More Memories

More Memories
B

Broken

Registrant
I remembered my mom worked as a teachers aid. In class, with me. If i wear speaking my voice would be shaking right now. My body is shaking a little. Maybe it wasnt the teacher, maybe it was her. How much more fucked up can this get? Cmon man, im close to ready, start laying it on me. What was so bad? I have PTSD for sure now, and im so hyper vigilent i alost feel like a speed freak going paranoid schizo. It is because i havent slept, but it is a little scary anyways.

PS you know how little pleasent reminders and after thoughts end up here? Not this time. My mom once said my oldest brother Jimmy, while he was staying with us, ODed on herion in front of me when i was 5. The ambulance came and saved him, but i dont remember that at all.

Its funny almost, i feel like i should yell "INCOMING!!!"
 
Broken,

I hope your keeping a journal, it helped me a lot, just writing down the bits and pieces as they come in and adding to them as it develops. It helped clear my mind some cus my brain somehow realized that when i wrote them down it did not have to keep track of them so much, anyways, just a suggestion.

As for yelling "incoming" oh i know that feeling!

Hugs,

John
 
Broken,
John has it right here about the journal...if you can't remember and are havig a hard time putting it together...got to start a journal...if you ever find a good therapist or get put inside...they will surly have you start a "JOURNAL"....check out any nut house and the inmates well ALL be "JOURNALING" !!!!

Eddie
 
Broken
The words in front of you start to make more sense, stopping to think of the meaning of a word, making sure the sentence conveys exactly what you mean is a great excercise in putting your thoughts in order.
It's also good to look back at, to see what worked and what didn't. You might notice a pattern of behaviour- good or bad - that you might not have otherwise noticed.
Personally I never found it triggering to a bad extent and the good certainly outweighed the bad.

And you do have a talent with words, try it- you might like it.

be strong
Lloydy ;)
 
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