lapchinj said:
I started EMDR last week
Back in 90(?) I had a "T" push me into (sorry encourage me to try) cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). He was concerned/convinced that I was "too eager" to volunteer for high risk duties.

Hindsight being 20/20, he was right. It changed how I valued my life. Best of luck with the new track of therapy.
Hey Intochange

It's too early to explain or even say how it's going. Being on antidepressants does not help but the Dr. said that it's worth trying than not. This Wednesday is another session so I hope to know more about the ideas behind it. I want to google it a little later and see what I can come up with

The Dr. that's doing the EMDR says it's really not known how it works but rather that it does work. It's very interesting and I hope to know more Wednesday.

Peace, Rainbows, Love, Healing & Hope
I have heard several things about emdr, good and bad. my therapist wants me to do emdr, but she also says that I am not ready for it yet. she says that I do not have to reexperience the abuse during emdr which is contradictory to what I have read elsewhere. among the things I have read online I have also noted that some experts say that emdr is not effective in cases of long term and repeated trauma. I hope this is not the case. it is my firm hope that you find this technique helpful in your recovery and I would encourage you to share your findings with us.good luck!
Hey Iaccus

I was also exposed to long term abuse at least from the age of 9 until I got out of the USAF around the age of 22-23. I have no memory of my life before the age of nine except that I used to be chased down by my mother. She loves to tell as a joke to people the story of me wanting to run away from home starting when I was three. Isn't that really funny for a three year old boy to ask permission to run away from home?

My T recommended trying EMDR and set me up with Dr to try it out. What the EMDR T told me is that they don't know exactly why or how it works but that it does. The one thing she had to find out was to see if the drugs that I was taking would hinder EMDR process which she told me it will. It seems that taking antidepressents will be a problem but she was willing to give it a try.

We had tried to do EMDR on good memeories that have nothing to do with any part of trauma. She had me hold a vibrator in each hand and the vibrationes were synchronized with headphones left and right. Then close my eyes and try and think of myself in a safe place that we both agreed upon. That really didn't work in that I couldn't get past the beeping and vibrating. But she really didn't expect me to right off the bat. The vibrating sort of reminded me of getting an electric rod shoved up my bottom and turned on. Before the pain set in the rod seemed also to vibrate.

Also it seems that she could have problems getting past the ways I use to protect myself from the past abuses. This might be what you read about long term abuse could hinder the effects of EMDR.

But my regular T who I've been working with the past 4 years saw that I had to do something to get rid of the triggers that set off some really bad reactions. I'm under the impression that I will have to revisit my past in order to get past it with the help of EMDR. But like the EMDR T said that it does not work on everyone. I hope it will because I have trouble walking on the street with other people around me.

I had last week Monday while sitting in a park waiting for my T appointment where two kids around the age of 12-13 pull the hood of my sweatshirt off my head. Nothing bad was meant but rather runnig around having some fun. That T session didn't go well at all. My mind was blank and I couldn't talk about anything. It took me all of Tuesday and part of Wednesday to unwind. When I went to my EMDR T last week Wednesday I already knew what set me off and I told the T. Tomorrow I will tell my regulr T why I couldn't talk last week. But after that whole episode I was hugging the storefronts and building walls so that my right arm wasn't on the road side where someone could come along and abduct me again. Very paranoid at the moment, I'll have to see what will happen tomorror when I go back to the village.

I hope to know more about the EMDR af my session Wednesday

Love & Peace
Hey iaccus

EMDR is a mixed bag with me. I get too triggered talking about somethings. Some things got better but I'm still haunted by some of the things I was involved in. It is worth a try but you will be talking about memories that hurt. My Dr. has to work with me so I won't get triggered. I have times where I feel like running out of the office.

Finding out that I was adopted was a kick in the ass but I'm glad I'm not related to them. They made sure that nobody will mention to me that I was adopted. A friend here on MS sent me an ancestry.com DNA test kit. It turns out that all my lineage is Scandinavian totally from Norway and not eastern Europe where their lineage is from Romania and Ukraine. So my doctor would do EMDR on this instead of my more triggering parts of me. It's been two years with her and my it has helped in that I can talk more about my past. I still don't fully understand what is supposed to happen. They all talk about easing the pain but it doesn't work for everyone and I'm scared it won't work. Some people get relief the first or second time.

I have an EMDR tomorrow in the morning so if you're interested I'll post the results. Try it maybe it will work. Especially if you're wondering if you should or shouldn't do it.

gotta get some shut-eye. I just finished a 5 day week with 73 hours at work. Try it otherwise you'll never know,

Sending my love


Peace, Rainbows, Love, Healing & Hope