PLEASE! pray for my family

victor-victim

Registrant
my 8 year old cousin/niece is dead.
the police say she was murdered.
the mother has been charged.
my family is in shock.
i have no details.
don't really want to know.
a child is dead. that is enough for now.
will need some time to absorb and process.
still not feeling anything, thank god.
cried once.
my sister is crying lots.
 

tbkkfile

Registrant
Dear Victor

My heart goes out to you and your family and I'm sending my love and support to you all in this awful time.

We maybe thousands of mile apart but you're all right here in my thoughts.

Take good care of yourself

David
 

woodenshoes

Registrant
Victor-victim

I'm truly sorry for your lose. I hope you find the answers you need to heal.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Ws
 

victor-victim

Registrant
grateful.
thanks david.
kind words appreciated.

the suffering has only begun.
most of us are still wallowing
in the luxury of shock and denial.

like watching a bad dream on a video screen.
but this is a horror movie nightmare.

it feels wrong.
it feels bad.
it doesn't make sense.
so it can't be true.
but reality refuses to disappear
when the eyes are shut.
it doesn't vanish simply
because i deny it.
this ugly crime does not require my consent.
it is now historical fact that exists
whether i believe it or not.

powerless and pissed off.
 

victor-victim

Registrant
thank you, ws.
much needed.
please pray for the parents.

pain is only a word.
reality is so much worse.

i wish i could do more for them.
i can only comfort those closest to me.
 

Still

Registrant
Such a dramatic shock and tragedy.

I grew up in a home that lost two of my sisters. One was a sudden accident (34yo), and the other, an aggressive 12-hour virus (3yo) and medical malpractice. Neither were a deliberate crime like your situation.

I cannot imagine the horror and pain in your family right now.

This sort of pain is far beyond the beyonds. You have my prayers.
 

victor-victim

Registrant
we, the family, have litlle or no clue if there has been a crime.
still waiting for facts and details and documents.
people directly involved are unavailable or in shock.
mourning has not even begun yet.
trying too hard not to talk about it,
we are mostly carrying on with busy schedules,
keeping life from unraveling in chaos.
a great feeling of impotence and collective guilt.
"what could i have done to predict and prevent this?"


thanks for your kind words, Still.
 

victor-victim

Registrant
thank you, CJ!

please pray for us.
no matter how far you are.


prayer knows not duration nor distance.
god created time and space,
we can experience eternal existence.
god gives his glory and grace.
we can feel his omnipresence.
gaze upon his loving face.
pray for wisdom, peace and patience.
god, forgive the human race.
 

victor-victim

Registrant
had to start sorting out my thoughts and feelings.
as usual. i write them down in rhythm and rhyme all the time.
i think it helps me connect the dots.

posting them in poetry section...

http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=473496#Post473496
 

victor-victim

Registrant
i feel like i am in a movie.
watching my own life.
not connected.
above it all.
untouched.
detached.
beyond.
safe.
ok.

the storm rages outside.
incomprehensible news.
the headlines scream.
a murdered child.
makes no sense.
i can't read it.
i want truth,
not stories.

in my mind,
all i see
is a little girl
playing in the park
on a blanket
at a picnic.
green grass
under blue sky
and golden sun.
a moment.
eternal.
gone.

what can one learn
in eight short years?

it doesn't feel real.
it doesn't seem right.

life is illusion.
chaos. confusion.
trauma. tragedy.
words seem empty.
how could mother
murder daughter?
please, somebody,
pray for my family.
 

OCN

Registrant
Jeez Victor..
This is shocking to read! I really hope you and your family will be able to come through this alive and well. What a tragic loss..

May you and your family find a little peace in these troubled times!! You're in my prayers!

P
 

victor-victim

Registrant
it is shocking to read.
i cannot believe what is already written.

your prayers will be heard.
of this i am certain.

thank you, OCN.

send your love to the parents.
may god protect those in pain.

my sister and her husband and children are my main concern.
they are directly involved and affected.
 

victor-victim

Registrant
we are all still holding our breath.
total silence.
i get scolded every time i ask questions.
we did not see any of that side of the family.
there were no gatherings.
total disintegration of tradition.
each clique and individual "celebrated" seperately.
we stuck together as a nuclear unit.
me. wife. three kids. with a short visit from opa.
we also dropped in on a lonely old aunt,
one of the last of the elders.
she just lost a baby grandchild about a month ago.
very sad, a tragedy, but not a murder, at least.
her son and daughter both died years ago,
also from natural causes,
but she stays upbeat and spiritual.
quite a positive person.

i guess being blissfully ignorant and unaware of
the murder investigation/trial lurking in the background has helped us all deal with this christmas holiday season in a "normal" fashion.

i don't like it.

when something like this happens,
people should talk about their feelings.
if we just continue on with life,
like nothing happened,
after a child has been killed,
that seems all wrong to me.

i am wondering how long this will continue.

i will pray for the mother and father again.
i will pray for those who love and mourn the child.
this loss cannot be measured.


the autopsy results are so far "inconclusive".
the mother has been deemed "unfit" to stand trial.
 
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