Reluctant to post this
Chat has become toxic for myself and a few others I talk to it is triggering rage. We all feel it is effecting us because of our past and events of abandonment. I say I am reluctant to post this as I have had the same problems at another site. It was a mixed site male and female for PTSD. I asked a simple question why do people leave chat without signing off as the chat rules say you are supposed to. I explain that I have problems with being abandoned in my past and this feels the same to me.
The things that effect me are people just disappearing, Or not greeting people when they enter and then the next person comes and everyone greets them. It makes me feel left out. I know for the most part none of this is intentional and that is me and negative assumptions that are the problem
I got a lot of responses some where ok they told me life happens and you have to leave for many reasons, Then the attacks started the final one came from and administrator of the sight telling me it is not their place to be looking out for me get it. I left the sight and went back once to disable my account. I was glad at that time I had met someone from here and he told me there was very little drama of here but the reading was more triggering. I had already join by the time I had left the other site.
I know this is my problem. I have been encouraged by others telling me they struggle the same in chat
I felt the same way when I was 7 or 8 and the primary perp gave me away, I thought I was special and he gave me to 2 guys that hurt me. I felt hurt and abandoned by him. The second came at 13 when my dad kicked me out of the house with nothing and when he found out the next day a cousin had helped me he told the whole family not to help me he was teaching me a lesson. I think the family took it to heart as none have ever helped me and that was 51 years ago now.
I met the worst most violent person I ever met and he would attack me several times over the next 5 years until he was killed in a house fire. The next was in the 80’s I was 29 and my brother was killed on his motor cycle. We were the best of friends he was the one that could make friends and included me. I was also trying to figure out who I was gay straight or what I lost most of my friends but then they weren’t mine they were my brothers. I felt serious abandonment from all of these event and most likely more.
Thanks for reading this. Maybe someone can help me get past this, before I just get cut adrift. I know this is my problem I am airing it here with hope of getting past this
Take Care
Thanks for being here
Esterio
The things that effect me are people just disappearing, Or not greeting people when they enter and then the next person comes and everyone greets them. It makes me feel left out. I know for the most part none of this is intentional and that is me and negative assumptions that are the problem
I got a lot of responses some where ok they told me life happens and you have to leave for many reasons, Then the attacks started the final one came from and administrator of the sight telling me it is not their place to be looking out for me get it. I left the sight and went back once to disable my account. I was glad at that time I had met someone from here and he told me there was very little drama of here but the reading was more triggering. I had already join by the time I had left the other site.
I know this is my problem. I have been encouraged by others telling me they struggle the same in chat
I felt the same way when I was 7 or 8 and the primary perp gave me away, I thought I was special and he gave me to 2 guys that hurt me. I felt hurt and abandoned by him. The second came at 13 when my dad kicked me out of the house with nothing and when he found out the next day a cousin had helped me he told the whole family not to help me he was teaching me a lesson. I think the family took it to heart as none have ever helped me and that was 51 years ago now.
I met the worst most violent person I ever met and he would attack me several times over the next 5 years until he was killed in a house fire. The next was in the 80’s I was 29 and my brother was killed on his motor cycle. We were the best of friends he was the one that could make friends and included me. I was also trying to figure out who I was gay straight or what I lost most of my friends but then they weren’t mine they were my brothers. I felt serious abandonment from all of these event and most likely more.
Thanks for reading this. Maybe someone can help me get past this, before I just get cut adrift. I know this is my problem I am airing it here with hope of getting past this
Take Care
Thanks for being here
Esterio