Love
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Love
- Thread starterdesvelar
- Start date
I never really have known who i am I am always changing myself to be somethign different.
I always halp others wiht everything. My specialty is sucide, rape and abuse. It is a mystery to me why I do help sometimes. Sometimes it feels liek another me is doing the help. I helped a great many but not myself.
i do even know who I am. I define myself with fancy words or poetic meanings like Lost Puppy, Social Engineer.
the girl I fell in love with is but 13 and I am 17 we both will be going a year up soon and yes our love seems on but it is what keeps her and I alive. she has a very bad psat oof rape and her last love killed himself shw as born in the ukrane and her dad walked out on her when she was 4. she was raped alot by her mum roomate.
and I have helped her with her probalems and grew to love her she loves me and she helps me also she makes sure I dont think of killings myself she makes sure I eat right and that I get enough sleep. we play and do lotstogether her mom knows where in love as of late and she is just happy that kristian has someone to love becuase she never did. but her mom calls her fat and dum and must be all proper she does this even when I am around and it gets to kristinas head.She would killherself if I asked and her love is undying to me and if i where to go she would also but I sometimes wonder if she is just another person i am helping or if it is more she has helped me with alll of my problems . Includign my man whoreness that i used to be. If things where to go wrong we would move to canda and try to live thier but if all else fails we would kill ourselves by jumping of a high tower. I was a lost puppy til i found her and I dotn feel so lost anymore. I am not even sure of my past though like even if my rape was real it dfeels so real i can feel it in my mouth and yet it almost feels fake. some of it kristina and my relatesionship was based off of but we talkedabout it and she doesnt care she still loves me becuase I am the only one for sher she says and I care for her.
I always halp others wiht everything. My specialty is sucide, rape and abuse. It is a mystery to me why I do help sometimes. Sometimes it feels liek another me is doing the help. I helped a great many but not myself.
i do even know who I am. I define myself with fancy words or poetic meanings like Lost Puppy, Social Engineer.
the girl I fell in love with is but 13 and I am 17 we both will be going a year up soon and yes our love seems on but it is what keeps her and I alive. she has a very bad psat oof rape and her last love killed himself shw as born in the ukrane and her dad walked out on her when she was 4. she was raped alot by her mum roomate.
and I have helped her with her probalems and grew to love her she loves me and she helps me also she makes sure I dont think of killings myself she makes sure I eat right and that I get enough sleep. we play and do lotstogether her mom knows where in love as of late and she is just happy that kristian has someone to love becuase she never did. but her mom calls her fat and dum and must be all proper she does this even when I am around and it gets to kristinas head.She would killherself if I asked and her love is undying to me and if i where to go she would also but I sometimes wonder if she is just another person i am helping or if it is more she has helped me with alll of my problems . Includign my man whoreness that i used to be. If things where to go wrong we would move to canda and try to live thier but if all else fails we would kill ourselves by jumping of a high tower. I was a lost puppy til i found her and I dotn feel so lost anymore. I am not even sure of my past though like even if my rape was real it dfeels so real i can feel it in my mouth and yet it almost feels fake. some of it kristina and my relatesionship was based off of but we talkedabout it and she doesnt care she still loves me becuase I am the only one for sher she says and I care for her.
roadrunner
Registrant
Desvelar,
Welcome back - it's been a long time. I'm glad your relationship with your girlfriend is still strong.
When I first saw your post earlier today I wasn't sure how to reply. I guess you can imagine I noticed the frequent references to suicide. That concerns me, and I can see it's something that troubles you as well. I have been thinking how to respond.
There are lots of things that can and should be said to an abused teenager such as yourself Desvelar, but I think the most important thing for you to think about is this. Talk of suicide if and when a relationship fails suggests a feeling of being lost and doomed, with only this one thing - your relationship with your girlfriend - to make life seem worth living. But in fact YOU are a worthwhile person and YOUR life is worth living, even if that isn't clear to you right now. Soemtimes our troubles get ahold of us and a lot of things seem to be confused and doubtful. But this one is carved in stone. The life of EVERY abused teen can be reclaimed. You can recover and lead the happy fulfilling life that everyone deserves. Yes, it's sometimes hard work, and yes, sometimes it's difficult. But you can do it.
I think you also need to bear in mind that you are a worthwhile person in and of yourself. Your importance as YOU, and the importance of your future and life, don't depend on anyone else. I have been married to a wonderful women for 25 years now, and I love her with all my heart. If I were to lose her for whatever reason I know that would hurt terribly. But the importance and value of me as Larry would not be diminished in any way.
The same applies to you and your girlfriend. It's great that you two are together and that you love each other. But that relationship builds on worth and value that you both have already; it doesn't create worth and value where none existed before. Zero times two is still zero.
On top of that, the future welfare of your relationship depends on how you look to your future and plan things positively together. It depends not on desperation, a feeling of "I could never carry on without you", but on commitment. What each of you need to see is how your happiness together is somehow more than the sum of your happiness separately, if you get what I mean. In a genuine and healthy relationship the two partners call on their own value and positive feelings and devote them to the other, for the sake of their happiness together. No one in the world owes it to another to say, or feel, that the importance of their own life would be cancelled out without that other person.
Much love,
Larry
Welcome back - it's been a long time. I'm glad your relationship with your girlfriend is still strong.
When I first saw your post earlier today I wasn't sure how to reply. I guess you can imagine I noticed the frequent references to suicide. That concerns me, and I can see it's something that troubles you as well. I have been thinking how to respond.
There are lots of things that can and should be said to an abused teenager such as yourself Desvelar, but I think the most important thing for you to think about is this. Talk of suicide if and when a relationship fails suggests a feeling of being lost and doomed, with only this one thing - your relationship with your girlfriend - to make life seem worth living. But in fact YOU are a worthwhile person and YOUR life is worth living, even if that isn't clear to you right now. Soemtimes our troubles get ahold of us and a lot of things seem to be confused and doubtful. But this one is carved in stone. The life of EVERY abused teen can be reclaimed. You can recover and lead the happy fulfilling life that everyone deserves. Yes, it's sometimes hard work, and yes, sometimes it's difficult. But you can do it.
I think you also need to bear in mind that you are a worthwhile person in and of yourself. Your importance as YOU, and the importance of your future and life, don't depend on anyone else. I have been married to a wonderful women for 25 years now, and I love her with all my heart. If I were to lose her for whatever reason I know that would hurt terribly. But the importance and value of me as Larry would not be diminished in any way.
The same applies to you and your girlfriend. It's great that you two are together and that you love each other. But that relationship builds on worth and value that you both have already; it doesn't create worth and value where none existed before. Zero times two is still zero.
On top of that, the future welfare of your relationship depends on how you look to your future and plan things positively together. It depends not on desperation, a feeling of "I could never carry on without you", but on commitment. What each of you need to see is how your happiness together is somehow more than the sum of your happiness separately, if you get what I mean. In a genuine and healthy relationship the two partners call on their own value and positive feelings and devote them to the other, for the sake of their happiness together. No one in the world owes it to another to say, or feel, that the importance of their own life would be cancelled out without that other person.
Much love,
Larry