Puzzled

[Tryingtolive]

My thoughts are like a puzzle.
The events and feelings scattered.
Everywhere.
Not having a clear picture to look at.
No reference.
No Instructions on how to solve my issues.
Silent.
Nervous.
Angry.
Shakened.
Ashamed.
Depersonalized
Sexualized
Confused
Tormented.


In pain with these pieces I can't put together.
I can't express my feelings
But continue to hide some of the pieces to the puzzle.
If I showed them.
Everyone would know.
The backstory to my issues.
As to why Iam the way Iam.
Missing pieces to my own puzzle.
I don't know how to go about solving it.
The pieces I've hidden.
no one searching.
Or knowing.
What I hide.
No one to help me solve them.
Just me and my lost self.
The tightness in my chest never leaves.
Riddled with anxiety.
As I continue to piece together this false self.
Puzzled


A false self I've created.
To maintain
The image
The person
I continue to hide.