till I got in front of her. It was a huge hit. I started hearing and feeling the train coming. It's like this noise that you can feel in your head when you get a good hit off some crack. I had to sit down Because it was a big rush. I sat down on the couch at Lisa's feet. As soon as I got down she pulled my basketball shorts down to my knees. She started sucking my dick. It felt so strange. Maybe it was that we were really little kids the last we played like this and WOW she got so much better. Billy walked around by the time I was coming out of the train station and coming to my senses. He had a digital camera and was close up on Lisa’s pussy. It was tiny so you really had to get close to see it in that light, It was just a shock to me still trying to process Him being like this was a mind freak. I would have never thought he would of sucked a dick. He really was like an older uncle to us and not an older cousin. He was half bald. It made him look older. Lisa was working away on me and I was like “Damn have you been practicing?” she told me she had been fucking with this 15 yo guy. She said they fucked one and a half times. I guess the “half of a time” he cumed too fast. So that gave Billy the ok to lick his fingers and put one in. I don't know why but that made me a tiny bit jealous. Like if anybody gunna touch my sister it's gunna be me first. So I grabbed his dick and pulled it to my mouth and started sucking the shit out of that hard little thing to get him away from her little precious pussy, i thought, this family had my head all fucked up. But anyway she got up and walked to the table to get her crack pipe and hit it. She came back and sat down and we hit it some more. Billy started going upstairs and looking outside thinking the feds was listening and was kicking the door down because he has two hot little Nude miners with his bald fat ass funny looking self getting them high on crack. Me and Lisa were sitting there getting higher waiting for him to come back. I remember me and her sitting there talking abut the dude she fucked ant i was like “I should be mad someone fucked my sister” then we busted out laughing. I did ask how big his dick was. Like I was jealous of him. That shows how fucked up they had my mind. And she was brainwashed too because she said “I wish your big dick could have been the one to open me up the first time.” We smoked some more and then i put the pipe back down and started playing with her pussy. She laid down and pulled my head down between her legs like she used to when we was really young. It was so fucking tiny. All I could think about was when JB had Apollo licking her little 6 yo pussy back in the day. She had definitely grown some but it didn't seem like much. She was always a tiny girl. She didn't get her first period till she was 16 because of something to do with her size. She always had some plump tits and ass though. As i was eating her out she pulled me up to her and told me If i could PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE go slow and be careful she would let me try and put it in. I looked to the side and Billy was there with the other camera now. This one had the light on it. We sat up before we tried and smoked a few more hits of the bong. Then Billy Yelled action and this big ass bright light came on. I started to eat her again to make sure she was gushing. She always did when I ate her. I started getting my finger in and Billy was right on that with that bright ass shit. I then started rubbing my head on where I thought the hole would let me in. I had never entered a human pussy before. This was my first time. Yeah i'm from mississippi and shes my full blood sister so its about right i was high and horny and really fucked up in the head. Well i didnt want to hurt her at all so i was doing everything i could to make sure she was comfortable. I really wanted to feel what real pussy felt like.
I sat there and rubbed and rubbed and the head slowly started to pop in. She tensed up a bit and i stopped right away. She said go slower so i stopped moving and breathing. I got this far and i didnt want her to tell me to pull it out. This is when I realized that this was her very first time also. I said do you want me to stop? She said “no. I need to learn how to do it, they say it hurts the first time and this opportunity came along and I know you're the last one to hurt me.” My dumbass was like it makes sense. But I just wanted to know what that pussy was like. I started to push it a bit more and more but it was still really tiny. Billy went and got some KY jelly and lubed us up better down there. And yeah he filmed the Lube Job. It worked. I was able to start to slide it in. I could feel her stretching to her limits. She wasn't making any pain sounds so I just slowly kept going back and forth and every time I went forward I would go a bit deeper each time till before I knew it, I was hitting the back wall and was only a little bit over half way in. She was moving away a bit more when I went that deep so I didn't push too much past that point. After that, Billy was jerking off watching us. I was doing everything I could do to hold back and not cum too soon. It got a lot more slippery and she let me go deeper and deeper. I was about to lose it when she started to whisper to me that she was about to get one so I started going a little faster and was back up against the back of her pussy. Billy had his hand all on my ass and worked his way down to her pussy again. GRRR… but he did something to me I liked. When he was down there fondling her pussy as i was fucking it somthing just made me bust one of the biggest nuts i thought i would never be able to live up to again in my life. But news break. 8 months later when I got my first second piece of pussy I could have thought that was the best nut I’d ever busted also.. But I think that everytime I get one though. But Lisa wasn't done with hers so I had to keep pumping on a very sensitive Mushroom head that was already in some of the most tightest pussy in the world but I was a champ. I kept pumping till she stopped squeezing me with her knees. We just layed there trying to figure out what we both just did. I know I felt strange she had to also. Billy came up behind her and was about to touch her when she got up really quick saying she had to go piss. I knew she didn't want him to touch her so I took one for the team. I started towards him to suck his dick even though I was not in the mood since I just got one. I looked at the sheets on the blowup mattress and the new looking white sheets had red streaks and dots and dashes. I was like oh shit we fucked up your shit. Now the crazy thing that he said right off the bat was “Well hell yeah. I'm going to frame it and call it the 14 yo Virgin Blonde Goddess” then he pointed to the TV and all i seen was my 5’ 11” 17yo tall ass trying to fit his whole 8” cock in his 4’ 9” 14 yo sister which was the name of the mp4 we was looking at. He was zoomed in on the sheet when we was fucking. It's like he was ready for it all. Seeing it again really made me start feeling strange. Then all of a sudden I started panicking a bit in my head wondering where she was. And she was taking too long. I went and looked for her and found her coming out of their bedroom. She was like I might have started my period. I had to find a pad. I was like that was probably me that did that. I had to explain to my little Baby 14yo sister that the reason she is bleeding from her vagina is because I had stretched her pussy past the tiny dime size little opening it was the day before and we both were virgins that are probably online somewhere forever. I just started feeling confused. I didn't take care of her from JB when she was 6 and now I invited her over here for this strange ped-o shit. He wasn't peeking out the windows tweaking on the crack. He was up there getting cameras and shit ready. He had been filming me and him fucking also. I gave him gold when I got her there. I so wish I could have gone back and changed that night by forgetting about her. Me and her never did anything like that again after that night. We never even talked about that night again. We didn't talk much after that but I figured she needed her space because it was weird now. But I wasn't there to stop her from getting hooked on everything. I'll never forgive myself.
So nowadays, to entertain ourselves, my new wife and I swing. She's not new, she's been here with me for 10 years but we have a lot of fun. It's something new all the time. I'm going to try some bi sexual shit now. I've done it as a kid but everything Stopped after I turned 17. I got a real girlfriend and that was the only pussy that mattered. No more dudes, no more anything else. Except for the animals I introduced her to. Now that my new wife and I are swinging, that's all we do. No more really wild shit we swing and would like to find a bi couple and swing on a ding-a-ling like the good ol days. Another thing I felt bad about is as an older person I would remember things I would do sexually with my little cousins that were sexual between us and we were the same age at the time. I didn't think anything was wrong with reminiscing about it because i was the same age back then so it was ok to cum to it. It was just a memory. Well I just don't feel right anymore jerking off to a memory of me and my 8yo cousin's little pussys and dicks that I licked back in the day. I'm not that young now so thinking of that pussy made me feel like i was trying to find loopholes. I always thought if i told someone my worries about that then they would think i like 8yos so i just stopped thinking about the sex stuff i did as a kid. I'm still trying to unlearn beastiality. Now that's just a little piece of my story. Telling this much helped bring up other things but I got to stop typing. I'll do more later. But thank y’all for existing
I encourage anyone that can put their 2 cents in. I need all the opinions I can get...
So, let’s just kick this off with a little confession: I never thought I’d be putting any of this down for strangers to read, much less telling another person anything about this. Hell, the fact that I’m even typing this right now is a small miracle. But here I am, spilling my Fuckin guts, and you can thank my wife for that. She’s the one who convinced me to share this, saying something about "healing" and "helping others." I don’t know about all that, but hey, here goes
Now, don’t get me wrong, my wife knows a bit of this story. Not really much because of how she was protected as a kid, and I don't think she could handle the Hard Core shit She’s been with me for ten years now, so she’s got the basics down. But I’m not gonna lie, there are parts of this story even she doesn’t know. Not because I’m trying to keep secrets—okay, maybe a little—but mostly because some of this shit I haven’t even wrapped my head around yet. You know, the real stuff, the stuff you bury deep and don’t let out at the dinner table. The stuff you really only let out because you are so fucking horny and you are okay because you just are....
Before I go there, let’s rewind a bit. I’m 44, been married twice. My first wife and I lasted 17 years, which, let’s be honest, feels like a lifetime. We’ve got two boys—18 and 14—who live down in Mississippi with Her. Then there’s my current wife and our 5-year-old daughter, and just to keep things interesting, she’s got two daughters from a previous marriage, 18 and 15, who live with their other side of the family. My crew and I are here in Kentucky. We’ve been living in Kentucky for the past nine years, trying to keep it all together, which sometimes feels like herding cats, but we make it work.
Up until a few years ago, I was doing a pretty good job of pretending everything was cool. I mean, sure, I had some weird shit happen to me growing up in this little beach and bayou town on the Mississippi Gulf Coast, but who doesn’t, right? I’d shove those memories into the "weird but whatever" category and keep on trucking. Honestly, I didn’t think too much about it. Hell, sometimes I’d even catch myself thinking back and—don’t judge me—enjoying the memories in some twisted way. I've Looked back a lot throughout time and masterbated to what happened to me until i finally realized I was being tricked into being a sex toy and raped. But it was always really fun. Weird as hell, Right?
But then I hit 41, and boom—shit got real. It was like all those memories I’d been ignoring decided to stage a coup and take over. Suddenly, I wasn’t just reminiscing about the past and masterbating to it. I was reliving it, Obsessing over it with the things done to me and the things I feel bad for doing things in the name of getting an unforgettable nut, and let me tell you, it was not the fun trip down memory lane I thought it would be. No, it was more like, Holy shit, how did I manage to shove all this under the rug for so long? The only thing I can think is I’ve been watching my 5 yo daughter growing up and I would lose my shit if anything ever happened to her and when I say that I mean everyone involved loses everything too. This new way of thinking is new to me. I have to protect her. It's really easy to see in all the ladies now that they are all someone's daughter. I believe it's because she is my only daughter and sons are a bit different. I never really worried about my sons like I do my only daughter now. But that was childish thinking on my part because he came to me about a year and half or so ago when he was 17 and told me that his step brothers had messed with him. My whole world fell. I realized I was a fuckin retard.. It happens to boys too. Oh Yeah!!! IT HAPPENED TO ME!!!!!!!!
That's when everything started making sense to me. The stuff I enjoyed when I was young was not just two cousins exploring, playing doctor, learning how to give blow jobs so when you get a girl you will know how to handle a BJ without cumming too soon. (Yeah, I remember him telling me that one time) He taught me a lot of crazy things. Hell, the spoiled little only kid brat was 6 years older than me. I manned up, found the courage and told my son that I understood what he was going through. He was the first person I told that something happened to me and I'm going to have to go back in time and put everything together. I was glad he wasn't holding it back. Something sad that he said that made me blurt out that it happened to me was he said “Dad I promise it wasn't them that made me gay,” I was like Oh no I know it didnt baby because Something like that happened to me and I love the ladies. I feel like I failed him. But we live over 400 miles away. Life sucks and I can't legally go beat up some punk ass kid that did that to him. Probably legal by now but that won't solve it. Healing is a solution though.
And that brings us to now. After 41 years of pretending it wasn’t that bad, I’ve decided it’s time to tell the whole story. All of it. No sugarcoating, no bullshit. There’s going to be stuff in here that’s hard to read—sexual abuse, dark memories, the kind of stuff that makes you squirm. I’m not holding anything back, I'm not sure what y’all will think of some of the stuff i have done in the past. Especially the illegal parts so if you’ve been through something similar, consider this your warning. This shit could get heavy. Well It will get heavy. Trigger this Trigger that, they gunna be flyin all over the place. But for real though. If you get offended because someone forgets to add the trigger warning that sucks. You should expect every story here to be raw. This one definitely will be
I’ve never been good with journals or diaries, because, honestly, I’d die if anyone found them. It would be even worse if they put it back because of shock and didnt say anything to me but just look at me fucked up the rest of my life. Probably call the law on me for some of my thoughts. But this place is right here. I never knew I could tell someone. No one knows who the fuck I am here but you all know what the fuck Ive been through. That feels a little safer. And if sharing my story helps someone else feel less alone, well, maybe that’s reason enough to put it out there. I a lot of y’all stories there was parts in them that would ring bells in my head that would tell me things like “Yep, that's why I think about that” and “Damn he fucking trick me the same way he got done.” I mean did some of these creeps have conventions to learn how to diddle the kiddys.
Getting this out has helped me understand my Hyper-sexual shit my whole life. I pulled and jerked my dick every chance I got growing up. That's the reason why my dick is a good size. I kept it full of blood all the time. This shit explains all my impure thoughts that men should not think. I was always thinking about sex. if it had a hole i would fantasize about fucking it. Especially animals. I'll explain how that happened as we go.
So yeah, I’m not proud of everything in this story, I never thought I could truly tell the whole story to someone. I was seeing a therapist but have slacked off. I couldn't tell her this yet and don't know when or if I could. I don't want to scare the poor girl. I see a psychiatrist because I finally got on some medication that I realized I needed. I never believed in meds before but now I see I needed some my whole life. But she don't fully know. All I told them was I had an older family member mess with me when I was growing up for years. Never went into detail. Them two know and my wife know. Nobody knows exactly how it went down and how it put seeds in my head that warped my thoughts on sex and how it made me think and the things I did because of it. I really wish I could sue for this shit but……Boo Hoo
These are some things I want to figure out from sharing things here. I want to know, why have I been horny my whole life? I want to know why as a kid, I would hope that one of my cousins or my sisters would get horny and start to instigate a sexual little play date?(I expected it at some houses.) And yeah one of my hot step sisters with some big ass boobs was alway horny. Me and my blood sister played also but not as much. Also why is it that when i was left alone for over half of the weekend i would try and plan how i was going to get my moms dog to keep his dick in me for a longer amount of time so i could try and cum through my ass hole before Bear could cum and stop fucking and pull out. Why is it that at the age of 15 I was looking at girls as young as 8 10 and 12 and noticing their shape and how when i look at her hips I could see that she had the perfect definition and amount of fat to body started matching the shape of a grown woman but it was just in a tiny package Bla Bla Bla Bla BLAAA… I used to just go on and on like that in my head till it felt like it would pop.
Throughout my life I have had to question my morality for the things I have done. I know I have done a lot of things to make me feel good in my life. and i think most of the feel good was sex things. I have to make sure I stay within the boundaries of nature, reality, and Ha Yeah IDK. I never stayed within the boundaries of nature. I used to walk around in the fields next door with a flash light during my first marriage. I had red clear plastic taped over the tip of the flash light so it would produce low light that could not be seen less than 100 yards away from me. I would start the night looking for mushrooms to trip on, find um and eat um and then be across the field with my fingers in a female horse pussy feeling it twitch and trying to find the clit, It's a horse from across the way that looked at me funny when I went out to piss in the mornings for a while after that.
I felt so bad when I read all y'alls stories. I ain't cried like that in a good min. And i'll tell the full truth. I found myself getting hard reading some of these horrible stories and that confuses me and makes me feel like I have my abusers mindset. like he was embedded in me because of what he did and how fun he made it all. It was never anything bad. At the end it got BLA and kinda boring so we stopped. I always thought it had stopped because I was 16 and he was like 21. The last time we did something he came to the house and told my stepmom he needed me to help do something. It sounded fun but he just wanted me to suck his dick down the road by the bridge and then bring me home. I was thinking it would be something fun but.. Sorry if it seems like I'm jumpin around. I don't even feel like I really started tellin my story yet. I got to get to the beginnin
I was lucky that i was not done like a lot of the people here that was tied up and painfully beat and raped. I am truly sorry any of this has happened to y'all. We were all babies. What The Fuck Man??. My physical abuse was done by my stepmom and my drunk dad at home. they never sexually messed with us. I loved to get away from home anytime I could. I think that helped make the things happening to me outside the house feel right and felt like a relief to get out. Mostly I would go to my grandmothers on my dads side. Other places were my different aunts that had cousins around our age. My dad and real mom divorced when I was 4 and my sister was 2. My dad quickly met this loony toon bitch that would have a joint in one hand and beat me with the bible with the other hand.
Ok now let's try to start this story. The first sexual thing I ever remember in the beginning of my life was when I was a 2yo. It's the first and farthest memory I have. It's like everything was blurry and it cleared up. I was looking at a red, blue, and yellow tubed bubble pipe. I blew the last of the bubbles and I was out. I guess no one was coming to fix it and I knew that to get it to go you had to pour that shit in there. I looked at my hands and to this day I can see them fat chubby fingers pick up that blue bottle and pour it all the way out on the floor tryin to make it in the pipe. Now I know why I had that pipe and the fresh cardboard ripped packages it came out of on the floor in front of me. Took me years to figure it out but it was a toy someone bought to keep me occupied. When I turned to the left I seen this guy butt ass naked on top of my naked mom. I can remember all the details and I was only 2. The guy had this platinum blonde mullet with a bald spot on the top. Had a big belly and the blonde beard made me think of santa. He had a big belly. I remember seeing the Tiger on the wall that was made out of that black felt material that you painted and would fill in the pic, but the main thing I remember is seeing his dick going in and out of her. It's still cring to me today but i'm letting ya know how much detail i remember. The main thing that I remember is seeing white cum from my moms vag all over his dick (YUCK) on his dick looking the same shape and size as the big blue veins on his dick. I remember thinking that I could imagine what the white stuff feels like to touch.
All this detail was something i just blurted out one afternoon to my step mom at the age of 5-6. I was too young to make up these kinds of details.That might have been because the stuff that started happening to me triggered the memory. The first sexual thing I remember ever doing was with my step sister that's about the same age as me. We had to be 6ish or something. We was in the closet and she pulled her panties down. I touched her and went down and started kissing on her hips workin my way all over but before I got too far the babysitter found us and ran us off. The next things i remember is my cousin. He lived with my grandmother and his mom and dad. The house was a good size. Everyone had their own room. That was my first sanctuary. I could go there for the weekend and not have chores, not get yelled at or hit, and it's where i started to learn how to be a sexual deviant. And like I said. It was always fun and never anything i didn't want to do. He had the gift of gab.. One day I rolled over and started to hump on my cuz, we can call him Jonathan. No that's too long. Let's call him JB. we’ll keep everything anonymous, right? Or protect the guilty? Not sure but i got other cousins im going to have to give fake names too later on, But anyway back to JB and me humping him. Well my uncle was walking by the door and seen what was going on. Well JB can sell pure human shit to a fucking germaphobe. He convinced my uncle that what he seen was me trying to get a nintendo controller he threw. Just think how easy it was to convince me of shit.
He convinced me that genitals and that tingle equals happiness. The first real time I remember playing with JB was when I was about 8 probably. It was going on before that but lightly. Like over the close late at night stuff, but this time was special and very memorable Ill admit that remembering it gets me hard but it feels strange and confusing because not to long ago when i woke up to what he did to me, I was disgusted thinking about this exact scenario. This is what changed my whole life. Not just sex shit but my whole perception of what i thought reality is. I mean he caused me to brainwash myself into thinking it was ok to pleasure and be pleasured by animals as long as you are not hurting them. The night in question was just another fun weekend. Me and my blood sister I’ll call her Lisa was staying at my grandmas that weekend and JB would be there. His parents (my aunt and uncle) would not be there all weekend. We knew it would be a fun weekend and we could do anything we wanted because my grandma , i’ll call her Mom, because thats what everyone called her. I didn't even call my mom mom. My sister and I called her by her name. My step mom would have beat us if we called her mom instead of her. They hated each other. So when it was just me, Lisa, and JB we ruled Mom.
When we got there it was always right after school. When we knew we were going to Moms for the weekend she would be there waiting for us to get there to take us to her house. We always stopped by the store to get some cookies and cream ice cream and other foods we didn't get at home. I remember getting there and asking where my uncle's car. She said they weren't there but JB was. We looked at each other and was like YAY!!!!! Lisa was 6. We walked in and JB was playing a new game he just got. It was top gun for nintendo. We eat and played abit and Mom came in like she always did and told us not to go outside or open the door and JB was in charge. Then she goes back and we here the squeaky door close. The door always gives a great warning that she is about to come down the hall but she never usually comes back out. As soon as the coast was clear JB was like “LET ME SHOW YOU SUMTHING” He had a dog they just got a few weeks ago that was getting obedience training. He brought the dog in and showed some tricks. It was a big ass German Shepherd with some huge nuts hanging. JB was like you want to see something? He pulled out his cock and made the dog be still. Then he put his soft dick in his mouth and the dog didn't move. He said “SUCK” and the muther fucker startes to suck like it was a puppy suckin a nipple. That shit blowed me and Lisa's mind. I couldn't even imagine what she was thinking being only 6. Lisa and I were so fascinated by it. We went over and petted the dog at the same time. He got me to toutch his nuts as he sucked. JB said we could take our clothes off because we would be dress before Mom would open the door and get to the living room we were partying in. me and her stripped so fast and was not sure what was next. I asked if I could do it but he said he wanted Lisa to lay down first and see if the dog would lick her pussy. Well he did. I remember thinkin that her pussy was so tiny that his whole tongue was picking her ass up off the floor every time he licked up. She could not stop giggling. He was making sure we was having fun. And he was only 14 or 15. He knew what he had and what he was doing. Now not too long before that one weekend I spent the night was the first time he gave me a BJ and let me give him one so I was ready for another one and now I know a dog can do it. It was crazy to me.
Lisa started to get way too tickled so she jumped up. Apollo is what I’ll call the dog and he kept trying to lick her. JB stopped him and told me to come here. He said look, watch this first and he started jacking off apollo. He started humping the air and it looked really funny to us and we laughed. His red rocket came out. In my head I was like so that's how it can come out.. Very interesting. My dick was throbbing at that time. And this was pre ejaculation. I had never even cumed before. I was too young. JB latched the dog's mouth right on my cock and I was in heaven. It was the warmest thing ever. I know why now because a dog's normal body temp is 102 degrees all the time. Well I was just there letting the dog do its thing and thinking about how his red rocket came out. JB was on his belly in between Lisa's legs eating her pussy out. I was watching thinking that's where she pees from. But that's the last time I let that bother me the rest of my life. I would watch how he would hold her legs apart as far as they could go and lick and kiss her pussy. The only light in the room was the grayish blue light from the paused Top Gun game we were playing before. Watching them was when I learned that a girl's lips are the opening to the vagina. I could just see the glistening from her juices when he would come up to talk and point out that these juices are a lube that girls naturally made so the dick goes in and out easily. I often wondered if the things he would teach me were coming from his mother. The way they acted back then would explain a lot. He was an only child also. That night i do remember he tried to penetrate us. He started by trying to stick his tongue in Lisa's pussy but it was way too tiny. He got me down there and I tried to penetrate her with my tongue. I got in just a widdle bit. I mean not even enough to count. She was so small. I licked on it for a min while he played with my ass hole. That was the first time someone had ever touched it. He was trying to get it in but I really wasn't in the mood to try. It just felt like I was going to shit. He got me to lay down and had Lisa suck on my dick as he tried to finger her ass. For some reason she was liken it more than I did. She was pushing up against him. She didn't like it when he tried to stick his pinky in her pussy. She said it hurt so he stopped right away. He never wanted us to not like it. He got up and went to his parents' bathroom and got something. He came back with some astro glide, and yeah that's what it was because I remember connecting the name to “ass hole glide.” and a small pink makeup brush. He got behind Lisa again and put the lube on the pink side of the brush. I couldn't see because of the way she turned so I got up to see. He was rubbing it around and started working it in. she let him get a little bit in for about 5 mins. He was so excited that he got up and was thinking he could put his cock in. but she was like ouch, that hurt,. I was about to get mad but he stopped and started licking her ass hole saying, this should make it better. While they were playing I had to go see if I could get the red rocket to cum out. I went to Apollo and started rubbing his cock. He started humping the air and i felt the rocket come out and then it got all wet. JB said you just made him cum. That warm wet stuff is his cum. That just blowed my mind that I just satisfied an animal. I was really confused. I hadn't even had an orgasm myself yet. I had felt like I found a way to thank animals for being such awesome creatures. JB tryed to poke me in the ass a little more by licking my ass whole first but i still didnt feel like i wanted anything up there
I'm not sure about Lisa but I came out a changed person after that night. A hornyer person. A little time went on and I would try to go back to Moms without Lisa as much as I could. Not sure if it was to save her or was it to keep her away from him and save her all to myself. IDK. but me and JB would do all kinds of things together. We always sucked each other's dicks. A lot. Everywhere all the time at the church that his dad preached at. In the back of the car under a blanket that we let the seats down to make a tent to hide in when we went to mobile AL sometimes. They had to know something was up. But… Whatever…Lisa and I went to my real moms house every other weekend. It was a great break from the fire and brimstone environment I was living in during the week. I tried to be at my grandma's house on the weekends I wasn't at my moms. At my moms house I had straight freedom. My moms mentality was “If you're going- to do it, I would rather you do it here” and that meant drugs and everything. The first time I ever tried crack was in Gulfport Mississippi driving around with my mom at the age of 15 as we trying to find a guys house that she knows so we can roll the mOther fucker. That means get his wallet and any drugs. Me and Lisa would help my mom. I'll call her Ruthie. Ruthie would bring us to guys houses and we would keep the kids occupied so Ruth could ether fuck him to get some cash or she would get him fucked up and we would leave with the dudes wallet. The first time I tried meth was when I was 16 and we went and met a biker in mobile and drove all the way back to a shitty roadside apartment on HWY 90 that looks like a crack hotel in Pascagoula. It was me Lisa My mom the snaggletooth dude that got my mom the shit My 14 yo cuz all call him Marty and his girlfriend. So yeah my moms place was fun to me.
. I was about 10 or11 when I was home at my dads house. I was doing the dishes and got horny. I was down petting our female shepard mix and she was all in my face licking me. I started to kiss her and started french kissing her. She got me so fucking horny. The only other person I ever frenched was JB one time. He isn't into kissing but I wanted to see what it was like to do it. It made my dick hard. It did the same thing when I kissed the dog. Later that night when everyone went to sleep I called the dog to me to kiss her again. My cock got so hard that I got up and tried to see if I could stick it in her pussy but my dick was way too big. And I couldn't really push because I wasn't going to hurt her. So I just let her lick my dick till she got tired and walked away. I was wishing she was trained like Apollo. One thing JB did teach me was how to stimulate a male dog's prostate by slowly working in your lubed finger and finding the bump Inside the asshole and how to rub it to make them cum to collect the sperm for their mating business his parents ran for a bit. So my next mission was to get to my moms house. Well I took a month to finally get a weekend alone , I'll call him Bear. Bear was a shep/chow mix. He was not fixed. I was so proud to test out what JB taught me so I could tell him how good I did next time I go over there. So when me and Bear got alone it was outside in a tent far away from the house. They knew I loved camping so it was perfect. I kept all the lights out and I was at a dark part of the woodline so I could see people coming through the moonlight. Me and Bear were sitting there and I touched his cock and he sat up, started wiggling his butt. He knew I was going to jerk him off. I had done it a few times before but not as good as I was going to tonight. I was going to make it spechal. I wanted it to be perfict for him that night...I wanted to try and even suck his dick at some point. I had all the supplies laid out and ready to go. Everything I was doing that night was exactly what abusers do to their victims. I was grooming this dog and I was only 11 or so. I was doing everything gently so nothing was uncomfortable. That night I taught Bear to hold my dick n his mouth and not move. And for that i slowly got my lubed finger in his ass and found the button. He cummed right away the first time. I sucked his dick that night but didn't like it because it tasted like copper so I didn't do that again. That was the thing for a little while just going to JBs and then to my moms the other weekend. One night when me and JB were sucking our dicks he told me about trying to put his dick in Apollo's ass. He said that it didn't work because his dick was a bit big and Apollo started growling so he shut it all down. This made a light bulb go off in my head. I had never even realized you could put your dick in an asshole and it would probably feel just like a pussy... DING DING DING DING I Win. 2 and 2 together equals a live fuck toy. WOW I just solved life. I could not wait till I could get Bear back in the woods. Well about a month later I was back with Bear. Now there are the things that everyone remembers and firsts are the main thing. First kisses, first crush. First orgasm, first time losing your virginity. Well this is how all mine went down. I had never gotten off before. I was only like 10-11 I think. I would get to the point that it would tickle but I would have to quit. Sometimes in the shower I would rub the tip as I held the shaft and as I rubbed the top it would tingle and I would pee. I kinda thought that was it and I just could not do it outside the shower, so I would play with JB, Bear, my stepsister and her big ol titties but I never knew I could stroke it just right. I would always just pass out after I lost my hardon.
I knew this night would be different cause I had a plan. I had Been playing with Bear's prostate so much he would get so excited when he knew what I was about to do. By that time I was using my middle finger to make him cum. He would even push against my finger like he was wanting me to go harder. That night I got the baby oil all on my cock and finger and started using my finger first, Just putting in there and not rubbing the prostate. He started pushing looking for that feeling and I pulled out my finger and pushed the head of my dick against his ass rubbing up and down. It was feeling so good and I didnt have any hands holding him at all. Just one on his back holding his tail up. I pushed just a tiny bit more and felt the head pop in. When that happens I froze. My heart dropped so hard. It was what I would think it would be like to realize the matrix is real. All I could say was this is what it felt like. Bear did not react at all so with my shaky knees I pushed a little bit more. OMG it was so hot in there. 102 feels great on a hard cock. Bear was doing great. I was over half way in and he wasn't moving away, I started thrusting back and forth ever so slightly, saying to Bear he's such a good boy. Then I would freak out like OMG this is what pussy feels like. I reached down to his dick to jerk him off for an old friendly reach around and he was already cumming. When I felt this unbelievable tingle kick in about like the ones I do in the shower when i piss but this was way more emotional. The emotions took over. I barely remembered that it was a damn dog I had my cock in but when that first time orgasm hit me it almost turned me all twisty and inside out feeling. I really didnt know what the fuck was going on i think i even stopped pumping on poor ol Bear. I couldn't do nuthin. I layed down next to Bear and could not move for about what felt like 45 min. All i could do was lay there and think about what i just did and how did i do that ad im such a fucked up bad kid. I felt that I could never do that to anythng ever again. I finally fell asleep and felt normal the next day but now I had a new superpower and realizing i lost my virginity to a dog.
I could not wait till the next time i seen JB to tell him evrything and i even had some ideas of some ways we could get Apollo to let us fuck him. I finally got to spend the night with JB. As soon as we heard Moms door close our underwear was on the floor and we were suckin each others dicks. I told him about what happened and he was proud I got my cock in Bear's ass finally. He gave up on Apollo. He asked if I thought I could try Apollo. So he went and got him. I started doing the normal thing you do when your trying to milk the prostate but I stayed away from the prostate. I told JB that that's how I made Bear back up to me as I had my finger in him and apollo started doing the same thing. I put the astro glide on my cock and went to rubbin my mushroom head in a circle and up and down on his asshole. JB was telling me that this is the time he started growling. I was telling him Apollo wants to get something back in there to rub that prostate so he can cum. JB told me to push it a little more. When I did , the head popped right in. JB was so happy. He told me to go really slow and deeper. I started thrusting a bit more. It felt so hot. JB went to the front and got him to suck his dick at the same time. He kept telling me not to cum yet. He told me to stay there and went behind me. He knew I loved it a couple of times before when he ate my ass out. I squirmed like crazy but this time my hard little cock was still in the dog. He spread my cheeks and punched his tongue right to the fart box. It was crazy good. He kept playing with and licking me back there, It was feeling so good. He started putting his finger in and i didnt mind. He found my prostate and played with it. I told him I think his dick would be too big to go in. He said we just need to make it want it. He said he had a plan. He told me to fuck Apollo a bit faster to get his dick harder. It worked. Then he told me to pull out and get in front of Apollo. He took a blanket and ran it across my back a few times and that made Apollo mount me. He said that now that his cock was big it wont grow inside of me and get stuck. He started to guide him in. By then JB had my little ass wanting something up there. When he got his Apollos hard medium size cock to my asshole I pushed back on it. It went right in about half way. I could feel the pressure on my prostate. Apollo started pumping at a fast speed and JB had to slow him down. It didn't take long for him to finish. Dogs are minutemen. When he got off, JB, was right there, with his hard, ass cock. Like he had been waiting on this. I was like man, I don't think you will fit. Of course he talked me into it but I told him I want to Be on top first to see if I can push it in myself. I was thinking he would have gone too fast or hard at first. So he got on the ground and I squatted over him. We tryed and tried and could not get that big fucker in like that. He suggested that we try it like we did the dog, so he turned me over and got my ass in the air. Lubed me up and slowly stuck his finger in he started on my prostate and then worked away from it. He really did have me pushing to get his finger in deeper. He said “I think you're ready.” He took his dick that was 4 x the size of mine and started rubbing my asshole. He kept going up and down and just like that the fat Mushroom head poped right in. He slowly started to pump it in. It felt like shit. I didn't like it being that big. It just felt like I had to shit real bad. I was like dude this doesn't feel good I want to take it out. He said just give it a sec. It will feel better. So i just took it longer to see if it would feel better but it didn't so i said again “this shit hurts pull it out.” and he's “like no dude I'm almost done it wont take long. And he still only had the head in pretty much. So I gave him another minute...Then he sat up without it coming out and put more lube in his hand and rubbed it everywhere that was dry. Well that was all it needed. That huge fucker slid right in almost to the balls. I put my hand back there to stop him and all I felt was balls. No cock. I said push and told him dude you got to get it out. That shit hurts. He put a guilt trip on me by saying that I got one inside Bear and he's never got one in something that's alive so he's still a virgin and it wasn't fair. As he was saying that he was trying to hurry and get one because he was going harder and deeper and longer strokes. I was like “you cummed in Apollos mouth” but he just kept going. I just held my breath and took it. I was hoping he would cum fast but it felt like it was forever. As i was being rocked back and forth leaned over the coffee table watching the dog lick his own ass and dick thinking about how Bear had cum with me just fucking him in the ass. I bet I could do that. So I closed my eyes and focused on the feeling. I started looking for the feeling of the rubbing of the prostate. So with me holding the table I started really feeling his cock in my ass. Going in and out over and over. It started feeling better and better and better until it felt like my ass could eat anything. And it was. I was pushing back on that cock hard. He whispered to me that he knew I would like it. I started feeling that tingle from down below and started moaning because it felt so good. Started to say “I think i'm going to cum” “i think i'm going to cum” over and over. He grabbed me harder and really started pumping my ass. All of a sudden I started cumming like crazy except i was shooting blanks cause I was too young to wet cum then.. Man that shit felt so fucking good. I could tell by his motion he was getting one also. I did feel strange after that but he acted like I never said stop. But i was like whatever because i guess since i got one i wanted it too.
We still messed around like nothing happened after that. I made sure Lisa didn't come around after that. He was greedy. He would tell me he would let me fuck him up the ass but he had to do me first. Well as soon as he would cum he was done. So I'd go molest the dog and get one. I had other cousins that I would go sleepover with. Some were older and younger. One other older cousin we will call Eddy. Got in a lot of trouble looking in kids windows and stuff. When I would stay over there we would go to this old man's house that would let us smoke. I think he was fucking my cuz and he was only 15. My other cousin that I call Marty would come over to my moms house on the weekends. He was 2 years younger then me but even more sexually advanced then i was. He's the one that wanted to start sucking each others dicks but he didnt like the idea of fucking with a dog so i didnt do it around him. JB really had me hooked on fucking animals. That's all I wanted to do. JB was getting older and hit 18. I didn't see him as much. He would come by and pic me up to go park and fuck everynow and then. That last time I was 16. Then nothing. I was doing my own thing then. In all that time I've done some terrible things because of him. I'll try and remember them all in order. Of course I feel extremely bad for all the precious animals I have wronged. I always made sure I never hurt an animal or ever made one whimper or cry but we don't know if stuff like that impacts them emotionally. I told my ex wife during my first marriage. She was iffy at first but got right into it when she realized something else can fuck her when im out of town. I feel bad for bringing her into that lifestyle. I introduced her sheltered sexy little ass to way too much. Some people can't handle what they don't grow up around. Can't really put it like that though cause Lisa grew up all around it and my sister became a crack hoe at some point. Thats why i blame that stupid bullshit my moms used to say “I’d rather you get fucked up here were i know where you are then you to
be out on the streets” i used to think that was bad ass untill i seen the struggles me and especially my sister Lisa went through. I done my share of different kinds of dope. I like the rush of crack but hate how fast it leaves you. I like the overdrive gear that meth gives me but I don't get to hear the train a comin like I can on a good hit of some crack. I've had so many back surgeries that I hate pain pills now. I've always had a great love and respect for hallucinogens like LSD, DMT, Salvia Divinorum, and peyote type shit but until that shits sold in the stores I probably won't find it. I've never been to rehab or AA because I get tired and burnt out really fast and be done with the drugs the next day. everyone else wants to keep getting more. I would get a call from one of the 100s of cousins I have and they would be happy they got them a $250 yellow boulder on the coffee table about to be chopped up and put in this pipe. I'd be like “On the way, I'll stop by and get me a rose stem to smoke out of, do you need one too” Billy “Fuck yeah get me 5 i know we gunna brake three tonight” so id go over there and get fucked up with him and have a good ol time. He was 32 and I was 17. I think my other cousin that likes the kids i think they was fucking and he told him that we suck each others dicks sometimes. One day Billy called and said he had a fat check and had a $400 rock on the way called Mt Crack rock. I was like here I come. I got there and the guy was just leaving. It was just me and him and when I came in he put the compound on lockdown and locked the doors and gates all behind me. His wife and kids were out of town so no interruptions full crack down, I didn't expect it to last a couple crazy days. It started when he pulled out the pipes and new lighers and said it's in the man cave in the basement. So we took off like little kids. Right away something is different downstairs. Instead of sports shit on and everywhere he had it all blacked out with blacklight and glowing neon signs and stuff with pineapples everywhere. I asked what kind of gay ass pineapple shit is going on. He said “Me and Nicole have been trying swinging for the past year” he said it was going good so I was like let me come. He said he asked but she said im family and a minor so nope.
So we started smoking and I called my grandma to see if my sister Lisa was there yet. She hooked me up the last time someone got her high by calling me over to enjoy so i was returning the favor. She was there but Mom was in for the night and would not bring her so I told her I would figure it out. Well me and him kept smoking and I was like let's go get Lisa. He was like fuck no. I'm too high now. And yeah he was starting to get that tweeking look so we just chilled. He was looking at the nude channels and started talking about how Eddy was in jail for being a peeping tom in some kids' windows. He kept on and on about it and kept leaving the room and coming back with less clothes every time it seemed until he was nude with his little 3 inch dick was out. He came up to me sitting on the couch and grabbed the pipe and took a huge hit. As soon as he was letting the smoke out he was already saying Eddy said you got a pretty good size cock. Right then I knew him and Eddy was sucking dick just like me and Eddy had been. It was a shock to me at first. I didn't ever think he was like that. I think I have just turned 17. Like just a few days before he was 32-33. I was on that shit and it made me horny so I took his little cock in my hand and started to suck it till it grew in my mouth. I was really only 3 inches. And I aint shaming or nothin but I'm almost 8 and when i got up to pull my dick out he was so happy. He latched on like a vacuum. It was fucking nice. We fucked around for a few hours forgetting to hit the pipes as much as we started with. We would fuck each other in the ass and then go clean our dicks so we could suck some more. We started smoking again to recharge. After a while he asked when Lisa was showing up. I had to remind him that she could not get a ride. He was like well fuck lets go get her so got dressed and i drove to the house that was less then a mile away so we was there and back in no time. Before we left to get her he asked if she was cool. I was like yeah you get her high enough and she might strip for us. Now she was only 13 or 14 I think. Could have been 15 though. Me and her were getting high early in life. And she was a hot little petite blonde blue eye girl. But dope got her just because of situations like this. When she got inside he had her a bong and a drink and a crack pipe full of crack. She banged all of it and the crack last. We kept smoking and talking and he put the porn on. I knew what to do to make sure Lisa was comfortable and understood I was cool with everything. I used to do it when we were alone and we knew both of us were horny i would stand up with a hard on under my shorts and you could see it hard and say “It's bedtime”. She would always laugh and start playing with my dick. That was for when we would play house. And it had been years since we played house. I stood up with my hard dick out og my pants and said “I'm going to bed” Lisa busted out laughing and started pulling on my dick. I went to go get another piece off the rock and load my pipe. I melted it onto the brillo so it wouldn't fall off walking back and Lisa done took her clothes off and was laying on the couch. I looked over at him and gave the thumbs up. I hit the pipe and put it down on the table and held it till I got in front of her. It was a huge hit. I started hearing and feeling the train coming. It's like this noise that you can feel in your head when you get a good hit off some crack. I had to sit down Because it was a big rush. I sat down on the couch at Lisa's feet. As soon as I got down she pulled my basketball shorts down to my knees. She started sucking my dick. It felt so strange. Maybe it was that we were really little kids the last we played like this and WOW she got so much better. Billy walked around by the time I was coming out of the train station and coming to my senses. He had a digital camera and was close up on Lisa’s pussy. It was tiny so you really had to get close to see it in that light, It was just a shock to me still trying to process Him being like this was a mind freak. I would have never thought he would of sucked a dick. He really was like an older uncle to us and not an older cousin. He was half bald. It made him look older. Lisa was working away on me and I was like “Damn have you been practicing?” she told me she had been fucking with this 15 yo guy. She said they fucked one and a half times. I guess the “half of a time” he cumed too fast. So that gave Billy the ok to lick his fingers and put one in. I don't know why but that made me a tiny bit jealous. Like if anybody gunna touch my sister it's gunna be me first. So I grabbed his dick and pulled it to my mouth and started sucking the shit out of that hard little thing to get him away from her little precious pussy, i thought, this family had my head all fucked up. But anyway she got up and walked to the table to get her crack pipe and hit it. She came back and sat down and we hit it some more. Billy started going upstairs and looking outside thinking the feds was listening and was kicking the door down because he has two hot little Nude miners with his bald fat ass funny looking self getting them high on crack. Me and Lisa were sitting there getting higher waiting for him to come back. I remember me and her sitting there talking abut the dude she fucked ant i was like “I should be mad someone fucked my sister” then we busted out laughing. I did ask how big his dick was. Like I was jealous of him. That shows how fucked up they had my mind. And she was brainwashed too because she said “I wish your big dick could have been the one to open me up the first time.” We smoked some more and then i put the pipe back down and started playing with her pussy. She laid down and pulled my head down between her legs like she used to when we was really young. It was so fucking tiny. All I could think about was when JB had Apollo licking her little 6 yo pussy back in the day. She had definitely grown some but it didn't seem like much. She was always a tiny girl. She didn't get her first period till she was 16 because of something to do with her size. She always had some plump tits and ass though. As i was eating her out she pulled me up to her and told me If i could PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE go slow and be careful she would let me try and put it in. I looked to the side and Billy was there with the other camera now. This one had the light on it. We sat up before we tried and smoked a few more hits of the bong. Then Billy Yelled action and this big ass bright light came on. I started to eat her again to make sure she was gushing. She always did when I ate her. I started getting my finger in and Billy was right on that with that bright ass shit. I then started rubbing my head on where I thought the hole would let me in. I had never entered a human pussy before. This was my first time. Yeah i'm from mississippi and shes my full blood sister so its about right i was high and horny and really fucked up in the head. Well i didnt want to hurt her at all so i was doing everything i could to make sure she was comfortable. I really wanted to feel what real pussy felt like.
I sat there and rubbed and rubbed and the head slowly started to pop in. She tensed up a bit and i stopped right away. She said go slower so i stopped moving and breathing. I got this far and i didnt want her to tell me to pull it out. This is when I realized that this was her very first time also. I said do you want me to stop? She said “no. I need to learn how to do it, they say it hurts the first time and this opportunity came along and I know you're the last one to hurt me.” My dumbass was like it makes sense. But I just wanted to know what that pussy was like. I started to push it a bit more and more but it was still really tiny. Billy went and got some KY jelly and lubed us up better down there. And yeah he filmed the Lube Job. It worked. I was able to start to slide it in. I could feel her stretching to her limits. She wasn't making any pain sounds so I just slowly kept going back and forth and every time I went forward I would go a bit deeper each time till before I knew it, I was hitting the back wall and was only a little bit over half way in. She was moving away a bit more when I went that deep so I didn't push too much past that point. After that, Billy was jerking off watching us. I was doing everything I could do to hold back and not cum too soon. It got a lot more slippery and she let me go deeper and deeper. I was about to lose it when she started to whisper to me that she was about to get one so I started going a little faster and was back up against the back of her pussy. Billy had his hand all on my ass and worked his way down to her pussy again. GRRR… but he did something to me I liked. When he was down there fondling her pussy as i was fucking it somthing just made me bust one of the biggest nuts i thought i would never be able to live up to again in my life. But news break. 8 months later when I got my first second piece of pussy I could have thought that was the best nut I’d ever busted also.. But I think that everytime I get one though. But Lisa wasn't done with hers so I had to keep pumping on a very sensitive Mushroom head that was already in some of the most tightest pussy in the world but I was a champ. I kept pumping till she stopped squeezing me with her knees. We just layed there trying to figure out what we both just did. I know I felt strange she had to also. Billy came up behind her and was about to touch her when she got up really quick saying she had to go piss. I knew she didn't want him to touch her so I took one for the team. I started towards him to suck his dick even though I was not in the mood since I just got one. I looked at the sheets on the blowup mattress and the new looking white sheets had red streaks and dots and dashes. I was like oh shit we fucked up your shit. Now the crazy thing that he said right off the bat was “Well hell yeah. I'm going to frame it and call it the 14 yo Virgin Blonde Goddess” then he pointed to the TV and all i seen was my 5’ 11” 17yo tall ass trying to fit his whole 8” cock in his 4’ 9” 14 yo sister which was the name of the mp4 we was looking at. He was zoomed in on the sheet when we was fucking. It's like he was ready for it all. Seeing it again really made me start feeling strange. Then all of a sudden I started panicking a bit in my head wondering where she was. And she was taking too long. I went and looked for her and found her coming out of their bedroom. She was like I might have started my period. I had to find a pad. I was like that was probably me that did that. I had to explain to my little Baby 14yo sister that the reason she is bleeding from her vagina is because I had stretched her pussy past the tiny dime size little opening it was the day before and we both were virgins that are probably online somewhere forever. I just started feeling confused. I didn't take care of her from JB when she was 6 and now I invited her over here for this strange ped-o shit. He wasn't peeking out the windows tweaking on the crack. He was up there getting cameras and shit ready. He had been filming me and him fucking also. I gave him gold when I got her there. I so wish I could have gone back and changed that night by forgetting about her. Me and her never did anything like that again after that night. We never even talked about that night again. We didn't talk much after that but I figured she needed her space because it was weird now. But I wasn't there to stop her from getting hooked on everything. I'll never forgive myself.
So nowadays, to entertain ourselves, my new wife and I swing. She's not new, she's been here with me for 10 years but we have a lot of fun. It's something new all the time. I'm going to try some bi sexual shit now. I've done it as a kid but everything Stopped after I turned 17. I got a real girlfriend and that was the only pussy that mattered. No more dudes, no more anything else. Except for the animals I introduced her to. Now that my new wife and I are swinging, that's all we do. No more really wild shit we swing and would like to find a bi couple and swing on a ding-a-ling like the good ol days. Another thing I felt bad about is as an older person I would remember things I would do sexually with my little cousins that were sexual between us and we were the same age at the time. I didn't think anything was wrong with reminiscing about it because i was the same age back then so it was ok to cum to it. It was just a memory. Well I just don't feel right anymore jerking off to a memory of me and my 8yo cousin's little pussys and dicks that I licked back in the day. I'm not that young now so thinking of that pussy made me feel like i was trying to find loopholes. I always thought if i told someone my worries about that then they would think i like 8yos so i just stopped thinking about the sex stuff i did as a kid. I'm still trying to unlearn beastiality. Now that's just a little piece of my story. Telling this much helped bring up other things but I got to stop typing. I'll do more later. But thank y’all for existing
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