Just found out....

onedaysoon

New Registrant
I have kind of known all along that my husband has been sexual with his mother but it finally came out that he started sleeping in her bed when he was about 8 or so and slept there until 12/13 yrs old- just those two slept in the bed together. Now, he didn't just sleep there, apparently things happened etc. As far as I can see that's molestation.....has anyone reported a parent before??? Did they report or confront them, and what happened??? Thanks for anyone's comments!!
 

Hidden15

Registrant
Welcome to MS onedaysoon,

i guess the one thing you need to realize is you cant rush this on your husband, this needs to be solely his choice, the one thing i hate is being treated differently to everyone else, so i didn't tell anyone about what happened for 10 years! i was abused the same age as your husband it started when i was 8 and didn't stop until i was 16, i was to abused by my mother. you're meant to love and trust these people, you believe anything they will say to you, you're far to young to understand this is wrong. i have never reported either of my parents, posting my story up on this website was the biggest step i have made, i have wanted to go to the police but in all honesty i am not strong enough and i know that. living in denial is my way of dealing with this, but i'm becoming to settle in here in the arms of MS, i guess the one thing you need to do is make sure your husband realizes this was not his fault, he done what he needed to do to survive, as did i, and many others on this site. Dont treat him any different, personally that's the biggest thing, he is not alone, and neither are you. As your name says, one day soon.. it will be ok.

take care,
Chris
 

onedaysoon

New Registrant
I know its terribly difficult. That's kinda why I'm asking about it. It has to be- my husband has admitted to other abuse but its taken years for him to admit this. I know the goal of the abuser is to get the abused to believe its their fault. Its a sick secret cycle. I'm now glad I went by my gut and have never left our children alone with her.

I'm soooo mad at her I could scream!!! But I know it would do no good and she'll just deny it. I will try my best to not treat him differently. However, its hard when he treats ME differently- as though i'm his mother:(.....i guess one day soon i won't be.

Thanks for the response!!:)
 

wes-b

Registrant
Welcome my sister;

Glad you are here. You sound like you are working hard to support and accept you husband where he is in his recovery and healing. He is fortunate to have you in his corner, I too have treated and related to my wife as if she were my mother... This pains me as I have memories surface, mine were before age 4 and not "sexual", they were hateful and rageful toward my being a boy yet were still sexual abuse. I have been changing and healing and less and less do I treat/relate to my wife as "my mother", this does change as I heal.

I pray you see through your brothers and sisters on MS that there is hope and healing :)

Love Wes
 
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