Same Old Stuff

[zookeeper]

I had a public function yesterday. I've been on shaky ground lately and so have limited leaving the house. But I felt a little more confident that I could get through yesterday without any problems. I was wrong. I walked into the memorial service and found it was a very confined space and very crowded. While in line, the man behind me demonstrated his lack of need for personal space. He kept putting his hand on my arm and shoulder. I tried to open up space but then would have crowded the person in front of me.

The chairs where small and tightly placed and there was no AC. In the midst, of the service I felt the panic rising and so used all the techniques I could think of without making a scene by getting up to leave. When the end had come, I excused myself to use the restroom instead of the receiving line. I then made a beeline to the parking lot and "escaped". There's got to be a better way to deal with this.

 

[unhappycamper]

If I need to get out of a triggering environment and it's possible to do so, I just get out. Who cares what other people think, or what the occasion is? Memorial services are supposed to make the living feel better, not set off triggers.

I was at an office retreat, and one of the programs was a self-defense lesson with special consideration of female employees who worked in sketchy urban areas. After going through various ways to fight back against physical assault, the instructor said that sometimes get so dangerous and extreme that the woman might just have to stop resisting.

I had to get out, so I did. I just stood outside the building until the session ended. No problem.

Peace!

John

 

[Elad1]

ZK

You did the right thing, no apologies needed. You demonstrated self care and self compassion. Give yourself a pat on the back. The only person that needed an explanation was to yourself and you responded correctly and you honored your needs by politely leaving a situation that caused you pain. Sometimes I practice leaving when I don't need to because it will make it easier to escape a situation when I need to leave a situation. Good job!