Is it harmful to stop masturbating?

I'm 50 years old and let's just say, I've got decades of experience, but for a while now I've been thinking about giving up masturbation. I gave it up for Lent, which, at first, was quite difficult but by the end I got used to it. Mentally, I feel much healthier, free-er of certain fantasies that weren't good for me and free-er from thoughts about my childhood sexual abuse. I'm thinking of just not starting again, but I've read that frequent ejaculation is good for prostate health and can reduce the risk of cancer? Any advice? Any research I can look at?
 

Ferguson

Registrant
I found it impossible until 2 years ago and have not since - I joined a 12 step program which enabled me. The thing for me is: What will fill the gap? If I'm just being a "dry drunk" I'll fail big time and do something much worse. Real connections are the solution to any addiction in my understanding. I've surrendered my prostate health to my Higher Power (in the 12 step we have to have a power greater than the addiction which is great than the power we have in ourselves). I believe this sobriety has enabled me to work through much more with my T of my CSA and family disfunction. "Progress not perfection"
 

manipulated

Moderator
Staff member
Having lost a brother to prostrate cancer and at the demand of a license revoked quack first T spent over two years in a 12 step group that gave me medals for not touching myself sexually (and realizing finally the room was full of perps whose higher power was allowing them to get off on my past trauma) I think your time is much better spent on a good Trauma t exorcising the guilt and shame implanted by the Perp and maintaining your health by proven methods.

prostaitis and the prostate cancer /non use correlation studies are out there and well documented but perhaps a safer and better inquiry is made with a urologist instead of a google search given the porn and other crap that may come up. Does your insurance provide telephone or internet consults especially now with covid? It might be an easier way to lose your question than in person. And certainly a more qualified response than any of us.
 
was quite difficult but by the end I got used to it. Mentally, I feel much healthier, free-er of certain fantasies that weren't good for me and free-er from thoughts about my childhood sexual abuse. I'm thinking of just not starting again, but I've read that frequent ejaculation is good for prostate health
if i lost the urge to masturbate & not doing it made me feel mentally healthier, i wouldn't start again
 

Guss

Registrant
Each individual is different. It helps keep my prostate and genitals healthy. Cleans out the pipes so to speak. I choose to not fantasize about things that are unhealthy for me. So, it just depends on you.
 

TJ jeff

Moderator
Staff member
learning2remember,

you asked for research so I'm going to 1st give you a link to a recent research study masturbation research link

I think an important question to ask yourself is - do you have any signs of an enlarged prostate? If you do then there are many studies that highly recommend frequent ejaculation to keep the ducts open and reduce swelling

Personally... I have had the talk with more than 1 urologist (long - short story) - being a guy who 1st started masturbating at the age of 5 due to the abuse I've taken it to extremes of over a dozen times a day - I've also quit completely and not touched myself for over a year (which lead to prostate problems)

Listen to your body - it will tell you when there is a problem
 
I think it’s natural and as long as you don’t do it in front of children/minors or anyone that doesn’t want to see it, there’s nothing wrong with masturbation. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with sex as long as it is consensual, with people of age, and you aren’t hurting anyone physically during or after sex (S&M type behaviors get a pass).
 

Ceremony

Moderator
Staff member
learning2remember,

you asked for research so I'm going to 1st give you a link to a recent research study masturbation research link

I think an important question to ask yourself is - do you have any signs of an enlarged prostate? If you do then there are many studies that highly recommend frequent ejaculation to keep the ducts open and reduce swelling

Personally... I have had the talk with more than 1 urologist (long - short story) - being a guy who 1st started masturbating at the age of 5 due to the abuse I've taken it to extremes of over a dozen times a day - I've also quit completely and not touched myself for over a year (which lead to prostate problems)

Listen to your body - it will tell you when there is a problem
@learning2remember This response from TJjeff is what I find works for me. Please be gentle with yourself.
 
Having recently had prostate issues.... Well, maybe not so recent anymore, but within the past year for sure.

Two different urologists recommended a sort of "evacuation." Actually anyone that was around in the chat room at the time of the issues, it was a running joke for at least a week: fruit, nuts and evacuation. Evacuation is obvious. Fruit... well, perhaps for another time. Nuts: the prostate is approx the size of a walnut. I had no idea something so small could cause so much pain.

Trying to find a solution for myself, I discovered that there are medical (or at least "medical") prostate massages, which are not the sort with a happy ending. That was the way the urologist in the video put it.

My prostate issue had nothing to do with a lack of evacuation though, as sad as it is to say. There were actually two separate occasions of the problem. The first one clearly had nothing to do with a lack of evacuation. And the second one... I just recently and finally gotten the evacuation problem under control. And now the guy is basically telling me to do it. How udderly frustrating. (That was an intentional misspelling for those with keen eyes to hopefully trigger a chuckle.)

Now...
Taking the evacuation issue into consideration....

There's plenty of reasons to do it. Plenty! Are they all "bad"? Honestly, it depends on who you talk to. I'm going to speak as both a man of deep, strong faith as well as a licensed (fully and formally) theologian.
Intent is key. Is it a drug? Is it really a sort of addiction? Getting stressed and overly tense... is rubbing one out the "go to" method for dealing with it? If that's the case, you're not doing yourself any favors. And chances are that's why you feel "freer" for having left it aside.
Catholicism, for good or bad, tends to talk about intrinsic evils. And the more I grow in age, and hopefully wisdom, the more it seems that Immanuel Kant didn't do anyone any favors when he devised his categorical imperatives. I mention this small aspect because even many protestant denominations use the same path, same method of thinking. But again... intent (coupled with a well-formed conscience) is really key. But at the same time, we can't get into a "whatever you want" realm, because that just makes reality relative. That's very dangerous and does no one anything good.

Is it harmful to you? It sure could be. Studies (which I'm sorry I can't reference without hours of research) have shown what happens with the process of orgasm, the endorphins and all that are released, what happens in the brain. It is something, similar to porn, that can become very addictive.

There's the general mainstream thought that if you're not doing anyone any harm, then so what? Go for it! But you very well could be doing yourself harm. Having been in your shoes of having a struggle... if you've successfully kept it aside and feel better about it, I'd strongly suggest not going back. I've slipped. And it's been difficult. I've had good reason to slip, but it's not an excuse because I know it doesn't do me any good in the end.

If your only concern is your walnut... there's other means of keeping it healthy. Including just focusing on a good diet!

Good luck!
peace!
 
I'm 50 years old and let's just say, I've got decades of experience, but for a while now I've been thinking about giving up masturbation. I gave it up for Lent, which, at first, was quite difficult but by the end I got used to it. Mentally, I feel much healthier, free-er of certain fantasies that weren't good for me and free-er from thoughts about my childhood sexual abuse. I'm thinking of just not starting again, but I've read that frequent ejaculation is good for prostate health and can reduce the risk of cancer? Any advice? Any research I can look at?
I've stayed away from it for 2 years now. The body knows how to take care of itself (nocturnal emissions).

My desire hasn't gone down either, it is always present and increasing if anything but I feel powerful being in control of myself and not giving in to my instincts. Despite being depressed from csa/other reasons, my libido remains unaffected, but everyone is different.

Just like you, I feel mentally and physically healthier abstaining from it. Also, I notice that I don't fantasize as much, which leads to me to believe that when I get married I'll be able to live in that moment and enjoy the moment with my partner. In my case, my religion plays a big role into it (Christian). This is also one of two areas where I stay away from medical advice because I've listened to my heart and mind; I feel good not doing it.
 

Hoping4Peace

Registrant
I have prostate isses and also porn addiction and SSA issues. I find that if the wife is travelling or sick or just not interested, at a time of the week when my body will just not let me rest, that I will just wank one out as quickly as possible and that really helps me to avoid the porn and stray thoughts. My wife knows that I do it and she will help me out through her tender caresses if she is not in the mood, she also gives me special memories to think of before she travels (sweet). I think that on a spiritual level I am trying my best to stay on track and to be faithful to both God and my wife, as long as my head is in the right place and not on porn, that it is the high road and the healthiest solution. It also helps me to not have to get up multiple times at night to pee!

While as a younger man I used to have lots of guilt about it, as I did it at least once daily- I almost always felt worthless and guilty afterwards. However, I now realize that if I had not mastrubated so regularly as a younger man- and with all those sexual powers, that I might easily have been swept away into a "normal" promiscuous sex life, which I had rejected as being ungodly and not what I wanted in life. Masturbation for me I now realize was an essential part of choosing a celebate life.... reserving the full sexual act for my wife- searching to find the right woman to be with for life.
I have become less self-judgemental in recent years through meditation and prayer, and I would encourage others to stop being so hard on themselves as well. I firmly believe that a good wank, when done to remain faithful of mind and body, not only is a BIG stress reliever, it is also good for the prostate, for lowering blood pressure, for clearing mental focus, and for stopping inappropriate sexual thoughts..... when accomplished appropriately, it feels right, and I praise God for his Loving mercy, kindness, and forgiveness.

If on the other hand, if it requires porn, or if it brings up pain and negative thoughts, then of course don't do it. But for those of you walking a spiritual path and struggling to make sense of your body's desires and how you might better keep them under control, it might help to look at the bigger picture of God''s love for you and not obsess about this so much? Even if you don't come over to my way if thinking, at least consider this: if severely tempted, isn't it best to choose the lesser of two evils?

Much love to you all,
 
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jas4159

Registrant
this is a great post. As with all things in the world of abuse - it is confusing to me at times. I don't plan on giving it up. for me it is natural and healthy and helps minimize the risk of prostrate cancer. or so I am told.
stay strong

rich
 
it will keep ur prostate health in better shape i wouldnt over do it though i keep to a few times a week another thing a dr. told me was to eat a brazil nut every day i cant recall whats in it but its supposed to be good for the prostate
 

Winterfr3sh

Registrant
I just started experimenting with holding my ejaculate for longer periods of days: I am on day 6 currently. I want to feel sensitive with my wife. I want stronger feelings of closeness that can come from feeling “pent up” down there.
however, it is at times uncomfortable for me to feel the “pressure” down there. I’ve never had a nocturnal emission in my life (started masturbation too early for it to ever occur naturally).
I don’t want to cum until I’m mentally ready, but the pressure down there can make it hard. Plus the worry that it’s not good to hold it in drove up anxiety today.
For those of you who hold it in for longer periods, how long did it take before you felt it was causing prostrate problems? Or perhaps its not causing issues yet? thanks guys
 

Suwanee

Chat Moderator
Staff member
I know this post is a bit old, but I've long created "contests" for myself...from how many times in a day to how long can I go.

14-21 days got uncomfortable...
 

Dewey2k

Moderator
Staff member
I think this is relevant here.

TL;DR: Men who ejaculate 21 times or more a month reduce their likelihood of prostate cancer by 31%

Harvard Medical School: Ejaculation frequency and prostate cancer

The Harvard ejaculation study
The Health Professionals Follow-Up Study has been collecting information about a large group of volunteers since 1986. All the men are health care providers, including dentists, pharmacists, veterinarians, optometrists, ophthalmologists, and podiatrists. Most are white. In 1992, 29,342 men between the ages of 46 and 81 provided information about their average number of ejaculations per month in young adulthood (age 20–29), middle age (40–49), and in the most recent year. Ejaculations included sexual intercourse, nocturnal emissions, and masturbation. The volunteers provided comprehensive health and lifestyle data every two years until the study concluded in 2000.

The scientists found no evidence that frequent ejaculations mark an increased risk of prostate cancer. In fact, the reverse was true: High ejaculation frequency was linked to a decreased risk. Compared to men who reported 4–7 ejaculations per month across their lifetimes, men who ejaculated 21 or more times a month enjoyed a 31% lower risk of prostate cancer. And the results held up to rigorous statistical evaluation even after other lifestyle factors and the frequency of PSA testing were taken into account.
 
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