Made my Decision

Made my Decision
K

Kieran1

Registrant
After a long uphill battle,I am going to tell one of my best friends about the abuse I went through so many years ago. We are going to meet for lunch this week,although he doesn't know what I want to talk about. This is a "HUGE" step for me as I have only told my wife,therapist and Drs. about that terrible time so many years ago. I do not know how I am going to start telling him,but I hope that I will keep myself together long enough to say the things I want to tell him.I need him to know so he can help me in one way,in another I hope it will lift a huge burden from my shoulders.I am nervous and get upset at times but I will go through with!

Please guys,think of me while I make this big step.

Thanks,Kieran
 
Kieran:

You are in my thots, prayers, best wishes.

What you are doing is a huge risk for a male survivor to take and shows a lot of courage & determination to heal & be whole on your part. WTG!

This oft-referred to article by Ken Singer may help...

https://www.malesurvivor.org/articles/singer3.htm

Victor
 
This is huge. If you are to some degree certain that your disclosing will not revictimize you, it will be a most freeing thing to do. I have shared my story with a number of friends. Having done so, I feel freer, more my Self, more spontaneous. All have been very receptive and supportive, but then again, I shared with those whom I thought would be supportive. Nevertheless, it is daunting to break new ground. Good luck. I will be thinking of you. Please let us know how it goes.

James
 
Wow! I wish you lots of good luck. I don't think I am at that stage yet. Even my uncle, who I live with, does not know about most of what I went through.

I hope this will bring you closer to your friend, and help you feel better that you are letting it out in the open. Good luck! :)
 
Kieran,
To echo everyone here, this will be a hard thing to do. But it gets much easier after you do it once. And, yes, freer is a great way to describe it. Good luck and my thoughts are with you.
mike
 
Kieran
to tell someone you trust is about the most rewarding thing we can do.

But I will say one thing, don't be dissapointed if you don't tell him. Just enjoy lunch and his company.
I think something inside us tells us when it's "right" to tell, and I've often planned to tell someone but backed away. But I did tell them some other time, when it felt right.
Please don't let me put you off though, we're all different and that might just be the strange way I do things !

Once you've told someone it's no longer a secret, and that's a feeling hard to beat.

Dave
 
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