Making it look easy

Making it look easy

ak

Registrant
I am starting to see things about healing, about getting better then all this. It is about making it look easy. In the sport I do, it is matter of doing just that. To make it look easy. To make it look like anyone can get out there and do the same things. To make it look like art, more then effort.

I have two friends in this sport that I am very close to that I know do that well. No matter what there is with mental or emotional pain, both these people, they can 'turn it off' and make things look easy when in practice or performance or competition.

I think it is same in healing. There are people who have been with healing so long, it is hard to imagine they once have been where I am in my head, that they have once felt what I do, and have the fears and nightmares and things I do. It is just like with my sport, it is people who have been 'practicing' and working at this for much longer. We do not see them in weakness, even if still they have them. They show the good, the way we can be, the strength and acceptence and dealing with things. But, I do remind myself, they have been where I am, when they start. They do have the nightmares and walk in sleep, they do have the fear, the panic, the bad feelings of themself. Sometime maybe they still feel it. But they do no feel it as often or as strongly as it once was.

They are the champions of this healing, just as sport has it's champions. They are the ones who rise to top of the negative and maintain their positive. People like the moderators here, who have healed so much themselves, they can make it look better and more able for us to do the same.

Thank you, for making it look easy. I know it is not. I am no stupid. But thank you for making it look like, just with sport, as I practice more with it, I can find success with it also. I know how much success depend on how much work. I am not afraid to work, I will work hard. But sometime, specially in recent four, five months, it have seem it don't matter how much I work, I go no where. Now I know that it is not standing still. I still move forward. It is only my steps are smaller. But that is all right. It is not the size of the steps that matter. It is only that we are facing in right direction.

Andrei
 
Andrei I am stunned by your post. How simple and beautiful and entirely dead on correct.

Nothing is worse than trying to do something that you think is impossible to begin with.
 
I appreciate what you're saying. There's the long tunnel with a light at the other end. Some have made it to the far end and even out the other side. I would never go so far as to say it's easy--even on the other side. There may be more good days than bad, maybe even more good years than bad, but the walk never ends. Not to sound depressing! I just don't want anyone here to think that just because it's not easy yet, we haven't made it to a good place. We have. We've made it here.

Keep up the fight.
 
Andrei, I was where you are today, we all were.
We all see the pain you are going through. You excel at sport because you strive to be the best in the World, and always be positive, because you can do it.

Toning your mind with anything postive is a boost to your well being.

I myself used to be an inline skater, I had such good skill and speed, it is like a drug when you are doing it.

You will get so much better in time, but just be positive, it seems impossible where you are today, but each day you will be stronger.

You will fall sometimes, but you will get back up and survive, we all did,

ste
 
Andrei - I remember some of your very cautious first postings here. I know that one of your very good friends encouraged you to come here and find the support that is available.

I can tell that you are growing in confidence each time that you post here. You may think that you are gaining small steps, but I can see some quite large ones.

I wish that I could write/speak a language other than my mother tongue in the way that you now can. Rememeber when you used to apologise because you thought that we would not understand you.

It takes a brave man to post here for the first time...I think that you were more than brave when you took that first step.

Continue your journey and take whatever size steps you need to.

I wish you well ...Rik
 
Andrei, I am just amazed by your modesty. I recognize that you have your struggles, but very few of us are able to deport ourselves with your grace, determination and dignity. To borrow your metaphor, I would suggest that you are champion in two avenues of your life, sport and healing.
Peace, Andrew
 
Andrei,

I think that from the outside, without the knowledge of what it takes to achieve it, everything looks easy when someone who has gone through the hard work and practice does it. I've been through a lot but I'm still here, was it easy, no. Am I healed, no. Am I still on the path to healing, YES! I feel better about myself now, I have compassion for myself now, I accept myself now.

This is a very powerful topic. Thank you for starting this thread.

Steve
 
Knowing the struggles and fears you still deal with, as usual, your courage and wisdom overwhelm me, my friend. This is just another example of what an invincible person you are. Thank you for putting into words, such simple but important concepts. I think you are exactly right. The more we do anything, the easier it will get. The more we practice positive things, the easier they will get as well. I hope that everyone here will continue to make the effort, practice the positive, and take the steps in the right direction.

Leosha
 
If I might expand upon want Andrei talks about from a different angle:

In martial arts (or any endeavor, for that matter), you wish to achieve what in zen is known as the state of "no mind". i.e., everything that you have practiced and thought and sweated about comes completely natural and without effort. You do not have think consciously at all about what your body is doing. This is why you do kata over and over and over and over again. The more your do, the more secrets are revealed and the more automatic it becomes.

In my case, I had achieved that state by denying my abuse had caused my any harm at all. I had become a "Master" of automatic denial. I would even tell myself that it had been good for me. This allowed me to function in society without anyone (including myself) relizing how screwed up I was.

Now, I am trying to turn it all upside down and "master" a new life. I think that it is what we all seek: The peace and harmony of life without the guilt, fears, confusion, and doubts that SA has brought upon us.

I use my T as a counselor, but I get much more benefit from this site than from any other source (other than my family of course).

Didn't mean to make this so long and rambling, just hope you guys understand what I mean.
 
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