October, 1976
*** Possible Triggers ***
While my ship was deployed in the Western Pacific, we had a home port while we were there. It was Subic Bay, in the Philippines. Just offshore, there was a recreation island for the Navy, Grande Island. It was never staffed. It had a barracks-like building and not much else. But the waters were warm and full of exoctic fish including tiger sharks.
I went there one weekend to snorkel and relax. I loved swimming.
On Sunday night, as I was sleeping face-down, I got attacked by five guys, who held me down, as each one of them raped me. Saying things like "isn't this what you want faggot?" And "you had this coming." and "you have to die now, you know that, right?"
After it was over, I stumbled into the showers, bleeding profusely, and feel down the wall as the water washed over me and just cried. I was so ashamed. Even though I knew logically I could not fight off so many guys, I beat myself up for not doing it. I banged my head against the wall until I started bleeding. I have no idea how long I was in that shower.
The next morning, I stood on the rocky shore waiting for a boat to take me to the mainland and knew I could never tell anyone what happened. When I got to sickbay to have my head looked over, I told them I fell down and hit a rock. I never told them I was still bleeding in my underwear. After that, my naval career went so downhill that I never received another promotion. I wonder why.
While my ship was deployed in the Western Pacific, we had a home port while we were there. It was Subic Bay, in the Philippines. Just offshore, there was a recreation island for the Navy, Grande Island. It was never staffed. It had a barracks-like building and not much else. But the waters were warm and full of exoctic fish including tiger sharks.
I went there one weekend to snorkel and relax. I loved swimming.
On Sunday night, as I was sleeping face-down, I got attacked by five guys, who held me down, as each one of them raped me. Saying things like "isn't this what you want faggot?" And "you had this coming." and "you have to die now, you know that, right?"
After it was over, I stumbled into the showers, bleeding profusely, and feel down the wall as the water washed over me and just cried. I was so ashamed. Even though I knew logically I could not fight off so many guys, I beat myself up for not doing it. I banged my head against the wall until I started bleeding. I have no idea how long I was in that shower.
The next morning, I stood on the rocky shore waiting for a boat to take me to the mainland and knew I could never tell anyone what happened. When I got to sickbay to have my head looked over, I told them I fell down and hit a rock. I never told them I was still bleeding in my underwear. After that, my naval career went so downhill that I never received another promotion. I wonder why.