Jesus Christ Superstar

Jesus Christ Superstar
I have been getting into the habit of asking myself questions about long standing curiosities. You know, those strange but persistent oddities. The ones you’ve long ago brushed off with an accepting shrug.

Ever since I was a teenager I have been obsessed with Jesus Christ Superstar. I’ve been a well adjusted agnostic since I was about 11. How does this telling, of this story fit so perfectly in me? I knew it wasn’t a subconscious yearning for faith. I was OK with my place in the universe. Yet Superstar has always brought me to tears.

Last night while washing up “Gethsemane (I Only Want to Say)” slipped into the shuffle. I switched to the full album and relished every word. It was time to ask why.

I am astonished by how quickly answers emerge when you actually engage with the question. I’ve read directors have based their interpretation on the prevalence of “Why?”. And it does seem to permeate it.

But the question that screams at me is Who was he? Of course I gravitated towards the search to pinpoint an identity. At 16, I appeared to be a stoner draped in flannel and dirty jeans. But at every chance I could steal, I would shimmy into a shiny shirt and head into town. The sounds of Donna Summer drifting onto the street marked my gay turf. I was excellent at being who I needed to be in the circumstance. But that was always a ruse to deflect everyone. Mirrored in the title track I got to ask who the hell was I?

As I listened again I thought about the male voices. Jesus & Judas sound hot, politely rough. But there was more. They are drenched in anguish? Up against death and despair they gave it song. I knew those feelings. Damn it, once again a simple question leads me back to the trauma. Believing I could have died, could been killed was too big to deal with. This opera gave a way for all of that to leak out of me.

Finally understanding I suspect I will continue to fondly remember walking down empty highways. In the dark, alone, I sang these songs. I cried and screamed and no one was there to know why. Today those secrets are open, I have my own words.

Next question.
 
I used to wander the back alleys and dark streets at night when I was a teen, when not actively selling myself, and Jesus Christ Superstar was one of the things I would sing. I knew the entire score. And I'm a full out atheist

But it always felt like such a glorious tragedy. The songs make every character's actions relatable, and downright logical. Even King Herod is given reasonable doubts, and only asks for evidence. The Pharisees are concerned about the people they are meant to shepherd, and act for the good of the many, so they believe.

And yet all of these good intentioned people contribute to the sacrifice of a man who has no desire to harm them. Jesus himself is such a cypher in the show. Its what everyone else puts onto him.

I didn't know who I was either. I lied about myself to myself. I imagined that the guy who was selling me to strangers was the great love of my life. Even in later years I turned the entire period into what one of my friends described as "Basketball Diaries with Disco Balls and Glitter" If I talked about it it was to show how much fun I had had and how none of it was a bad thing.

Maybe because everyone kept telling me how bad a persson I was as a kid. Picked on and beaten up and even by relatives cut down and treated like shit. not a "real" grandson. how can you trust anyone''s judgement when all they keep telling you is how awful and worthless you are. and if someone tells you nice things about yourself, they will turn out to have sexual motives and go after you that way.

Sorry, wow, too much information. It was just when you talked about singing the songs at night on the streets you brought me back.
 
OMG Ultraboy888*,
I feel like I found a brother. I knew every word also and sang all the way through, happily starting again. Be happy you never heard me, my voice sounds like Janis Joplin with strep throat. :)

Jesus himself is such a cypher in the show. Its what everyone else puts onto him.
That is a wonderful way to put it! Hell I was what everyone wanted to put on me. My family sure didn't look at who I was.

Please don't be sorry, that was not TMI. The shit he did to you needs be be said over and over! Of course you turned to him. Nice words probably seemed like a fair exchange. What a fucking creep to play your honest pain like that.
 
Ever since I was a teenager I have been obsessed with Jesus Christ Superstar. I’ve been a well adjusted agnostic since I was about 11. How does this telling, of this story fit so perfectly in me? I knew it wasn’t a subconscious yearning for faith. I was OK with my place in the universe. Yet Superstar has always brought me to tears.

that's the power of art... i'm an agnostic too & i reject organized religion, especially catholicism because people have repeatedly attempted to shove it down my throat (even a psychiatrist when i was in college!), but i love gregorian chants, even when they're performed by benedictine monks & even though i understand enough latin to know that what they're singing about is something i consider a fantasy. the voices & the melodies just hit the spot for me. it's the same with a couple of madonna songs. i think she's an obnoxious, boring egomaniac, but i could listen to her "ray of light" single for hours & i think the video for "frozen" is the coolest shit ever lol
 
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I've been singing it over to myself since my earlier posting. The one bit that alwayys was hard to sing, that always made me choke up and cry, and still does. was from Heaven on Thier Minds.

Listen Jesus to the warning I give
Please remember that I want us to live
But it's sad to see our chances weakening with every hour.

Fuck, can't even type it without crying.

and when I would sing that as a kid, it was sort of acknowledging the intense danger in my life. Like I knew the horribleness of what was going on, even though I wouldnt admit it or accept it. but in singing that line, i could let it be real.
 
@ultraboy8888, @SinkBackIntoTheOcean and any one else.

There is a production on YouTube this Easter weekend that looks amazing! I watched the opening scene and was moved. It is free but only until Sunday night 7PM BST. I am to excited, so my reading skills have tanked. I don't know where it was shot or who produced it. It stars Tim Minchin, Mel C and Chris Moyles.

 
The NBC live version from last year is going to play again on Sunday (the one with John Legend)
 
@NC-Survivor Thank you. I hope they offer that one to stream later. My husband can only take on Superstar per weekend LOL! But I have already listened to the original LP twice today, thank goodness for headphones!
 
My first thought was, “wow, the writing on this thread is amazing.”

Second thought, “Wait, gay guy sings ALW, go figure...”

I saw Jesus Christ Superstar when I was a kid and that song was instantly stuck in my head. I think ALW is an absolute genius.

Thanks for sharing guys!!!
 
LOL, now I can't get it out of my head.
 
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"I Dont Know How to Love Him" is one of my favorite songs, even though I usually hate anything by Andrew Lloyd Webber.
OMG, I ABSOLUTELY LOVE ALW. I think he is amazing! Probably because I'm really gay....
 
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