I'm super uncomfortable being honest about my abuse story even in 12 step rooms
I don't know if they are. I've never heard anyone declare themselves that or any members call another guy a pedophile. People allude to "illegal porn" or "illegal behavior" and reading between the lines, it often means underage. I don't think every "addict" who progresses toward that line is a pedophile. I think many walk toward that line as a transgression/shame point for themselves. However, being a victim of CSA, I know what damage can be done and I feel like that's what this conversation has been about rather than pedophile vs not-pedophile. I think people who cross into illegal behavior even once, can do a lifetime of damage. I think some people take a full accounting of the damage they did or might have done but I wonder how many and I wonder if a lot of other men are letting them off of the hook because they also want to not face the damage that they've done.it's astonishing that people are willing to accept pedophiles as fellow sex addicts
I have to remember that at the end of the day (or my life), being a victim or a victimizer isn't the dividing line of good/bad. People are imperfect and some are seeking to be better and some are not. But certain 12 step rooms are not "designed" for survivors to get the support, help and identification that they need or want.