I will NEVER identify with my abusers, ever.


I was only a child when the abuse began. I did not have the maturity of experience to understand what kind of males and females my abusers were. But now I have arrived at the top of the slide of old age and I have a few reflections on my abusers:

They were all without exception godless. And that includes the wolf, the deceiver who wore the clerical garb. They did not believe in God or the proper place of faith and religion. How handy - without God there is no moral law to prevent them from doing whatever they wanted to do to a helpless child.

I will never identify with you, my abusers, who immortalized yourselves in film and on paper. You may laugh at me and say, "Where is your God now?" I will tell you. God is in me and He feels all that I feel. What you did to me, you did to Him.

God is alive and alive He will act. Although I was unaware of it before, He gives me consolation every moment of every day. And while you, my abusers, may have gotten away with your crime, the day will come when I will watch as you stand before the Throne of God and answer for everything you did to me. And if you stand without regret, I will watch you cast into the eternal fires of hell.

I am not like you, my abusers. I would prefer your repentance. But if you insist there is no God, then you will spend eternity where God is not.