*Triggers Possible* I just realized...

[blackrabbit223]

Trigger Warning: Mention of being threatened to comply with sexual abuse. It didn't happen to me (unsure?) just putting that warning out there.

For as much as I've talked about it here, I don't actually remember what Logan did very well. From my shoddy memories and eyewitness testimony (my sister), I can gather that:
- He flashed me 3 (+?) times
- Twice outside, one time in his house
- My sister saw one of the outside times and told my parents
- He would also hit me and say insults (but I can't recall them)

But I don't remember if he did anything further than that, what it looked like, if he threatened me into complying, anything... I don't remember what he said at all. I mostly remember what I was looking at before and afterwards.

Is there just some part of my brain that does, waiting until I finally do? The thought unnerves me.

 

[Immanuel_Varis]

Our minds do a lot of things to protect us from trauma. For me, for instance, I had no idea whatsoever that any of it happened until now (roughly 19 years later). I am glad that I didn’t remember any of it before, yes, because I would certainly have been way more of a mess than I was finding out now. I guess our minds just know when it is right for us to know. It knows what we can handle and what we can’t handle. Yeah, none of the trauma is great to handle, ever, but there’s something to say about the way us humans learn to survive and continue to survive day by day.

 

[LittleSteve]

Yes, I can echo this dramatically, my brain hid all of it for me for 60 years. But even when it started revealing it to me, it revealed it in stages that I could cope with and understand. For example, if you read my story, you’ll understand the significance of a baseball bat, but in my early memory reveals, which were very strong and very horrifying. At one point, the baseball bat was hidden when I retrieve the memory, it wasn’t till later that the baseball bat was there in that memory all the time, but my mind hit it from me because I wasn’t ready to understand it.

Another example, what a memory for surfaced my interpretation of that was completely different from what happened without going into too much detail, I remembered walking down the hallway, but that’s not what really happened. I was carried down that hallway, which was much more traumatic, and my mind kept that from me initially because I wasn’t ready to see that trauma, after I was ready then it showed it to me and it’s true form.

I believe our minds do this to protect us from what we’re not ready to see, and you may never see it. Our minds have a pretty good idea of what we can handle and what we can’t.